November 09 - Autumnal times are drawing near, soon our babes will be one year!

[MsInterpret]

Hello ladies, hope no one minds me taking the liberty of creating a new thread and approves of the name choice. We've been moving a bit slower than antenatal so though we'd most certainly have some year-olds by the time we finished this one!

sirB he has hip organic night time milk at 10:30 as it has rice thickeners in it and it definitely bought me at least an hour and a half more sleep. He eats enough during the day to get his calorie quota for the day, so I suspect the night feeds are more habit, or at least when he's not ill.
At the moment I'm going on the theory that if he wakes and I feed him, then at least he settles quickly after. If I try soothing then he'll drop off but wake again a few mins later, or just cry, and then I'm up for an hour anyway. Am shattered then at work so it's definitely path of least resistance here!
I figure eventually his stretches will just naturally get longer in time, but I may be kidding myself!

Thank you ladies for your support. It's so good to have you all to talk to. I forgot to mention yesterday. I took C to the GP to get his ears checked out. He has been poorly a lot recently. I needed to reassure myself that he was fit and healthy before I started my new 'sleep' regime. We made some improvement last night, but not much. He slept until 12am with a couple of moans along the way. He then woke hourly until he woke for the day at 4.30am . He's daytime naps are all over the place because of the stupid time he gets up of a morning. Have left my details with the sleep clinic and waiting to hear from them. Pav Not sure how I'll feel once I'm in touch with a sleep advisor. There is a lot of stuff I do know, but in the real world when you have to work and do school runs, I've not had the energy to carry anything out to improve things. I'm now serious and want a sleeping baby so badly. He seems to be able to self soothe back to sleep the first half of the night, the rest of the night is anyone's guess. Scarlotti where do you by the hip formula? I've not seen it in Sainsburys or Boots.

Aawww, like SirBoob I must say that I smile a little when I read about you also being at the end of your tether... at least if there's more than one of us it means that it's not the exception to a rule, right?

Me ALONE, I was thinking I've somehow ruined him for life. You can't all be as hopeless as I am! :D

Must say I've been eyeing up the Hipp Formula as well... our local Tesco stock it. On the other hand, we are in the middle of moving house and I think L is going to have SO many changes coming up that I need to keep the few things that I can, constant... like cosleeping and bfing. Maybe that's ridiculous?

What is all this business about 1 year checks? I asked our HV if he was supposed to have one but she said they only have one before they start school!

What sort of stuff do they check?

He's going for his MMR jab next week, and I've been umming and ahing about it for ages... I do KNOW, rationally, that there is no proven link with autism... and yet... I think because one of my brothers has Aspergers that I am a liiiitle bit nervy.

In other news, I've got something that feels very much like period pains! Where is the PHEW face?

Am just waiting for L to wake up from his nap(!) then we'll go in to town to the build-a-bear-workshop... he was given a gift certificate last xmas and I am only just getting around to it but I thought I'd wait until he's old enough to tell me which bear he wants! :)

morning/afternoon/whatever time it is.

Last night was horrendous. The cub woke every 1.5 hours with a horrid sounding sore throat (i thought it was a cat mewing outside at first!), but finally went to sleep at 11pm once drugs kicked in (had not been able to give them before as he already had some in the day - ibruprofen), he slept til 4am (woo, 4 hours for me! as i woke 1 hour before he did), then, he would not settle. At All. This is the standard pattern now, he either wakes at 2am ish and takes 1 hour tops to settle, then wakes at 4-4:30am and won't settle (but wants to) or he wakes at about 3 ish and won't settle. He only wants boob, but not because he is hungry. He suckles and suckles and goes to sleep and if I try to put him down in his cot he screams, arches his back, bucks and kicks his legs. Last night he did this for 15 mins until he finally settled in my arms asleep. I waited for 10 mins til i was sure he was asleep (legs twitching etc) and put him down - instantly awake, and furious) so it went on til 6am, when I asked DH to take over. Cue an enormous argument and me being blamed for our 'situation'. Ross is poorly, I have not fully recovered from the stomach bug due to no sleep and I had enough.

The upshot is, i went to the gp and been given some sleeping tablets (tamezepam no less!) so that DH can sort out Roo for a bit. DH suggested when I got back from docs that he will bring the cot in to our room, I should sleep up with DD for 3 nights and he will sort out Roo, he will be there for him while I take the sleeping tablets and sleep. He had said this morning before i went to GP that we should have done CC a long time ago. But when i had come back he conceded that we know our boy best, and he thinks what he needs is to see someone when he wakes, he thinks we can work it out if we are near him. He hugged me and said we are in together even if it feels hard and lonely. I told him he is now in control of this, I am taking a backseat (after being blamed, see how easy he bloody finds it), i have no strength.

I don't know if it will work but, at least if it doesn't I will hopefully get a bit of rest, ready to face the next stages whatever they might be.

Work, bloody hell, who knows. I called in sick today, feel terribly guilty, no-one is calling back so don't even know if it is all ok there or not. I feel like I am letting them all down, but i am letting my own family down if we don't get this sorted and I don't get myself back on track. Did not ask GP for sick note, silly really.

scarlotti we are going to try that formula milk, thanks for mentioning it. Roo won't take a bottle, so we are going to give him a pudding/supper of ready brek/weetabix with it in, feed him up as much as we can before bed. I am not convinced he is hungry, or else he would sleep again after breastfeeding, but it is worth a try.

Sorry, long memememe post. I will try to be more responsive to others soon.

fruit glad it was marginally better, but sound horrid still you poor thing my hand is here for a squeeze whenever you need it

Oh pav what a nightmare, you poor thing. I hope you didn't think I was being flippant when I said DH to the rescue, we were just very lucky enough that what I described worked for us. I feel awful for all the mummies not getting enough (any?!) sleep

Good luck tonight pav with your sleep remedies and good luck fruit with the sleep clinic and brood with the h'path remedies.

Mr Sandman, our babies need you!

Pav Sounds like its the best plan for your DH to take over for a couple of nights. Give you a chance to get yourself better and stock up on sleep. Hope you feel better about things with some good sleep behind you and that your DS gets the message that night time is for sleep! My DH is back at 4am tomorrow morning. He has been away since Sunday so that hasn't helped my frame of mind. Tonight, I stuck to the same routine as last night. He took 5ozs of milk and had to put him to bed at 6pm again as he was shattered. Placed him in cot awake and he moaned for a while, now is asleep, let's see how long it lasts!

Along with the feeling of no energy, I look a mess too. My skin has broken out in spots and my eyes looks grey. DH is off Thurs and Fri so I think we're moving C in to his own room. We can then work on things.

Lot's of sleep vibes to all the babies. Good luck tonight

Happy Birthday Bryn! Hope you're having a lovely day SB xx

Its tomorrow, Fruit, but thank you very much :) Have felt very strange today - didn't think it was bothering me that much, really, and then suddenly it hit me that I have a toddler and not a baby any more. Feel quite emotional actually

Though the next arse who says "Oh, what a shame about his birthday" shall get a slap.

Pav that sounds like hell, really it does :( Know what you mean with the "I need boob or I'm wide awake and very angry" senerio too. I hope tonight is better for you. Big big hugs.

Fruit big hugs for you too :(

The developmental thingy went well :) The HV were really nice, and I did go in prepared for a nightmare! They said he was doing fantastically and praised me for how happy he was. Feel I can't really take the credit for his personality but it made me smile all the same. They were also very nice about his weight - he's lost 5g since he was last weighed (in September) but is now on the same percentiles for weight and length. So he's just finding the right place for him.

Happy birthday Bryn, for tomorrow!! One already, this year has gone so fast, even with lack of sleep (or maybe because?!)

I won't even bother to go over what has gone on this evening. Lets just say, the cot is on our room, DH is out, and I am not taking any sleeping tablets tonight. great.

fruit i know what you mean about the skin. The gp said he thought i looked worn out. Nice. I also have spots, about 6 of them, and have not had facial spots apart from the very odd minor pinprick one since i was pg with DD. Although think i had a couple when pg with Roo, but not lots. I have ashen crepey skin, eyes vaguely bloodshot. Not a pretty woman at all these days.

Pav :( You can rant if you need to.

Pav heavens girl, I hope to hear you are getting some sleep soon and your DH bucks up and comes through with his promise. Do not be hard on yourself and do whatever it takes to get some sleep. I think your theory about seeing you sounds right - does any of this tie in with when he got his fright from the mirror breaking?

Fruit good luck with the sleep clinic and also moving him into his own room. I have to say that for us, that helped as I was picking him up at the first murmur (probably I was half asleep) and he came in with me from then on. When he moved, we had a night or two where he'd murmur and by the time I woke and started to get out of bed, he'd dropped back off. I still took him in with me for the rest of the night from the feed onwards though.
I figure as long as he goes to sleep in his cot, then goes back in his cot after the dream feed that is good enough. The early morning feed will stretch out later eventually.

The last few nights I've fed him at 3 or 4am and put him back in his cot - easier now as we're bottles of cows milk at that time. Have to say that it seems to be helping as he then goes back down ok and sleeps. On the down side though I'm getting more broken sleep as I have to wake now and sort the bottle, but that's starting to turn into auto-pilot!
The Hip Organic milk is in Tesco, not Sainsbury's or Boots, it is also elsewhere but I can't remember where! If you go to their site they tell you. Def not co-op though as I've tried there.
I don't think it's necessarily hunger here either Pav, but the night time milk definitely seems to sit in his tummy longer so delaying the stirring which results in hunger pangs.
I also am trying to fill him up more in the day, going on the premise that if he eats a lot then he won't need as many calories at night. Who knows if that actually bears any weight at all!

SirB Ds1 is also an armistice baby - some people are just ignorant with their comments. I quite like the fact - as does he now he's old enough to be born on the 'soldier's special day'!

Daytime naps are dropping here so that's yet another thing to contend with - it's just all change yet again!

scarlotti I had not considered the whole bathroom incident. No i don't think it was that, he has never been a great sleeper, but, i can't remember but it may well have coincided with refusing the bottle, which while itself was not the cause of his lack of sleep, certainly meant he was not ever moving forward, but going backwards. I might go back and re-visit some of my posts, see if there is a link. Luckily, he loves a bath now, and if either of us are in, or DD is in it, he crawls up to it, and bounces giggling until he gets in!

I stuffed him full of pudding just before bedtime (custard with no sugar in, hungry baby formula, can't find the hipp stuff you were talking about either scarlotti), have not fed him any boob today due to being very sore from his constant suckling the last two days so had full boobs, he has had one side, and fell asleep dribbling he was so full and sleepy! I have placed him in his cot no fussing at all, snoring gently, out for the count. Funny, but when he saw his cot when we came into our bed, he giggled and wanted to look at it, seemed pleased. A good sign? probably means bugger all.

But i am likely over-analysing, and he is likely going to wake within the next 2 hours, and continue as normal. I don't even dare hope out loud anymore. At least I am not puking any more though eh

Thanks for listening ladies.

Haven't been here for a while but just wanted to show a bit of solidarity with the non sleepers club! Isaac wakes up at two o clock on the dot every day. I just can't settle him so bring him in to our bed where he sleeps for 10mins, wakes up, falls asleep for another 15mins, wakes up... repeat till morning. I'm absolutely knackered at work. Had a meeting at 3.30 today and had a colleague prod me to wake me up. I'm really worried that I'm going to fall asleep on my train and wake up miles away. I think it might be SA related and keep hoping it's just a phase. If only I could afford to stay at home and cuddle him all day :(

Sorry quick MIL rant. Came home today to find Isaac's t shirt and jumper with chocolate stains on it after MIL had looked after him. He's 13months old :( Not the first time either.

Happy Birthday for tomorrow Bryn! (And Sirboob a little glass of something fizzy might be in order for you too?)

lemontop that is very similar to Roo, and I think SA has something to do with. DH said 'i am getting immune to his cries' and means he ignores him more, or says stuff like 'if you are going to keep crying i will put you down' and I think 'noooo don't become immune! he needs you, don't put him down he needs you!' and wonder if I am being too soft/over-indulgent. He seems to think we need to be tougher as he is a boy or something, i am sure we were not so harsh on DD as a baby this age. I, like you, want to stay at home and cuddle him, and play with him. He loves me being on the floor playing toys with him Much much more than DD did even.

On a lighter note - what is everyone buying their babies for their birthdays, and then what about for christmas? I am thinking maybe a trike? is he too young? DD was, but that is because she was so tiny she could not put her feet to the ground, but Roo is much bigger and pushes himself on his indoor trikey thing already! (well, i say pushes, moves his feet in an attempt to propel!). DDs is pink! We have Vtech rocket shape sorter, a wow tracter/combine harvester thingy, a musical nemo bath toy thing, some other cars, not sure what order to give them to him either, don't think it really matters? i don't want to go overboard with presents, he won't care, and he also plays with all DDs anyway. I really really want to get a fisher price garage but one just went on ebay for (wait for it) £60 in sept, they were only £20 max! i will wait for those, new year they will be cheap again! I don't want christmas to be entirely about presents for either child.

Have just wrapped Bryn's presents. He's getting:

• Socks, leg warms, leggings and an extra pair of mittens (am preparing for a cold winter )
• A "That's Not My" book; getting two more for Christmas.
• A pull along catapillar.
• A sing along Disney Book (he dances when Handy Manny comes on ).

I wanted to get him a rocking elk from Ikea Think that might have to wait for Christmas.

Pav it's sleep deprivation getting on top of your family. Try to be patient with one another. Really aiming that at your husband, he certainly owes you a decent sleep tomorrow night!

My mum's getting Ethan a garage for his birthday but I think it's from toys r us, maybe about £25? He loves moving his cars around trying to say "broom broom" like mummy does. My mum changed his nappy today, a smelly one and said "yabba-dabba-doo" which he repeated clear as day. Not quite saying things that make sense, still quite random with the mummmmm and dad dad dad dad but hopefully it'll be more obvious soon that he understands the meaning. Oh, but he does say "Ri" for our dog, Rocky, who he loves to share his dinner with from on high. :)

SirB enjoy your special day tomorrow! I remember your DP posting your birth announcement, he was soooo proud of you. :)

Ioan got a walker with bricks in, one of the old fashioned looking ones. He also got a shape sorter thing - all old toys of DS1 so a free birthday for us .. same as Christmas will be!

He was off ill again today as he was sent home from the childminders yesterday. DD was looking after him and said he kept saying 'mama' them bum shuffling to look at the front door to see if I was coming home .. poor sausage. I got the biggest cuddle when I got home - he wraps his arms around my neck and pats me gently and gives me a kiss - melts my heart every time

AW Ioan sounds gorgeous!

I'm hoping everyone had good nights' sleep and all babies are fit and well.

Happy Birthday Bryn! Hope you all enjoy it SirB

It sounds like everyone's getting lovely presents. James has one of those old walkers with bricks Scarlotti and he loves it. I think we're going to get him a trike Pav. I'm not sure if he'll be too young - it says suitable from 9 months and they look well strapped in. DD had a bike for her birthday, so I'm hoping to be able to take them both out on them together this way. It's way too stressful pushing a pushchair and trying to chase a bike downhill!

MissI I think it would help us if James wasn't sleeping in our room, but we haven't really got anywhere else for him to go. DD's room is too small for another bed. I keep finding myself house hunting online, which is stupid as I am not really working, so if we moved we'd only get a mortgage based on DH's salary. I have to wait until DD starts school next year and then either build up my hours with James in nursery or find another job, and then we can move house.

Hi all, so my baby is 1 today and I feel so sad! I've had a few tears today already. What is wrong with me?
Anyway, happy birthday to Bryn also and sirboob I hope you feel better than I do today.

Happy birthday little tigger!

And what a munchkin Ioan sounds scarlotti!

Hope some better sleep was had by all last night...?

laugs sympathies. If we have another one we'll be in the same boat. And it's looking like there won't be funding for my job next year (surprise, surprise) so it's back to jobhunting in a few months for me too...

Doom and gloom!

Haha MsI... I share that sentiment!

Pav things any better today? x

happy birthday Henry!!! hope you and your tigger mummy had a great day!

Today, better? Mmm. Well, i went to work. Had a 'back to work' meeting with my boss, who promptly told me I had to take next week off as annual leave and to spend the next two days getting my cases covered. She also felt it prudent to give me some 'advice' on stopping breastfeeding as it was clearly not doing me any good, clearly taking its toll, and that I needed to 'toughen up' with him and not be so soft (music to DH's ears I can tell you!) she had a LOT to say about raising children, not least that it is clearly an extremely difficult thing to raise two children and work, and to, well basically, to go away and 'sort my family out' [shock[ but she funnily enough said it in a supportive way and said I am good at my job, but my work has suffered in the last few weeks and the 'bouncy woman' who returned a few months ago is disappearing . She said I should not be worrying about work, or about racking up sick days/consequences of that when leave can be managed etc etc.

I then saw HV, given advice on sleeping, advised CC/CIO, advised NOT to have him return to our room too late and lots of advise, discussion about whether i might have pnd etc etc, breastfeeding, do i want to stop, i should not if i don't want to, don't be pressured.

I then came home and spoke to DH about it all. And he has interpreted it all as I am listening to others and not him, don't give a toss about his views, and when i told him he was in control of how we move forward for now (i can't cope with it) he said 'why? you never do what i tell you, you won;t be told, why now?'

Put DS to bed, could not face another evening of the normal routine so i walked away from it all 20 mins later and a lot of crying/leaving him to CIO, and he fell asleep in DHs arms. It was not so much intended, i could not face another night of being told i had fucked it all up.

So i guess everyone else is right and I am wrong after all.

oh and last night, meant to say, DH came back at midnight, i fed DS and went to bed in loft room on spare bed, and listened to him crying/wind howling/rain on skylights for an hour or so, went to sleep, woke to him stirring and then DD woke up, around 5:30am? so i guess about 4 hours sleep? fussy, figity sleep but sleep nevertheless. DH said he took about an hour to sleep then slept til 5:30am when i heard him. A start, but in bed, not in the cot.

Pav sorry to hear about your day and that your DH is taking all that's going on so personally. Just try to remember that the lack of sleep will make you feel as though everything is worse than it actually is. Hoping things improve for you soon.

Shattered here day started at 4:30 and Ioan didn't really settle from then on. DS1's birthday today and the HV check so I've been on the go all day. Forgot to eat this afternoon and was so tired and hungry by 7:30 I could have curled up and slept forever!

DH still hasn't moved, despite now having the flat since last Weds. He decided he wanted to stay here for the boys' birthdays which is fine, but I wish he'd decided that from the start and planned around it so we all knew. Also then he could have avoided 10 days rent. Still, he's supposed to be going tomorrow/Sat so hoping that happens. Need some space and need to declutter and tidy this house - it's doing my head in and making me feel like my life is unravelling. Daft I know, but I'm definitely one of those people who feels happier when home is relatively clean and sorted - it's a long way from a show home, but even for me the amount of clutter here at the moment is horrendous!

Scarlotti hope he gets a move on soon :( I'll be in your area this weekend if you need a wine coffee.

Pav sorry its all so crazy for you right now. Though a bit at your boss. Do what's right for you - you're doing fantastically, and have a lot on your plate right now.

The estate agents haven't confirmed my moving in date so I can't send off my HB forms. Am getting a bit stressed. I know I need to call them but the thought makes me feel sick. Have got a medication review on Monday and can't come fast enough!