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Any Witches Here? Part 16

989 replies

speakout · 25/12/2021 11:13

Or Wiccans. or Pagans? Or anyone who is interested in a magical path or feels some magical stirrings.

A place for support, learning, swapping ideas and magical inspiration.

OP posts:
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hilariousnamehere · 22/01/2022 09:22

It's been a crazy week!

Thank you all for reassurance about kitties - I did wake up to some rather extreme litter tray deposits on Wednesday but having spoken to vet was less worried than I would have been, and both fluffy idiots are more than ok in themselves. I'm very soothed to hear other cats go off their food or get finicky in winter - mine have always been piglets all year round so maybe they're finally learning how to cat properly?!

Speakout sometimes self care is making sure our schedule isn't overloaded, even if it means taking some nice things out. I hope all goes to plan this week, and thank you for the kintsugi share!

Hills how was your mini escape? I hope things are more settled for you this week too.

AnotherCrazyBirdLady so glad your DS is enjoying his job, and I loved your story of the little cat!

Oh no I have lots more replies to make but have to dash for now - family celebration and I promised I'd try not to be late Blush catch up later, have a magical day loves!

HillsBesideTheSea · 22/01/2022 09:56

My sit on a hill was productive. I managed to see the wood from the trees in terms of scheduling, and what needs to be done. I was treated to the sight of a hunting barn owl just before i left.

I caught up with a friend last night which was nice. A heavy stressful week is ahead of me next week but first I have a long walk planned for this weekend.

VioletCharlotte · 22/01/2022 10:56

Good morning sisters. I'm feeling rather fragile today after a difficult couple of days. DS is struggling with his mental health again, and I don't seem to be able to help him at all. In fact, everything I say seems to make him worse. It's so upsetting to see him like this, but also frustrating as he doesn't help himself. I've decided to step back a little, his girlfriend and best friend seem to be able to reach him much better than I can.

Speakout my feeling is that when self care feels like part of a 'to do' list then it's not self care, so I think it's a good decision to cut back a little. It sounds like you're feeling frazzled and overwhelmed by looking after others too, sending you solidarity Thanks

Moregarlic the 'normal' ranges in the UK are much lower than in other countries. I would recommend upping your vitamin D to see if it helps. Did they check your iron and B12 levels, and your thyroid? I feel GP's reply far too much on tests rather than paying attention to symptoms. It's clear from what you've said that something's not right so to be told 'everything looks normal' isn't helpful.

Breathwork is interesting. I did a class that sounds very similar at a yoga retreat a few years ago. I didn't enjoy the experience as it brought so many painful memories to the surface, but it was a powerful release. I cried about things I'd suppressed for years. It was only a few months later that I realised that the pain I'd been holding on to wasn't there anymore. I'm sorry you felt dreadful this morning, it sounds like this is part of the healing process. Be kind to yourself over the next few days.

Hills glad you're feeling better after some time on the hill. How wonderful to see an owl. I hope you enjoy your walk today.

speakout · 22/01/2022 12:49

VioletCharlotte my heart goes out to you- it is so hard to see our child in difficulties and feel powerless to help, and not even sure what is the best approach to take.
Sometimes stepping back is the best thing to do, at least for a while, for you to steady your anchor, and to give him space to take ownership of his problems.Letting him know you are there and will help if he needs you to. Much easier said than done- I am a fixer, and want to sort out problems, but sometimes that isn't always the best course of action.
hilariousnamehere " sometimes self care is making sure our schedule isn't overloaded, even if it means taking some nice things out." Exactly the wise words I needed to hear at the moment- thankyou! You are so right. and just 5 minutes after reading your post I had a phone call to say tomorrow's yoga is cancelled because the instructor is unwell.
So that is my schedule trimmed a little already! Synchronicity!
I will think about balancing my week ahead, Tarot is often useful to me for this, showing me directions I need to move in, and loads I can drop. I will cancel some appoinments- self care can come in other ways, like getting more sleep, eating some healthy food.
My half hour back massage may destress, but come with a price, I have no back issues, perhaps some exotic fruit and an early night may be just as nurturing, and a lot less costly!
HillsBesideTheSea I am glad you took the time to do some hillsittig- sounds perfect, sitting atop a hill is a powerful place to be.
My mother is feeling a bit better, up and dressed, a little weak and unsteady, but improving.

A wise bunch of women here!!

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moregarlic · 23/01/2022 06:49

I’ll catch-up properly soon but to answer a few questions about the blood tests, they did a really comprehensive set including b12 (505ng/l), serum iron (62.2ug/l), serum folate (9.2ng/ml), full blood count, thyroid, liver function, prediabetes etc. and all came back in their normal range.

I’m very glad everything looks ok, but equally, today I’ve woken up with yet another cold. It’s not even been a month since my last one.

I’m feeling really fed up and at a bit of a loss. I might go and see a Chinese medicine practitioner as someone suggested earlier in the thread. As for now, I’m off to download the body keeps the score.

I feel petty complaining about recurrent colds, I know it’s hardly a serious health complaint but it’s more the ongoing nature of them / concern for my poor immune function. Barely a weekend seems to go by without some minor health issue.

speakout · 23/01/2022 08:15

moregarlic good to hear your results came back OK, how is your lifestyle otherwise? Weight? Do you exercise? Enough sleep? MH?Stress? Woodburning stove? Do you live in the city?

OP posts:
moregarlic · 23/01/2022 08:24

I’m in the healthy BMI range, eat simple nutritious food, sleep 7-8 hrs a night, no wood burner, live in a town on the coast in the SW.

I’d say the past two years have been the most stressful of my life and my mental health has taken a bit of a battering, though I do feel in a much better place atm.

Exercise - I’d just got back into lifting, but have had to pause until next month for various reasons. I could definitely stand to do more exercise, though I move lots throughout the day thanks to our dog and toddler and the consequential lifestyle!

BlankTimes · 23/01/2022 13:37

moregarlic

Sounds as though your immune system could do with a boost.
These are the things I use

Vogels Echinacea tincture, full dose taken for 3 days immediately, then only at the first onset of any cold symptoms.
www.avogel.co.uk/herbal-remedies/echinacea-echinaforce/

Active Kimchi www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/vadasz-raw-kimchi-400g

Active sauerkraut www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/fresh-olives-and-antipasti-tapas-mezze/vadasz-raw-garlic-dill-sauerkraut-400g

Active Barley Miso Paste www.clearspring.co.uk/products/organic-japanese-barley-miso-paste-unpasteurised

Kefir www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/SearchResults/kefir

Sainsbury's is my local supermarket, hence all the links, but do shop around for brands, price-saving etc.
Whichever good gut products you take, it's imperative that they are active. They usually taste pleasantly slightly 'fizzy as a rough rule of thumb.

Aim to take some of two types of good gut product daily for a month, then see how you feel. Halloween Smile

Have a magical day everyone !

Aerwyna · 23/01/2022 20:02

Good evening friends,

I hope everyone is finding pockets of peace amongst what seem to be intense and testing times for many.

I’m glad to hear of the focus on self care in all aspects and am sending supportive energy to those facing ongoing challenges. So much mental and emotional labour too, I know how wearing it can be. But the small moments really do add up to a kind of resilience bank I think, something to draw on when times are particularly tough.

Reading everyone’s posts, the challenges and deep concerns faced by my sisters here, I’m struck by a theme of balance; intuiting when to take a step back, share the load with others where we can, take guidance and advice, carve out the time we need, when to draw our energy back to our own core, rest or take action, shift focus as needed.. and so it goes on.

Life really is a balancing act isn’t it and self compassion, no matter what’s going on feels like an important ingredient to approach any situation with. Just as a wise witch knows that any working needs to start with our own feelings or the impact of the situation on us, I love the way we hold this energy for each other here. A gentle reminder when it’s hard to see for ourselves. As ever I feel gratitude for finding such wise and strong sisters here. Such a powerful mix of energy.

Sending support as I light my 8pm candle

Trenzalor · 24/01/2022 17:50

Greetings all. Just a brief catch up from me. Covid again. Third time. I knew it was coming (I’m getting better at listening to those inner voices) so have been testing twice a day most of the last week. I also got everything ready for my class for the whole week. I never normally manage to be that organised.

I hope everyone else is well, life and family struggles permitting.

moregarlic · 25/01/2022 06:58

@BlankTimes thanks for the links, I already eat a lot of kimchi and sauerkraut but I could always diversify.

@Aerwyna lovely words as always, I think you’re spot on with striving for balance. Such a Simple concept, yet so hard to fully and consistently grasp.

@Trenzalor three times! I hope you’re ok and make a speedy recovery. Such a comfort to be so well organised at least. Have you found much helps?

I can’t help shake this feeding of being a bit pathetic to be getting so many colds and other petty illnesses and then being so negatively affected by them. I don’t have a super stressful life, I work part time etc. My cold has turned into a hacking cough now and I was up half the night with it. Thoroughly fed up. Normally I am gracious with the seasons, but I just want to see the back of winter now.

HillsBesideTheSea · 25/01/2022 12:02

Society conditioning is such a destructive thing. We are not meant to be on the go all the time, sometimes we do just get sick alot. Sometimes it is needed to build our immune systems stronger for the future. I had long noted that there are years where I get every thing but also years where i get virtually nothing and that there seems to be an almost cyclical pattern to it. It is a natural pattern. Sorry you are having such a rough time of it of late MoreGarlic hope you can find some relief from all the illnesses soon.

Normally i love the cold too Moregarlic but i find myself eager for long sunny days when i can feel more energised. But i suspect that it is partly stress driven and it being easier to get out for a long evening walk. I am still in hibernation mode and bed by 8pm atm

Trezalor - sorry to hear you have covid again. i hope that you are not suffering from it and that it is a speedy recovery.

Stress has had me floored. It is literally one thing after another and my sinsuses are in rebellion over all the jumping about in temperature so i currently have the worst earache. But as i also have a meeting with school today I am going to throw a rather large handful of lemon balm for its calming affect into the thyme tea I will be consuming for my earache. All i want to do is walk, but have no motivation to do so when it gets cold and dark. But i think i am going to just make the effort after the school meeting, whilst there is daylight and treat myself to a hill walk.

queenrollo · 25/01/2022 13:05

Oh we do sound a tired collective at the moment.
I'm joining the throng i'm afraid as I lost all of Saturday to a migraine that had been threatening for days. Sunday wasn't too great either and it's set off my neuralgia too.
Fortunately I woke up this morning feeling much improved but still a little fragile, so I am taking things easy.

I am thinking for the first time in my life I need to look into some kind of detox. I honestly feel like all of my insides are sludgy and I need cleaning out. I have never felt like this, even when I smoked and drank heavily - but my body is not happy right now.

BlankTimes · 26/01/2022 01:43

Good evening sisters, I think a lot of the exhaustion a lot of us are feeling, as well as the causes we've discussed, comes from trying to fulfil other peoples' often unrealistic expectations of us, not just physically but emotionally too.

It's a lot easier to attribute things to physical causes, but the emotional toll we're all under can be immense at times and unless you're well-versed in self-care and depending on which practises you follow, you can miss out on some self-help techniques to deal with your emotional overload.

There's nothing in the Western World that has ever acknowledged that we need to take care of our emotional health, the systems we have today like EFT and EMDR have their roots in Traditional Chinese Medicine using points on the Meridian system and the three energy-centres (Dan Tien) Vitality, Loving and Wisdom)

The Chakra system has its roots in Ayurveda, yoga practitioners will be familiar with working within this system.

The Japanese awareness and practise using Ki has been brought to the West mainly with Reiki and has suffered a horrendous amount in translating its form from Usui's original teaching into something that people in the West would accept.

If any of the Eastern philosophies or the Westernised imports are something you've not yet tried, please consider exploring them for more tools to add to your self-care toolbox, it may help you achieve the theme of Balance Arewyna so intuitively observed, it's also called Equilibrium in Taoism.

Any Witches Here? Part 16
speakout · 26/01/2022 07:18

blanktimesyou are right, I can feel myself struggling to stay afloat at the moment, and I make time and space for self care. Moods ebb and flow, but ths winter a persistence of low mood has tailed me wherever I go. I can fell better for a few days, then wake up with a heavy feeling of gloom that is hard to shake off. I doesn’t help that other family members are struggling with MH, my elderly mother now too I feel is sinking a bit after years of covid and her social lifelines have not really recovered.
Any change in routine or extra task feel so heavy- my OH got a new car yesterday (not brand new, but new to him) and I had to take time out of my day to help him pick it up. He was excited but I felt flat and resentful that I had to take time out of my working day to help him, then I had to go to ASDA on the way home to pick up all the boring stuff that we all need, but I felt resentful about that.
By the time I got home I had to put away all the shopping and start getting dinner ready. Realised that missing an afternoon of work meant a stressful backlog was building up so have switched off ordering processes.
I am fed up caring for others, being the responsible one having to sort out the day to day care and sort out benefit applications etc for other people.
The time for me is so squashed, and it feels tight and uncomfortable.
On the plus side I have just started a course on women’s empowerment, just a few hours a week, and have been accepted for counselling sessions with a private counsellor specialising in carer’s support- paid for by a local charity. Again these things will mean more time that I feel I don’t have, but hopefully will be beneficial in the log run.
Blanktimes you posted some EFT videos recently- would you mind posting them again? I am afraid I am rather a scramble at the moment.
aerwyna as you say it is about finding balance, and “ self compassion, no matter what’s going on feels like an important ingredient to approach any situation with.” That’s so wise, I think to have more compassion for myself, the scales have tipped a little too much in favour of others right now, I need to pull back some of that energy for myself. It can be hard when we a carer though. But sometimes we can facilitate those we care for a little too much. My mother is generally fit for her age, but will step back and let me cook and bring her meals on a tray into her room. I found her hanging up all her winter woollens outside after having a spring clean of her things. She is physically able to cook or make a sandwich, but she dislikes cooking- I should consider pulling back on that one. But she struggles to maintain her weight, and if not “presented” with a meal will eat chocolate and ice cream instead. Maybe that is not my responsibility either though!!!!
Thanks for listening to me, it helps to lighten the load a little. Off for a spa shower with some of my favourite soap, then a gentle yoga class at 9am. I still have work today, but I feel some ready meals are in order for dinner tonight- at least for those that can but won’t cook.
Have a gentle day dear friends.

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AnotherCrazyBirdLady · 26/01/2022 09:32

Good morning, dear sisters.
Well, I stepped off this thread for a few days because my energy was so low, and now I see most everybody is feeling the same and reading all your posts, I strangely feel a little better knowing I'm not alone! Honestly, these days it's like wading through treacle and being immeasurably grateful to get into bed at the end of the day. I'm placing great importance on self-care, even if it's the simple things like a cup of herbal tea or a stretch I really enjoy. I do struggle at times with thoughts that I am too self-indulgent, too selfish but then remember how I felt when I didn't practice these little acts - a stark contrast!

Thankfully, a brighter day here today, and I shall send some solar energy to those who need it xxx

hilariousnamehere · 26/01/2022 10:17

I think MN ate my post last night as there is no sign of it this morning Hmm

Wanted to share some of the joy from yesterday - life is indeed like wading through treacle at the moment, but I spent yesterday with one of my best friends in the world, our first time just us since pre-pandemic and her having her baby (who I also love to distraction). We were catching up and plotting business things and it has restored my equilibrium although I'm shattered from life and the long drive. But I wanted to bring some of that light here as we do all seem to be having testing times at the moment.

Today is set aside for creating but after I've zoomed to set plans for the day I might actually go back to bed...

BlankTimes · 26/01/2022 14:01

Well, here's some serendipity, I googled 'youtube' to then look for the EFT videos Speakout had asked me to post, and this one started automatically playing right in front of me. It's not the last one I watched by a long way.

On the basis that one or more of us need this desperately, here you go. Halloween Grin I'll do another post with the requested EFT vids in a sec.

BlankTimes · 26/01/2022 14:27

The EFT videos that Speakout asked for Halloween Smile

I can't believe it's about 20 years since I got my EFT Practitioner certificate, I forget that this technique may be new to some folks, so for starters
How to Tap Jessica Ortner

This one's great if you're new to Tapping or experienced, it's for Love Peace and Light Jessica Ortner

Releasing anxiety Jessica Ortner

From Panic to Peace Nick Ortner

Playlist for Tapping Meditations
www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6nd1vbjqG8UkHPHDFUH1GCu53MLimX1Q

Lots more of their videos.
www.youtube.com/user/TryItProductions

speakout · 26/01/2022 14:37

That's just perfect blanktimes- thank you.

OP posts:
BlankTimes · 26/01/2022 15:02

You're very welcome Sister Witch Halloween Smile Flowers

moregarlic · 26/01/2022 17:54

@HillsBesideTheSea you’re right, we’re not meant to be on the go all the time. I can’t thank you enough for pointing out that it is normal sometimes for our immune system to pick up lots, in order to get stronger. I was spiralling quite badly until I read that. I am going to focus on doing what I can, and if I get something, resting as much as I can and trying not to stress about it. Sorry to hear you are feeling stressed too lately, it seems you’re far from alone if our magical thread is anything to go by. I hope the meeting with the school went OK and you were able to get out on that hill walk.

@queenrollo a tired collective! That’s about the measure of it! Sorry to hear you’ve been dealing with migraines, they are just hideous. I’m pleased to hear you’re on the mend, but they do tend to cause a “hangover” don’t they? Have you any idea where to start with your detox? I don’t have much experience. I did a juice cleanse when they were in vogue about a decade ago. It wasn’t really for me! Could you look into some gentle fasting perhaps?

@BlankTimes “think a lot of the exhaustion a lot of us are feeling…comes from trying to fulfil other peoples' often unrealistic expectations of us, not just physically but emotionally too.” I think you may well be on to something there. I know certainly for me, this follows the back of a hectic winter of socialising (often when I didn’t really want to) and having people in my space. I also think a lot of it is not dealing with the grief of a bereavement earlier in the year, because I was too busy trying to support everyone else. Even now, my dog has been diagnosed with a terminal illness, and I am running around trying to make sure everyone else is OK when in fact I’m hopelessly heartbroken myself. Sorry, bit of a ramble there. Anyway, I agree with you that emotional causes can result in physical manifestations. We often forget that the mind and body are entirely connected. I loved reading about the different systems for emotional health – I have tried acupuncture for a health issue (with great success) and have dabbled with EFT. What is your go to?

@speakout I am sorry to hear you are having such a hard time of it at the moment too, I can’t imagine the crushing responsibility of being a carer for an elderly relative / relatives with MH issues. I find during times of turmoil like that, I cling to my routines for sanity, so it doesn’t surprise me to hear that having your working day interrupted for someone else’s life admin was irritating. “I am fed up caring for others, being the responsible one having to sort out the day to day care and sort out benefit applications etc for other people.” So what would happen if you stopped? Or said you needed a break, at the very least? We can’t give what we don’t have. Or we battle on, tirelessly but resentfully, and that isn’t ultimately helpful for anyone in the long run. Your women’s empowerment course sounds incredible, that along with the counselling will hopefully provide you with some space and time to process everything and get yourself back to where you want to be. On a side note, if I’m feeling burnt out, I am all for cutting corners. If your mum is capable of cooking but won’t cook, I would either offer her whatever you’re making for yourself or simply buy in some ready meals for her. We can’t just give and give and give until there is nothing left for us.

@AnotherCrazyBirdLady I’m glad you feel less alone, I’ve certainly done my fair share of moaning on this thread lately! Re: beating yourself up for being selfish/indulgent when really all you’re doing is taking care of yourself, I have a couple of simple mantras I repeat to myself that snap me out of that headspace. “You can’t pour from an empty cup” and “a rising tide lifts all ships”. You owe it to yourself, and the wider world, to take good care of yourself.

@hilariousnamehere thanks for sharing your joy, that sounds blissful. You can’t beat a catch-up with an old friend in my book. Especially if there are squidgy baby cuddles involved!

I am feeling much better today, thanks to a restorative night of sleep and a very restful day. I’ve realised my problem is I just push too hard all the time and have unrealistic expectations of myself. Quite possibly a predicament most of us are dealing with I suspect.

I hope we all feel brighter soon. xx

queenrollo · 27/01/2022 07:39

@moregarlic I'm not really sure about detoxing, I've never been into anything as extreme as juicing (I don't have a juicer either!) but I am prone to falling to too much sugar and unhealthy 'treats' so i think for now I am going to clean up my diet, up the fruit and definitely the water. And take more regular epsom baths. I also bought a couple of new herbal teas to bring into my daily routine.

Yesterday my youngest DS complained of a sore throat when we picked him up from school. We had a disturbed night (we also have a bedwetting alarm, which is a whole other problem) and then at 6am he appeared in our bedroom with his wastebin in hand - and promptly threw up into it. So I have him home, that will be today and tomorrow. I'm going to cancel plans on Saturday, just in case the rest of us are contagious as I don't want to pass it to friends. It also means no gym for me tomorrow, and I lost last week to my impending migraine so I am a bit fed up about that.

speakout · 27/01/2022 08:44

I can’t imagine the crushing responsibility of being a carer for an elderly relative / relatives with MH issues.

Most of the time I manage to reframe my life in a more positive way thankfully. I appreciate your empathy. But being crushed is not something on my to do list.
I live in a largeish house surrounded by forest, no financial worries, a good OH, an amazing daughter. I have time to go to yoga most days, I rarely get ill and feel fit. My MH gives me no real cause for concern, I run a profitable little business that I love.
I do have own times and bad weeks, but mostly manage to hold firm and find joy.
queenrollo I am sorry you are still feeling unwell and your DS too. I hpoe you are bothe feeling better soon.
It is frustrating having to cancel gym sessions- I get that too.
Again it's about balance, doing what we can, when we can, finding compassion. I sometimes wonder what my life would have been like if I had stayed single or had no children, gone to live far away , avoided all the drama, all the tears, the testing times.
But they may have come in a different form, or perhaps not at all.
And I wouldn't be who I am, now- with a toolbox full of fixings for myself and others, I wouldn;t have come to truly understand the depths I do of being human. My sword wouldn't be so sharp and my heart would not be so fearless.
Cowering in a cabin may feel comfortable, but ultimately teaches us very little about life, ourselves and others.
( sounds pretty good for retirement though!)

OP posts:
AnotherCrazyBirdLady · 27/01/2022 10:13

@moregarlic, wise words, I have never heard 'a rising tide lifts all ships', but I really resonate with it - life can be stormy at times! Thank you.
@queenrollo, oh no, I really hope your DS feels better very soon, and it's not too taxing for you all. My own DS complained of feeling sick, but has duly gone to work. They have LFT testing on site, so fingers crossed it's just one of those things that pass.
@speakout, I often try to imagine what my life would be like without all the testing times, but I can't, and am pretty glad I went through it all, it has taught me valuable lessons about myself. I just love how you say 'my sword wouldn't be so sharp and my heart would not be so fearless' - I'm sure it rings true for us all.

A bit more sunshine today, and I have popped out to pick up some bits and pieces for the week ahead. I'm still bone-tired, but am sleeping like a rock, eating well and practising daily yoga. I suspect hormones may be at play, but have also noticed I am wearing my shoulders up by my ears! I shall address this swiftly.
Have a wonderful day, all, and may your loads lighten as does the sky xxx