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I had to take our family rescue dog back to the rescue after 5 years

129 replies

Rara123jam · 13/10/2019 20:01

Sorry about the length of this I just need to get it out noone seems to understand how I am feeling .I took our dog back to the rescue last week after 5 years and I'm absolutely broken ! My kids ds (9) and dd(6) are coping so much better then me . I know I have done the right thing . Since becoming a single mum earlier this year and having to work, I just didnt have enough time for him anymore and he (fluffy) was on his own to much and wasnt getting enough attetion or walks.
I feel so guilty and worried for him. How scared he must be. He was my best friend like my 3rd child and my shadow when we were togethor. I miss him so much I'm so worried he will be left at the rescue without a new family for ages.
My friends think im overreacting and tell me I need to just get on with it. I dont really no what i want from this thread, I suppose just someone who understands and has any advice
But please no negativity I already feel rubbish enough 😭

OP posts:
Oliversmumsarmy · 14/10/2019 09:53

how can you say I done it for my benefit! What benefit have I got from it

The benefit of not having to walk him, feed him, look after him.

Didn't want to say what Cavendish said but is the rescue a no kill place.

Is he still there? Find it strange they didn't ask you about him.

MarthasGinYard · 14/10/2019 09:58

Your kids aren't that bothered too by the sounds of it.

Can only imagine how my dd 9 would be if we did this with her rescue cat and we've only had him 2 years.

PickwickThePlockingDodo · 14/10/2019 10:10

Your kids aren't that bothered too by the sounds of it.

Good point, most kids would be devastated. Wonder why? 🤔

MaybeDoctor · 14/10/2019 10:18

I am not a dog person and will probably never have a dog, but there seems to be a theme on this thread of single parents struggling to keep dogs once a relationship breaks down.

Where the hell are ex-spouses and partners in all this? Don't they share some of the responsibility too?

MissDew · 14/10/2019 10:42

I've worked in an animal rescue/rehoming centre. The turnover for adopted cats was about three weeks i.e. that was the longest a healthy cat would wait to be rehomed/adopted.

As a volunteer it was my job to clean their pens every day then brush and comb the cats if required. Basically, present the cats and the rehoming centre to prospective adopters.

There was an adoption fee to be paid for each cat by the new owners which they did willingly.

There were also dogs to be rehomed. They had a larger out door pen to run in which had new, fresh wood pulp delivered regularly i.e. when they had flattened the shredded softwood from the running about. They slept in a comfortable kennel every night. Again, it didn't take long for a new owner to turn up and adopt them.

I'm aghast/open mouthed at the shit being thrown at the OP. If a child needed to be removed due to their needs not being met well that would be all well and good.

Do that to a dog and there's five pages of utter c*ery going on.

A pp pointed out it's a dog that is used to a family environment. At the age of six it's, ok not young but not old either.

Could the OP contact the rehoming centre in a couple of weeks' time and ask if Fluffy got a new home ?

(We had to re-home a cat because we were moving overseas. We gave him to a couple who are as soft as butter and dotty about cats. The cat would have been anxious with the new owners until about breakfast on the second day. When he realised he was on a good billet with them he would probably think, 'you mean I could have had this all along ?'

Oh yeah, btw, when horses get sold, for whatever reason there's not all this shit thrown at the old owner, is there ?

Lurknessmonster · 14/10/2019 10:58

OP you did the right thing for you. It's just a dog, why are other posters getting so worked up and emotional. Calm down

MissDew · 14/10/2019 10:59

For the record if a cat got a weepy eye or any other sign of not being well they would be put into the clinic/hospital at the rehoming centre so they could get better. Yes really.

Before being returned to their pen in a good, healthy condition for a prospective adopter to see.

There was also a feline maternity unit there. All the pregnant and nursing cats had a higher level of care. They also let the kittens play with each other as part of socialisation. Staff and volunteers would go and play with the kittens.

The practices and protocols for cleanliness, feeding of the animals ete etc at the rehoming centre were meticulous.

Each cat had it's own pen. In the pen was a basket with a blanket for it to sleep on. A little 'cat house' on an upper level for it to hide in should it want to. A water bowl that was replenished all day. A feeding bowl twice daily cat food. Toys and a clean litter tray (feline ensuite.)

There was more toys around the outside of the pens, water bowls more clean litter trays. There was also a ten inch square of cat grass for them if they needed to chomp on some grass. This is for the cats because they would allowed out of their pens but behind locked doors to play at night.

A radio would be playing to make it seem more homely in the day.

MarthasGinYard · 14/10/2019 11:00

'It's just a dog,'

Sadly it was

Some of us feel differently about our rescues.

gonewiththerain · 14/10/2019 11:03

The children have probably moved house, possibly schools, gone from 2 parents at home to just one and all lot of other changes.
It wasn’t the ops fault she can’t afford the dog maybe dog maintenance should be paid
As pp said no one bothers when horses are sold and some of them are very upset about moving.
I’ve got two old retired working dogs, one arrived when he was 11 and the other at 8. They settled in fine and plenty of people want an older dog, I’m one of them. Can’t be doing with the puppy stage.

freetony · 14/10/2019 11:20

If put myself in your shoes I would be heartbroken too.

But if you can't afford him then yes he would be better off and if he's a well trained family dog he should have no problem finding a new home.

Perpetuallyperplexed27 · 14/10/2019 11:24

Such an unpleasant thread to read. Some of you ought to be ashamed.

OP is dealing with marriage breakdown and adapting to life as a single working mum. It's not easy. She's said how guilty and upset she feels. What is the point in these comments other than to make her feel even worse?

Oliversmumsarmy · 14/10/2019 11:41

gonewiththerain freetony

The main problem was time not money.

EleanorReally · 14/10/2019 11:49

You took him to the right place op

youjustcantwin · 14/10/2019 11:56

This is what happens when judgey fuckers go on and on to people about providing 5 star care for dogs. Must take to doggy day care, must have constant attention, must have dog walker, must sleep on your bed, have its own couch!! Ffs if OP had posted and said she is leaving dog alone whilst she works, is a single parent and can't afford a dog walker or have time to walk the dog EVERYONE would have pounced on her. Now she tries to do what's best for her family and the dog and she gets pounced on! If people didn't keep harping on about treating dogs better than your own kids and giving people such high expectations to live up to them there wouldn't be so many dogs abandoned in centres. Bloody hell not many people can afford doggy day care and dog walkers. Get real and get off her case

MissDew · 14/10/2019 12:02

Get real and get off her case

This^ In spades.

FoodWoes · 14/10/2019 12:02

Well said @youjustcantwin

Helmetbymidnight · 14/10/2019 12:14

I agree.

Take care, OP. It sounds like you're going through a really tough time. Flowers

Wolfff · 14/10/2019 13:32

OP you did what was best in the long term for the dog and your family. Sorry you are sad, but it was for the best outcome.

Some of the posts on here are vile. How about supporting the OP who is going through a tough time rather than putting the boot in. Would you be as horrible in real life.

RatherBeRiding · 22/10/2019 16:32

Oh yeah, btw, when horses get sold, for whatever reason there's not all this shit thrown at the old owner, is there ?

A horse is not a dog. Just saying. My dogs live in my house with me. My horses live in a field. Horses are domesticated animals but they are not "pets" in the same way that dogs are. Well, mine are to some extent but if I go away for a week or so they don't pine for me and look out for me the way the dogs do. I keep all my animals for life and have made sure that I am financially able to do so. If I couldn't, I wouldn't have got them.

There are responsible animal/pet owners, and then there are the rest.

pinlot5 · 27/10/2019 05:53

I hope you took him to a definite, No-kill rescue. Strange they didn't want to ask you his vaccination history. Hope he lived. He must have known what you were doing. Just for not time enough for walking??Don't think you're a true dog lover. Poor dog.

Aprillygirl · 27/10/2019 06:07

This made me cry. Dog must be so bewildered, scared and sad. Sorry OP but you could have walked him early morning and again in the evening. Poor Fluffy Sad

Calledyoulastnightfromglasgow · 27/10/2019 06:19

I do feel for these animals though. When we take them on, it’s for life barring serious illness/being incapacitated/poverty.

Could you not have paid a dog walker a few days per week?

Calledyoulastnightfromglasgow · 27/10/2019 06:20

Vaccinations - these are irrelevance after the first few years. But dumping a dog? I would only do that it utterly desperate

oooohcarriewhite · 27/10/2019 06:41

I don't know your circumstances at all, only going by what is here.
You say you split up with your husband, could he not have helped with walking the dog as presumably he was also his dog. Apologies if this is massively unreasonable.

I really want you to go and get your dog back.
This is so so sad. I can't imagine taking a loved pet to kennels.
I couldn't put my pets in for a night never mind abandoning them.
He will be so sad and lonely and scared.

oooohcarriewhite · 27/10/2019 06:48

What was Fluffy a pointer cross with ?
Can you post a pic of Fluffy ?

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