A Viscous Attack #4

[Whosthetabbynow]

Here we are on the fourth instalment of crazy misspellings, misuse of words and all the other topsy-turvy attempts at literacy from the illiterate.
Post your observations. Lady’s the flaw is youre’s…

I'll have you know, I'm one of the leaders of the Pedants' Revolt, @AlbieJiggered However, unfortunately, both my eyesight and my brainpower and memory are diminishing and when I checked about kerb and curb before posting, I thought I was looking at an English dictionary, not an American one. Never mind, with any luck I'll remember correctly in future. (Not that likely, given how I am very nearly "sans eyes, sans teeth, sans taste, sans everything" already.)

I have absolutely no idea what that means, not being a chemist I live in a perpetual state of curbed enthusiasm, mark you.

Ha ha it means hitting the kerb (pavement edge) with your car wheel(s) and damaging the alloy wheel(s). It can be an expensive misjudgment.

I love how English can be played with, creating verbs out of nouns.

I've never kerbed my alloys.

Meddling is one thing, medalling another.
On MN cyclists peddle.

I don’t role out of bed until at least 8am.

Seen today on MN: "I've taught a few Esther's and ..."

I don't usually comment about grammar on a thread but I will if a poster claims to be a teacher. I used to be a teacher and would have pointed out errors to a colleague. My old headteacher used to read every report or letter that was sent out. A couple of times she found typos in mine and once asked me to change a comma - I didn’t agree but did what she said. I have read some atrocious grammar in letters from my grandchildren's schools.

There was a teacher on a thread here a while back who insisted 'should of' was correct. She was rightly jumped on.

When my sons were at primary school they used to bring home letters that were littered with errors. I used to correct them with red pen and send them back.

I saw to all intense purposes the other day

Role up at the waste, shurely?

light wait hover
a nawing pain

There oversized any you get a drought up them

... traffic was moving supper slow ...

Yes! I never went that far, but my favourite was on the lunch menu for the week ahead, which stated that alongside the main options, bread rolls and crudities were always available. The dinner ladies did have a bit of a fierce reputation!

My manager at work would send round a list of food items for staff to bring for the Christmas buffet and she always made sure she brought the crudities. Year after year I corrected it to no avail.

Can I add 'Slimmers World' to the mix?

Not apostrophes. Just a friend who's been going to Slimming World (that's a whole other issue lol) for years but still calls it SLIMMERS World.

Soda, ottoman and 2 chairs

DELIBERATELY maligning others with reality TV misinformation with malice of forethought?

I’m sorry to report that this greeted me in the Talk roundup email this morning. 😢

Brilliant

Que?

Someone is going through a ‘divource’

Labou minister left squirming on Sky News - 'you can't tell people the truth!'

Sorry, what?

Sofa?

Typo - D and F are adjacent keys - but I thought it was amusing.