In the vein of "Chester draws"

[ShatnersWoodwind]

On a local selling page:

"Chabby Chique bedside tables".

😂

I know, especially my neighbour, considering she works at the place and must see it written down so much! Mind you, she also says chimbley instead of chimney.

Yeah, I don't think they realise "balling" is American slang for having sex!!!

“Gorgeous smelling men’s colon for sale”

(cologne)

This is the best 😂😂

I think it's ok when, as in that case, it's used to indicate a hasty acquisition.

I've noticed (a lot, recently) that people have no idea how to use speech marks, or parentheses.

I see, far too often, an open bracket, but no closed bracket.

Also - someone will write 'she said i should see a doctor', sometimes 'she said "I should see a doctor" or 'she said "I should see a doctor and I said I don't need to so I didn't but...and..... - It's hard to know who is saying what, and who should be seeing the doctor!

Only this morning I read an OP which included 2 examples of could-OF and a later post revealed that the OP is a teacher! I wonder if there is a link between bad/terrible SPAG and teachers? ]

I have been annoyed about this too!!!!

Yes I mentioned this too. It’s fine used to describe a hasty acquisition but not if it’s used to ask someone for lunch or in the many other
contexts in which it’s inappropriate
and jarring.

My parents and siblings are dyslexic so I’ve lived with this all my life. One thing I’ve noticed is that dyslexics seem to read the gist of the word so much easier than I do. I just read the spelling, and if it’s spelled correctly I’ll automatically know what it means, if not then I’m often stumped. They don’t think like that; they read the sounds, the spelling is irrelevant. So they can understand each other on the family group chat much faster than I can.

Many years ago, spoken, the liqueur 'Tina Maria'.

Haven't read all through yet so sorry if it's been said. Covid time, news bulletin talking about vaccines, 'subtitles' came up with Extra Vinegar one night. (Astra Zeneca). It was probably corrected by next morning but raised a smile at the time.

There was a thread the other day where the OP (who turned out to be a troll) claimed she had a “Bachelors in education”, yet couldn’t tell the difference between “to” and “too”. More like Batchelor’s Cup-a-Soup.

My mum replaces decrepit with decrapid which I actually prefer!

This is the best one - I might adopt it "A wrestler's night"

I knew someone who said 'bolivious' instead of oblivious. Made me think of Bolivia everytime 😂 She said it more often than anyone needs to actually say oblivious.

My ex wanted a mirrow for the hallway.

My mum, who prided herself on her good education and her excellent spelling and grammar, used to think it was Convent Garden and art decor.
She got really angry with me when I politely corrected her on both. Silence when she looked both up and realised her mistakes!

It makes me think of Bovril!

😂 wrestlers night wins for me so far

Obviously this one is deliberate, but the thread reminded me 😄

Yikes! I've just had my mind blown today! I was so sure the lyrics said "what's she gonna look like with a cherry nade on her".

Seriously. I'll explain. In the video the OW is licking what looks to be one of those glace' cherries in a toothpick on a drink. The word 'chimney' the way she sang it, sounded like 'cherry' or 'cherry nade'/'cherry-nade. So I assumed it was a reference to the singer tipping the drink on her, hence "what's she gonna look like with a cherry-nade on her".

I had NO...IDEA, until I read your post and googled it, that it was "chimney".

I still say my version is better and makes much more sense - a woman tipping a drink on the OW, rather than a chimney.

Gets my coat and leaves, red-faced and cringing. 😳

She was almost correct. Covent Garden was originally occupied by the Benedictine monks of Westminster Abbey who maintained a garden there. It was originally the ‘convent garden’.

It's Covent Garden now, not Convent, so she was incorrect.

O thanks !

I know the origin of Son of a gun
and
pull your finger out

being maritime quotes, but didn’t know the toe the line,
though thought it must be disciplinary, thank you

Friends from Derby say mirrow !
I always thought it was a localism,
same as borrow me, morrve, (mauve)
knocking on the back door when its propped wide open and we shout ‘come in’
seeyasavvy to alert a post luncheon visit and
‘heyup me ducks’ as an informal greeting