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Original poster

Weddings- what would you do differntly?

32 replies

PinkMartini · 30/01/2008 14:48

My little sister is getting married.

We've already shared the things we did wrong when we got married (I wouldn't bother inviting every last second cousin, I would panic LESS and enjoy the day MORE and make sure the photographer had a full list of the shots we
need for "the mantelpiece" etc)

I saw a great thread in good housekeeping about expensive kitchens and learning from others' mistakes and wondered if I could pick your brains on this one:

What about you? What do you wish you'd done differently with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight?

TIA
PMartini and sister

OP posts:
GreatAuntieWurly · 30/01/2008 14:52

get caterers in. We catered ourselves, bought an extra freezer which we kept in my mums shed and bought food in the months leading up to the day. That was all fine until we realised a week before how are we gonna keep it all cold overnight??? my brother pulled in a favour and borrowed a refigerated van from a friend so we was sorted but it was such hard work.

GreatAuntieWurly · 30/01/2008 14:53

wedding cake like they have in america where its served as dessert - we had loads of bloody wedding cake left over, no-one seems to like fruit cake except for all the nans.

Wisteria · 30/01/2008 14:56

Not bothered and spent the little money we had on a holiday!

Sorry, that's not helpful....

If I had to get married then the way we did it was ok and didn't break the bank - did our own food (far nicer), hired village hall, spent money on decent booze and didn't expect anyone to pay for it. Made my own cake, and bought a sale bridesmaid's dress for £75 and 'modded' it up with lace, dh wore a nice recycleable suit.

The whole thing came in at under £2k and we invited as many people as we wanted.

TheBestMum · 30/01/2008 15:02

Would have got a professional videographer in, as asked brother to do it & was crap at it. Thing ran out of battery as he just kept it recording the floor/his shoes whilst chatting to people he vaguley knew.
No speeches/first dance recorded. Knob.

gemmiegoatlegs · 30/01/2008 15:08

my wedding was great and didn't cost a fortune either. The only thing i can maybe add is having someone gag my mother as her chattering on totally stressed me out!

hanaflower · 30/01/2008 15:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chicaguapa · 07/02/2008 17:05

What I would do again is we had a tiny ceremony with just immediate family (I didn't want to feel nervous in front of lots of people) before lunch then DH & I went off for lunch together on our own. We then invited everyone including friends to the evening reception at 4pm. We also had a live band which was miles better than a ropey DJ.

I would have not had a sit down meal and would have had a buffet instead. And our wedding cake cost a fortune and no-one can even remember what it looked like! I would also have paid for a photographer instead of relying on copies of friends' photos.

Most importantly I'd remember that it's YOUR wedding and not everyone will share your joy as if it was their own.

MinkVelvet · 07/02/2008 17:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MinkVelvet · 07/02/2008 17:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cornsilk · 07/02/2008 17:13

Would have invited more friends to the day. Would have not invited aunts and uncles who we don't ever see to please parents.

Bellie · 07/02/2008 17:13

I would have had a live band instead of a disco.

I would have invited more friends that family that both mothers insisted we needed to invite.

I would have made a list of photos rather than trying to remember on the day.

I would have told my (then future) MIL to stop trying to live her dream wedding that she didn't have though me, rather than agreeing to some of her requests - e.g. sugared almond favours etc etc etc ..

slug · 07/02/2008 17:16

I wouldn't be pregnant so this time I could drink!!

Apart from that, I'd confirm the car both the day before and in the morning so they would actually turn up this time and not unhelpfully be offered one "In about an hour and a half luv" (on the upside, I realised there is absolutly nothing wrong with going to your wedding on the bus)

OverMyDeadBody · 07/02/2008 17:21

not get married

LittleFairySmile · 07/02/2008 17:25

Weddings are individual, but IMO invite only people you care about and who care about you, and make sure you get the photos/video you want. They are your memory of the day.

Also, forget the expensive wedding breakfast, because nobody eats the buffet when they've only just had a large meal, so just go for the buffet (it helps if you get married at around 2pm, then everyone has lunch before the wedding anyway) but make sure you get a good photographer and/or videographer.

Maidamess · 07/02/2008 17:34

I'd wear a push up bra. I'd lost a lot of weight and my boobs looked like poached eggs.

My flowers were wrong wrong wrong. the florist had used the wrong type of euclyptus leaf. (Luckily I didn't have an attack of the vapours, and I think I was the only one who noticed)

I didn't know/like quite a few of the people there!

Everything else was lovely.

welshmum · 07/02/2008 17:37

I would have a completely over the top frock. I had a relatively simple one that my friend (who was making it) said would suit me far more but how I wish I'd had a corset with yards of tulle and a sparkly tiara.
I would have let my sister choose her own bridesmaid dress instead of making her look like a deckchair.
Was a lovely day though, lovely, lovely

MinkVelvet · 07/02/2008 20:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hairtwiddler · 07/02/2008 20:23

I wouldn't have bothered with the photographer. The formal shots were terrible and I only liked the ones friends and family had taken.
Or I would have done more research into finding a photographer.
Less hairspray.
Better system for playing music during register signing.
All petty stuff. Otherwise, not a thing. It was fab.

PanicPants · 07/02/2008 20:27

What a great thread {{PP scribbles down ideas}}

lennygrrl · 07/02/2008 20:29

Message withdrawn

StressTeddy · 07/02/2008 20:31

I would not do my first wedding again!!
My second, I would repeat in an instant

Christmas wedding
Had one bridesmaid
Both had dresses made (black and white)
Perfect day
Only 40 people
More friends than family
Married the love of my life

Good luck to your lil sister - may she and her intended have an amazing day
(Think you are lovely for doing this thread on her behalf btw pinkmartini)

MegBusset · 07/02/2008 20:35

I would not let random relative of DH's, who invited herself despite having nothing to do with DH, come. Then she wouldn't have been drunk by 2pm, heckled DH and the best man through their speeches, spent the whole day insulting people and ended up in the middle of the pub shouting "You're all a bunch of f-ing c-s".

Other than that, I'd do it all exactly the same!

StressTeddy · 07/02/2008 20:36

Oh, one thing I would have done differently is introduce a lot more people to each other than I did. I kind of assumed it was happening and don't think it did as much as I would have liked

UniversallyChallenged · 07/02/2008 20:38

I would NOT get married in August - when you want an anniversary break away it's the most expensive time so you end up not bothering! I would choose May or June - lovely weather still and cheap

apart from that would do it all just the same in a heartbeat

mazzystar · 07/02/2008 20:39

keep it simpler
and smaller. it was pretty low key but i would have gone for less is more on the guest front
remember to put on my false eyelashes
not worry about it all so much beforehand!

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