Anyone want to contribute to a special 40th birthday wanky basket for Enid...

[CountessDracula]

I will be putting in

A trowel (with which to plaster on her orange make-up to hide wrinkles, Boots make-up counter woman stylee)

A crochet hook (for making antimacassars and the like as her hair will get greasier with age)

Some reading glasses (cheap 99p ones from superdrug)

Groan, I'm 40 very soon too (11 days left of my 30's). Still, trying to see the funny side.

season ticket to the bingo
Nivea cream in the flat blue tin
Zip-up fleecy all-in-one babygro type garment for after the bath - so much better than draughty dressing gowns

any perfume by lentheric.

apple blossom talc by yardley.

orange coloured knee high tights that keep falling down to end up in a crinkley pile round ankles

tartan shopping trolley.

daily mail delivered daily.

granny sookers

pulley for the hall

see through rain cap

tea cosy

god my gran does nivea cream in the bucket sized blue pots!

lots of xmas gift ideas here, thanks girls

new bath with door for easy access and/or bath seat

Imperial Leather soap and talc set

Stannah stairlift

Oh, and one of those scooter things with a really loud horn to make people jump out of the way.

Some fur lined zip up tartan slippers and a hair net.

Some poise pads

A pair of these, so her bunions don't bother her too much

well done marthamoo, they are hideous!!!!!!!!!!

A voucher for a Saga holiday

fluffy hot water bottle cover (actually, I'd like one of those )

Some Yorkshire mixture boiled sweeties - happy to send you some down if you CAT me

An african violet plant (hideous, but you always see them in old people's homes)

A budgie

A nice set of embroidered hankies
Knitted toilet roll cover like a doll in a dress
A pot dog

This is an ideal opportunity to off-load (I me pass on to a good home) one of my MIL's Christmas presents. Happy Birthday Enid, I hope you enjoy your pink, towelling, embroidered, fridge-door-handle covers.

ponds cold cream and pop socks from me and for a treat a packet of greens creme caramel

rofl

will read tomorrow when sober but particularly pmsl @ marina n foxy (My Floradix Shame)