Thread 50 - Covid GCSE Cohort - New Year of Adulting

[OrangeSpicedBun]

2024 here we are... our young people are still getting used to adulting and we're still doing that adulting thing ...it's tough !

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.
Previous thread
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/parents_of_adult_children/4922401-thread-49-covid-gcse-cohort-the-nights-are-drawing-in?page=10

Fabulous Piggy, good on him.

Congrats @Piggywaspushed DS!

That’s great @Piggywaspushed ! Will he be staying bin Brum all summer? I agree with @Shimy that work experience is so important. Dd is going to stay in Notts for a few weeks after her exams to do her caring job, but that’s more motivated by money needs than experience!

On and off, yes. He's got the job at Edgbaston, too.

True story : he turned up for his first shift two weeks early....

We’ve just dropped DS back at school for his final term (he’s a weekly boarder, term starts tomorrow). He has A-levels. Really not looking forward to doing that again! He’s got work experience lined up at Unilever, and a chemistry summer school in Newcastle. Hopefully he’ll also get a job around that and save some money.

DD is back at university, and has exams coming up. After which she’s finished until September. I’m sure my summer terms were longer than that!

LOL shiny, think the It's A Knockout reference might have passed you by.

There are two Stuart Halls. The guy that presented It's A Knockout in the 70s. And the eminent Birmingham based and very very woke sociologist!

@PhotoDad maybe I should DM you, but St Salvator's choir is the main one at St A. DS was a choral scholar in the St Leonard's Choir, sadly no bass vacancies in his year by the time his offer came through, they need to audition around Christmas before they start for the best chance of getting in. Sallies goes on tour internationally and sings every Sunday and for all the graduations and big events - They were invited to sing for Queen's Jubilee event in London. Also a great Madrigals Choir and "The Other Guys", all to be found on YouTube.

If DS had not been in a Covid year he would have done more singing - his first year was all solo singing with 4 singers for each service, but at least they were live on Youtube, which was nice for distant relatives. As a comprehensive school boy he did find them very posh though, said some were like caricatures!

Well done @Piggywaspushed DS! Hope he has moved into the house with nice housemates by the time he starts.

@craggyrat - ouch, expensive, but at least it is done!

@Piggywaspushed I have vague memories of such a show, but left the U.K in the 70s as a child so you're right, that reference did pass me by Oh well,. Here's to internships and the great Stuart Hall!!

@EffortlessDistraction It is suggested £7 billion pa unclaimed disability benefits and discretionary support:
https://policyinpractice.co.uk/missing-out-2024/

Thanks @EwwSprouts that's interesting reading. I'm not surprised TBH, if someone like me (NT, articulate, able to source help) finds it overwhelming I'm not at all surprised so many fail to claim what they would be eligible for. My relative used to work as a charity advisor supporting people to claim benefits and has much to say on the matter.

@OublietteBravo has your DS applied for chemistry degrees? That's my subject. Sounds like he's got some good things lined up there.

Well done to all the others with work, internships etc sorted out. DS has two more weeks of full on work and then he can do some more jobhunting for the summer.

I used to LOVE It's A Knockout, I wa horrified when the truth about that Stuart Hall came out

Ds has had a personality transplant! He has filled in his calendar with exact page numbers to revise each day, to ensure he finishes each subject and he’s even set aside days for past papers. This is ds with ADHD who has never planned ahead for anything in his life 😮 It’s a shame this has kicked in so late and his appalling attendance means he’s having to teach himself half of the content, but who knows, maybe he might do ok?

He made me laugh - having not really done any assessed work at all throughout 6th form (teachers don’t seem to enforce homework?!), he sent a completed exam question to his Business teacher on Sat night and was incensed that he hadn’t marked it and replied by Sunday evening 🤣 I did remind him that it was the weekend!

He’s also written to his Tesco manager to say his shift patterns are ‘inhibiting the efficiency of his revision’ and requested to work weekends only until the end of A Levels 🤣😮

@crazycrofter DS2 also has ADHD and struggled throughout school but towards the end of GCSE i think he had had enough of being disorganised. I think they come to the realisation that unless they do something differently, they will be in a constant state of anxiety. Just like your DS, he developed a very meticulous system, from his class notes to using different pens to underline key things, label diagrams etc to timetabling etc. It worked for him and he still does it now at uni. Everyone was shocked at how exceptionally organised he has become. Unfortunately, this hasn't extended to his room or his laundry! it's still shockingly chaotic as ever.

@OublietteBravo Wishing your DS good luck as he finishes off at boarding. It's so exciting for them once exams are over. Outings, barbecue, etc time goes so fast.

That’s interesting @shimy! Weirdly ds has always had a very tidy room! He’s actually also started to take action with things instead of burying his head in the sand - ringing the bank about a fraudulent payment, booking annual leave etc. I think he’s realised that if he wants to have a worthwhile gap year he will need to be organised, so he’s practising!

Good for him @crazycrofter especially with the fraud one . I was really anxious last yr when DS started applying for placements. The organising, the assessments, the deadline, the remote interviews and all the timings involved but he managed to nail all of them. It's a tough thing for them to manage. DS procrastinates a lot but has managed to get all his work done on time except the Easter ones he is doing which he is going to use his extension time for, for the 1st time, he even managed to book his driving test today!

Not surprised one bit Crazy about your boy getting it together :) He’s always been incredibly resourceful.

Also best wishes to all of you with YP entering or about to start their exam cycle, GCSEs, A levels or year end assessments.

DD just has a couple language exams this week and is then done. She sounds so much lighter, and has managed to pack a scheduled summer full of travel and different work experiences, I think there may be 4 random weeks out of 4 months sitting vacant right now.

I laughed at your random vacant weeks @ealingwestmum . That was my one job over the Easter break - to find a single week over the summer that was free for DS (just doing his finals), DD (summer job and possible holiday with friends), DH (full time job very much tied to compulsory meetings which have been in the diary for 18months) and me (very flexible job, but several choir concerts).
I found one period of 7 days, Wednesday to Wednesday, between mid May to the beginning of September when we were all free! We're booked for Majorca 😁. I'm guessing it's likely to be the last holiday with just the four of us 😢.

It's fun, but a little intimidating reading all your positive news. Many congratulations on all the successful internships. What a wonderful achievement for them all. They all sound very busy over the holidays.

We've not booked anything yet as DD has her hand op.- hopefully ... but we have no date yet - just a pre-op assessment at the beginning of July.
DS2 finishes his A levels towards the end of June so we will have to wait. By which time the holidays will all be rather expensive. Though ds2 is going overseas with a group of friends in July to celebrate the end of his exams.

DS & DD have both secured rental accommodation. DD just yesterday in London ( bit late), but very convenient for Ucl. Ds is right in the centre of Guildford, so will hopefully pick up a job there.

@Crazycrofter I'm glad your ds is so organised now. Time seems to stand still a bit at this stage doesn't it? Ds is plodding on & is in his final round of mocks. He still has only 2 offers for Psychology & hasn't heard from Bristol or Bath. He's working at school until 8 most days but doesn't like to work ( apart from regular tests) at weekends.

Ds1 seems to have settled alright into the first year again. It was tricky joining into a new year in February but he's been ok, made friends, joined a gym, taken his car down there & has found a flat with a friend. As a person with dyslexia & pretty bad ADHD he's starting to get himself together. I'm not sure he's doing much work but he is attending his practicals etc. and he's organising & planning ahead. I think an internship may still be a little beyond him though.

Oh that’s a win Seeline, I’m sure it won’t actually be your last either!

Sounds like ds1 is doing really well @Cantonet . I hope he gets through year 1 successfully. Your ds2 must be working hard if he's at school for such long days. Dd gave up on Bath for Psychology in the end, as they hadn't offered by April, so she just accepted two of her other offers for firm and insurance. Which offers does he have?

Dd went through her summer calendar at the weekend @ealingwestmum and she's home for maybe 4 or 5 weekends over July-September!

Well done to your ds @shimy for managing all that! He's doing really well.

@Crazycrofter ds has got offers from Sheffield & Loughborough. I loved Sheffield when we did the open day but Loughborough is a complete unknown.
He's quite highly ranked apparently & all I know is that its a campus uni. He doesn't really drink or go to nightclubs, so it might suit him. But I think he might need a gap year to be honest. I think we found out the hard way with ds1 that with ADHD maturity takes a while to develop. He can't even remember to take his ADHD pills unless I give them to him.
Plus he's clueless with money. Ds1 was driving him to appointments in the holiday & I had to give him the money for DS2.

I've not been to either of those places @cantonet, but I get the impression that life at Loughborough is very much campus based, so maybe a better introduction to independent living? I would encourage a gap year too; I can't really see any down sides and it will give him the chance to develop some of the more practical skills he'll need.

I hope the assessment leads to some prompt and positive action for your DD Cantonet, injuries can take such long term mental toll on them. Glad the accom got sorted and 🤞for upcoming exams.

Thank you @ealingwestmum .
I'm not so sure it's taken a toll on her, but she hasn't been able to play any sports.
The only thing she's done is skiing & she's normally incredibly sporty. But saying that the Architecture course has taken up all of her time.

It's just been very inconvenient having a non-working thumb, especially when building models. Plus having to clear the summer for a possible op & a long recovery phase is a bit painful. She hates staying at home & loves London & travelling. So hey ho Summer will be fun 😄