Thread 50 - Covid GCSE Cohort - New Year of Adulting

[OrangeSpicedBun]

2024 here we are... our young people are still getting used to adulting and we're still doing that adulting thing ...it's tough !

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.
Previous thread
https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/parents_of_adult_children/4922401-thread-49-covid-gcse-cohort-the-nights-are-drawing-in?page=10

Yes, good luck to all the exam / driving test takers. DS only has one exam this year and that was before Christmas, he is back to lectures this week but no more assignments due till March I don't think, then there are several in quick succession over Easter as there were over Christmas.

Thank you for the new thread, I had completely dropped off the last one, I just felt everyone else's news sounded so exciting and i had nothing interesting to post. It was also a difficult end of yr for us at home and didn't want to always post depressing news. Saying that, I did spend Xmas and new yr in hospital and only just discharged last week. Lost a stone in weight and now a pack of bones. So much for eating a healthy diet all yr and trying to keep the weight off.

I don't know if I posted to say DS had some amazing offers for industrial placements for this yr but I'm so glad the juggling act of applying for placements and keeping up with academics has come to a triumphant end and he can now focus on his studies properly and enjoy some socialising again.

DS came home this weekend (had to go back to uni whilst i was in hospital) so that was very exciting as he didn't tell me till Friday. It was just so nice the four of us together in our home and ds gives lots of hugs!!!
He's got 2 exams this yr and he's done. His band of 8 friends from yr1 that he moved in with for yr 2 has sadly dwindled down to 3 (it had all fractured since the assault). Next yr they are all planning to live separately although of course DS won't be around anyway.

Good luck to all those doing driving tests and other exams.

Thanks for new thread and the mention from @JustHereWithMyPopcorn or I might never have found it.
Fortunately no law exam for DS today but good look to those who do. He had two last week which he managed okay thanks to extra time. I so wish he'd had support in place previously. I'm taking him back to Nottingham later today with mixed feelings. We haven't sorted his sleeping issues out as I'd hoped but he does have counselling booked so fingers crossed that helps the sleeping. I've really enjoyed having him home and will miss him.
DD has been back in Wales for two weeks and still has a week before lectures start. She has all but one of her first semester marks back and is doing great. She's most proud of getting a first for her contribution to seminars where she constantly gets talked over by some some obnoxious boys with huge egos.

DS1 had an exam last week which is taken by all medical students at Manchester, from Y1 to Y5. Seems very odd to me, obviously the first years get very low marks, and pass marks go up for the higher years. Seems a bit disheartening to me if you go into an exam knowing that 25% is all you can expect to achieve - they are multiple choice, so should statistically get 20% with no knowledge. He said it was very hard.

@mummyinbeds well done to your DD! Is it your DS's sleeping patterns that are the issue or too much/little sleep?

@Monkey2001 that exam sounds entirely pointless. What is it suppose to show? Oh look, you don't know aaaannnnyyy of this, aren't you silly little first years. Very odd.

Sorry to hear you've had a rough time of it, Shimy. Hope things improve from here on in and that you make a good recovery. Lots of cake is my prescription for weight gain!

@Shimy sorry to hear you've been so poorly. Take care of yourself

@mummyinbeds is it the ADHD causing sleeping issues?
If so it's the biggest problem in my 3 with ADHD. It can become more problematic when they leave home, don't have the school routine any more & have differing timetables every day at Uni. We have melatonin prescribed for mine which helps reset the body clock.
Also dd1 finds the non-herbal Nytol/Sominex better than Melatonin. But having a routine is the best advice.

Snap @Piggywaspushed DD also got a 64 mark on her first assignment - still has two more to get back.

@crazycrofter your poor DD, that sounds stressful but good she could be at home for some home comforts and support. My niece is doing Psychology and is in her 3rd and final year now and it's so many exams she says - they seems to be online though (Sussex Uni)
Fingers crossed to DS for tomorrow's driving test 🤞🤞

Sorry to hear you've been unwell @Shimy and congrats on the placement offers for DS - what did he choose to do in the end?

That exam sounds v disheartening as you say @Monkey2001 so I hope he didn't take his results to heart.

@Shimy I totally missed you post, I'm sorry to hear you've been unwell and hope you are well on the road to recovery.

@Cantonet @mummyinbeds both mine have sleep issues too. Ds is actually trying very hard to sort himself out, with noise cancelling headphones and a mask, but he still has far too many daytime naps which throw him off. Can you get melatonin on the NHS? Dd seemed to be doing a bit better following her HANDLE techniques but it’s all gone out of the window since deadlines and exams converged. She just can’t manage her time.

Sorry to hear you’ve been unwell @Shimy , I hope you’re fully recovered soon. Great news about the placement!

@Cantonet @JustHereWithMyPopcorn spot on about the (non diagnosed) ADHD and sleeping. DS recognises that lack of routine and accountability to school teachers is a problem. He has also started talking about anxiety when he does wake up - If he can't follow his routine then he feels paralysed and buries his head under the pillow to avoid the day. And then he's so anxious about not waking up on time that he can't get to sleep. He really needs to get his mentor in place to help with routine cos he doesn't listen to me, or if he does it's not the same.

Sorry to hear you've been unwell @Shimy and thinking of you too @Alwaysplayspicc

@Shimy Sorry you have had a very rough health patch. I hope you are feeling a little better each day. Loving DS surprising you.

Good luck to all those with exams, mocks and driving tests.

Thanks to everyone for your well wishes. I'll put the weight back on gradually DS said I have a boney smile now, courtesy of high cheek bones that are even more prominent now.

@Alwaysplayspicc Ah! cake unfortunately I had bowel surgery so indulgences like cake have to be restricted at the moment. I think basically eating regularly will bump the weight up over the next few months.

@mummyinbeds Well done to your DD holding her own amongst the huge ego boys. Reminds me of when i was doing my masters, there was a particular guy that kept correcting everything I said each time i contributed to group discussions, only to then go and repeat exactly what I had said in seminars later. It felt really intimidating as well as frustrating. He was obviously trying to make himself look clever and I admit I could've been more assertive but instead I just grew silent. I think this is one of the big arguments for single-sex schools for girls but it doesn't help once you get to uni. Hope your DD put them in their place.

So sorry to hear about DS's struggles with organisation and sleep. Sleep not so much was the problem but the organisation and anxiety then when he went on meds it added the battle with his appetite.We went through all this with DS throughout primary and secondary. DS is now managing things himself without my constant intervention and is more aware and accepting of his difficulties and so uses the support in place. Be encouraged that they do overcome this and your ds will too.

@Piggywaspushed Well that's weird but DS also got exactly 64% in his first assignment in yr 1. How is DS1? i think last time (quite a while ago) i remember he was job hunting, I hope he has found something he enjoys, sorry if I'm way off the mark and things have moved completely on from that.

Hi shimy. Hope you recover soon!

DS1 is currently working as a TA. Half-hearted job applications for local government, social work and civil services programmes have not been fruitful...

Sorry to hear all that, @shimy!

DD has no exams (ever..!) but has handed in her portfolios for last term's work (two modules).

This was a weekly homework assignment. I'm not entirely sure of the brief or why she did it in pottery, but here's a man in a rain-coat (i.e. a coat made of rain...)

Piggy do you think perhaps he might want to become a teacher? he is so well qualified the dc will be lucky to have him as a TA. Is there a chance that after graduating he has gone off his subject? a friend's DD studied Food science, got a job offer etc, her parents were delighted. Shortly after graduation she announced she'd turned the job offer down as she had completely gone of food science. She did however retrain and is now working in Tech.

All you can do is continue to encourage him to keep applying and the right position will come up for him. It's so easy to become disheartened. Listening to ds2 talking about the many stages of applications nearly did my head in and that's not even a permanent job, just an internship. It's quite hard for many young people at the moment.

I don't think he ever much liked his subject! He does toy with teaching but unfortunately his degree doesn't translate very directly to a school subject that offers training placements.

He'll get there in the end!

Piggy I agree with you he will find his way, it's hard though watching them getting knock backs and their confidence suffering in the process. You just want to fly in and sort everything out but they have to learn themselves.
I wish him loads of luck and good fortune for the new year.

@PhotoDad Thank you.
Lovely pottery. That's some serious side-eye from girl doll. Man in rain coat is looking very guilty/sheepish is there some story to it?

Oh! DD says that it's inspired by the folk song "The Gardener" (recorded by Steeleye Span).

Summarised: Gardener says "I'll make you clothes from flowers if you'll sleep with me." Lady says, "Bugger off, I'll make you wear snow and rain, you creep."

I'm going to mangle the jargon. A friend's DS is starting in secondary school teacher training specialising in SEN with a side order of subject in Sept. No PGCE route. Apparently so new the curriculum is a work in progress.

I think he wants to go into some sort of safeguarding role.

@Piggywaspushed Impressive that one so young sees the importance of such a role. Fingers crossed there is an opening soon.