Thread 49 - Covid GCSE Cohort - The nights are drawing in...

[OrangeSpicedBun]

Autumn 🍂 well and truly underway, has been chilly this week !

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.
Previous thread :

www.mumsnet.com/talk/parents_of_adult_children/4880640-thread-48-covid-gcse-cohort-summer-before-year-2-uni?latest=1

Really struggling for ideas on what to get DD2 for her 18th. She is not interested in clothes, jewellery, makeup or grooming. Dresses in tour T-shirts, hoodies and vans. Hair is a curtain a la Neil from the Young Ones. Obsessed with music, has an encyclopaedic knowledge of 70s-90s rock, reads a lot (although mainly rock biographies at the moment, sigh). Very good bass guitarist, interested in adventurous travel, can identify every flag in the world, has a side interest in cryptography/puzzle solving, plays a lot of backgammon and recently chess. Fantastic and inventive and adventurous chef.
I am at a loss.
For Christmas she wanted nothing but a specific bass guitar strap. I also bought her a paella pan and spices which she was very pleased with, and gave her money towards her gap year.
I would like to give her something meaningful. She doesn’t need a car. I have a fab jewellery collection and could give her something but I don’t think she would wear it. Too young for a painting I think as she is currently actively and irritatingly NOT interested in art. Help please - all suggestions gratefully received!

@mummyinbeds @Delphigirl leave it with me, I’ll see if I can get a photo when DS eventually rises!

@Delphigirl gig tickets?

Not really something to keep but if it’s a favourite band will bring good memories?

@Delphigirl I bought DD a flight ticket to Ghana for her volunteering trip for her 18th. Not something she can keep but a lifetime of memories.

@JustHereWithMyPumpkin DS was aware if the flowchart but as expected, hasn't seen a completed version. A photo would definitely be appreciated.

Congratulations to the new drivers!

I'm taking eldest back on Monday, but DD isn't going back for another 3 weeks. They have 2 assessment weeks, but she doesn't have exams so decided to stay home.

Have sadly realised that our brief spell of being empty nesters is likely to finish in June. DS has said he'd like to find a job in London, rather than elsewhere, so will likely end up living at home. His disorganisation also means he is unlikely to start applying for jobs soon, so will probably not be employed soon after graduating. The thought of him floating aimlessly for months is not filling me with joy which is a horrible thing to say, but having him home for the Christmas break has not been easy. Not sure how to approach rules if he is home permanently. Just the nocturnal living drives me mad - although hopefully if he has a job that would be less of an issue!

Having said that, we had a lovely family evening out at the theatre last night celebrating DHs 60th.

@mummyinbeds @Delphigirl

Congrats new drivers 😀

We are in DD’s flat waiting for … not sure actually. She’s unpacking stuff so I guess we’re waiting for our collection of Ikea bags to be returned to us 😂

Having thought she’d come back midweek she decided on the weekend fairly early on, but not which day. Yesterday saw a flurry of overthinking with her saying she’d have made it Saturday if she’d decided earlier, but now she both wanted to return on Saturday, but NOT return tomorrow (which was Saturday). Eventually she talked herself round. Good run up but a section of the M6 will probably still be closed on the way back.

Work-wise she’s gone from a bit doomy at the start of the hols to quite pleased with herself. She had a research proposal to do that she’s chipped away at and mostly done. I’ve not seen hers but have offered feedback on her study buddy’s (apparently it was welcome …)

She’s due to find out this month which Korean university she’s allowed to apply to - the home uni makes the choice about which Korean ones they send applications to, and it’s one application per place. So unless something goes very wrong, the one they’re allowed to apply to is where they’re going. Can’t believe it’s now THIS YEAR.

There and back in a day - v tiring! Lots of flooding en route but no travel disruption. Drove past Newark and I've never such a lot of flooding. This was DS college boathouse. Pretty sure the river shouldn't be in the boathouse!

Thank you @JustHereWithMyPumpkin and your DS. Apparently DS has spent ages working all that out. Would've been so much easier to go to the damn lecture. 🤦

@mummyinbeds no problem, he's done well to work it all out without the chart!

@Delphigirl Set of high-quality kitchen knives she can take with to uni/whatever! You can spend as much as you like on those...

It was nice to get out of the house today to a nature reserve which was pretty flooded. (Pic shows footpath.) Pleased to see Marsh Tits, which isn't an everyday thing. All pics from DD.

It's my DD's 18th shortly too, apart from the photobook we are getting tickets for a show, but it is hard thinking of something that is a proper forever-present. Mine only wears cheap jewellery (beads on leather thongs etc), no piercings and doesn't want any, lives in jeans, merch t-shirts and one pair of trainers, her main hobby is archery but she doesn't need anything, doesn't need any tech. Doesn't want to learn to drive any time soon.

Lovely photos @PhotoDad . We have had a flock of waxwings appear locally this week which has caused great excitement amongst the birdwatching community.

I think the kitchen knives is a great idea @Photodad - thank you! Plus maybe gig tickets. And a bit more travel money. Thank you, all.

I was bought a sewing machine for my 18th and an inter-rail ticket for my 21st. I am now 52 years old and have fond memories of receiving both. (My parents had never been big on present giving, just bought stuff when I needed it.)

For dds 18th, the family joined together to buy life membership of the national trust. We go a lot as an extended family, and she would not wear jewellery, or want a car, or anything sentimental! So we went with practical.....

I think I considered that for DS's 18th, but as it would only be us and my parents clubbing together it's rather a lot, they wrote to me saying he could no longer use our family membership so I started an annual one for him that I pay for. Of course he never remembers his card and they just wave him though on ours still as he looks young 🤦‍♀️

I got a desk/bookcase for my 18th from local carpenter. I love it still 35 years later.

Congrats to new drivers.

I dropped ds1 back at Nottingham yesterday. Was so easy, my easiest trip yet. Then went to my school friends birthday in Bedford.

@blinkbonny sorry for missing the Notts housing issue. I don't actually know who ds1 used, do you still need me to ask, or hopefully now all resolved?

Thanks for checking @Oblomov23 - not resolved yet but he assures me he is all over it so I think I will step back and not engage in the panic. Until I am asked to pay...

I've been across County today and took these for you all, fresh air, birdsong and salty marshes...followed by a pub dinner.

(Keyhaven)

Thay are lovely photos @OrangeSpicedBun