Thread 49 - Covid GCSE Cohort - The nights are drawing in...

[OrangeSpicedBun]

Autumn 🍂 well and truly underway, has been chilly this week !

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.
Previous thread :

www.mumsnet.com/talk/parents_of_adult_children/4880640-thread-48-covid-gcse-cohort-summer-before-year-2-uni?latest=1

@Oblomov23 not home yet. I was away for work overnight (in the worst hotel ever with no WiFi or phone signal) and my train home today was cancelled 🤦 I'm currently on a train with no idea what time I'll get home.
DD's latest for your entertainment - she was 'traumatised' by a full on face full of foam at a foam party last night. Creepy housemate asked her if she was just getting home when she was in the kitchen at 9am. He disapproves of her drinking and going out so often apparently 🤣

We have DD home. Or at least we did. She’s already out and catching up with her old friends.

Oh dear. We all have flu. Dd due home tomorrow.I’m wondering if I should tell her not to come just yet. It’s vile here. I’m having my first lucid moment in 2 days. Dont want her to feel rejected.

DD comes home today. She uses the coach rather than train so hoping it will be free of cancellations. She doesn't go back until around the 25/1!
DS will be home on Sunday. Love having all the family back together for short bursts 😉

We are off up to collect ds tomorrow but we are having a christmas shopping day, staying over then going to watch him conduct an amateur musical on Sunday before driving him home.

Except he is then going to stay at his grandparents house for 3 days as they are hosting band practise in their garage. (Four 19-21 year old lads sleeping over)!

I forgot to say by the way. he has a girlfriend (she is lovely)

DS also finished today, he was going to drive home tomorrow but is bored because everyone has gone already (he has a late tutorial so can't leave before 5pm) and now wants to drive home tonight. I'd much rather he stayed there until tomorrow, Friday night traffic around London is miserable.

@zebracat hope you all recover from the flu soon, it's horrible being ill but especially at Christmas.

@mummyinbeds hope you get home soon!!

My DS is stuck there till 5 today too as he has got an afternoon shift in his job. He should be out of his exam by now at least. DH is picking him up. But I'll be going back with him on Mon for his stem cell blood tests so will probably have more stuff to bring then. We are planning to stay the day, he's going to work in the library while I potter round town (he's got an assignment due in next week). But this weekend is a break, he's got a hockey match here tomorrow and the team are going out in the evening.

Just getting over Covid so similar here @Zebracat ! Picking up Monday. I've got to tidy her room as been using as home office. Like you I'm a bit nervous about being seen as unwelcoming. Dd is such a sensitive soul when it comes to us. She has certain expectations about how she thinks she should be treated.

Currently going through an assessment for ADHD at present which would explain so much but also uber scary.

@EerilyDecoratedMust be lots of questions whizzing round but it's brilliant of your DS to be on the register. Potentially the most meaningful Christmas gift he'll ever give.

Solidarity with the ill people, I still have the horrible cough I have had for over 3 weeks. Not as bad as it was, but still keeping me awake at night, somebody suggested it might be whooping cough. My menopausal brain is EVEN more foggy that usual!

@Seeline DS back 8th Jan, your DD gets much more holiday than medics! He has singing commitments until Monday, will drive himself home on Tuesday via lunch with my parents at a garden centre just outside the M25 as the car he drives is not allowed inside the M25.

We have managed to get a 20 year old Nissan Micra for DS1 (black and apparently a "sick whip" - ask a young person if you need a translation!) and got insurance in his name with no NCB for £450, which I was pretty pleased about.

I have been very uninspired about Christmas presents, bought Oodies all round and an airfryer for DS2, a few bits for goddaughter and then ran out of steam.

I'm also feeling rotten thanks to dh who has been poorly with what I thought was bad cold. But I'm now off to Google whooping cough...
DD back next week which is probably good seeing as I'm currently using her bed!

I read somewhere that a long cough is a thing this winter, lots have it. DH is still clearing his throat from a cold about 6 weeks ago.

DS got home last night, he was shattered but perked up and wanted to chat at about 11. We all spent the evening watching the darts.

We're a bit short on Christmas presents for DD (DS has already had a phone as his main present, DD doesn't need any tech or other big ticket items). So far an oodie, customised bottle of tomato ketchup, a book, a notebook, a few smaller things. Her 18th is soon too. You might remember me making a photobook for DS's 18th and vowing not to leave it so late for DD, well guess what has happened.

@EerilyDecorated - I remember the photo book! And well done to your DS for stepping up medically.

Sorry to hear all about the ill people. Presents wise DS just has some clothes he wanted and a contribution to iPhone buds or whatever you call them plus some vouchers for food and coffee when he's back at uni. His birthday is early Jan so that will be money...

@Monkey2001 DDs term officially starts on 15/1, but that is for a 2 week assessment period. All her assessments are coursework, bit exams so she has decided to stay at home to do them and return to Norwich for the start of the second semester.

Whooping cough - I caught it when about 6 months pg with DS. Couldn't be vaccinated as a baby for medical reasons, and immunity low because of being pregnant. It was horrendous! Coughing non-stop for days with a significant baby bump in the way was awful. I just coughed and coughed until I actually couldn't breathe and then that made me vomit. Having had very bad 24/7 morning sickness for the first 4 months (off work the entire time), I really didn't need another bout of sick leave and vomiting 🤢.
The GP reluctantly tested for WC saying it was extremely unlikely, and was amazed it was positive.
Hope it's not WC, and all poorly people are better soon.

I've managed to do my back in and have been struggling for the last few weeks. Housework, shopping and cooking are all pretty much impossible so Christmas is not really happening here at the moment.

Visited DS in Notts last weekend - Christmas market pretty good, especially for food! - with the idea we would bring home his stuff and he would travel down by train this weekend. Transpired his "stuff" was just one small hold-all because he couldn't decide what he actually might need for the week so wanted to keep most things with him . Nice to see him anyway!

He and the gf are coming down today and leaving luggage in a locker in London to go off and see Christmas lights before coming home. Looking forward!

Sorry to hear about all of you feeling grim, hope you’re feeling better soon.

picking up DS on Monday, can’t wait to see him!

I collected DS from Notts today. Bloody hell, his house was grim. The kitchen has had a mum clean. It took me an hour to find the sink 🤢 I couldn't face the bathroom. I don't think he'll moan about sharing the bathroom with his sister ever again after living with 5 girls 🤦
He seems to be in an okay place but annoyed with himself for not engaging with uni work. We're going to make an action plan tomorrow. Lots of catch up, assignments and exams over the next four weeks but for now, he's already gone to bed.

We had Indian takeaway this evening. DD described this as “literal heaven”. I think she’s happy to be home.

Looks like lots of you have your YP back home now - yay! Boo to all those with colds and coughs though and sorry to hear you've hurt your back @Seeline - can you take Ibuprofen?

We picked DD up this afternoon and what a lot of stuff she'd packed to bring back for c3/ 4 weeks.
She has had a good first term all in all and has found a like minded friend who also took a gap year so they share similar interests.
She was told she'd passed her presentation straight after she did it on Thursday (no grade til new year) but meant she could relax over the break. Handed in her due essay on Tuesday and has another to do in Xmas hols so hope she gives herself time to complete it. She's told me she's booked to see one friend or group of friends every day so she's pretty booked up so I hope we see her - have had a lovely chat this evening after her chosen Chinese takeaway dinner so feel we've caught up.

Decorations go up tomorrow and then I'll feel more festive i think. They're normally up by end of November so this is weird but i wanted to wait for DD to be home so we could do it together.

DD got home on Thursday, and now we're all up in Scotland for a week, with the in-laws. Looking forward to doing very little for a few days. (I've had the Cough That Will Not Go Away for the last four or five weeks, but it sounds a lot worse than it feels; good luck to other sufferers!)

Sorry to hear of all those ill. And particularly @Seeline with her bad back. Hope that improves quickly. I know all about that.

Glad to hear most of you have dc home / have already picked them up. Makes me feel all cozy.

Ds1 has been in Notts this week, no communication, so I text him to ask when he was coming home, no answer as yet.

I haven't bought any presents. Dh nor I can even think of anything we want. Ds2 also says he doesn't know. I went to church orchestra carols which I love this week. I only got the decs out of the loft yesterday under duress from Dh insisting that because I hadn't he would put the outside lights up. I normally would have it all up a good week or 2 weeks ago. But I just can't be bothered this year. I'm fat, after having been the same weight for 30 years, shrunk 3 inches in height in the last year, having always been very small already, so now almost a midget, (great!). diabetes shit presumably through stress, no back resolution 9 months later, osteoporosis, on paracetamol, tramadol, gabapentin and morphine (all of which is useless and doing nothing, constant pain) for my back broken in 4 places. No suggestion of what to do to address the root cause, so I stay on that medication till I die? Bullied at work by new manager, which has now been dismissed by HR. New employment contract with major changes I've objected to, including stating I'll be available for work 24/7, evenings and weekends. And to top it all off the local hospital. They me discharged me re my back and then when I complained they then accused me of harassment, which is a crime. because I kept phoning asking when I was going to be seen? but if someone sees that on my notes they'll assume I've said something terrible about a protected characteristic i.e. about someone's race or sexual orientation. Which is clearly not the case. As if I would!? quite frankly the way I feel right now I couldn't give a fuck if anyone wants to identify as a hedgehog or a banana. So yeah, feeling a bit shit. What a fucking year. Can't wait for 23 to be over. Rock on 24.

The only good thing is that Ds1 (and even no trouble Ds2 who bumbles along easily bless him) is thriving, and I'm pleased and proud.

On the way to collect DD and <whispers> we’re set to do it in 2.5 hours. Never got through the M5/M6 junction so smoothly in all the years we’ve been doing it (DH’s parents also in the NW so that’s many, many years) 🤞🏻

@Oblomov23 so sorry it's all so shit at the moment. Sometimes everything just seems to come at once. Let's hope for a better 2024.

I had a lovely surprise yesterday - DS had told me he was coming home this evening. At 3pm yesterday he walked in the door! He'd come home so that he could come to my Christmas concert with DH and DD. I belong to a lovely ladies choir which kept going on zoom throughout lockdown. We're definitely amateurs, with no auditions, but it's such a great group of supportive ladies. But frankly I am amazed that my 2 young adults want to spend a Saturday night, just before Christmas, listening to a lot of menopausal women belting out their version of a Mariah classic - yes we did a 3 part version of All I want for Christmas 😆

Oblomov, I hear you, and cannot offer anything useful other than roll in 2024 as a better year for you on all counts. But yes, celebrate the boys, and the decent young men they are turning out to be.

That’s a lovely surprise from your DS Seeline. I’m sure you have a cracking choir :)