Thread 49 - Covid GCSE Cohort - The nights are drawing in...

[OrangeSpicedBun]

Autumn 🍂 well and truly underway, has been chilly this week !

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.
Previous thread :

www.mumsnet.com/talk/parents_of_adult_children/4880640-thread-48-covid-gcse-cohort-summer-before-year-2-uni?latest=1

Waves to everyone 👋👋

So much to catch up on but it's been lovely to find you all again.

Sorry to hear of your loss @Piggywaspushed but great DS was well enough to attend.

Hope your CEO listened to you yesterday @Oblomov23

@Cantonet that is so frustrating for your DS and presumably you still had to incur the cost or did your instructor waive the lesson cost? Fingers crossed he gets another one v soon.
We've booked a couple of lessons over the Christmas break and may try and get a cancellation test if lucky - have the Testi app which is showing tests in May right now.

3 weeks til DD breaks up too and last day of 5:30 wake ups for her school placement that she's had all this month poor love. She's exhausted and realised last night on the phone to us she'd made her lunch for the next day in her thermos but it was soup so by lunch time today it would be stone cold. She's written 32 Christmas cards to her class children plus teacher and TA as today is her last day there.

We visited her on Sunday for 4 hours which was amazing as I hadn't had a DDhug for 3 wks. For the first time she seemed relaxed and settled and is making firm friends which is lovely. Batting off boys left right and centre and had to gently say to the one who is most insistant that they can only be friends and it's never going to happen. She doesn't want the awkwardness of breaking up with a good course mate which he is and being in same seminar group etc.
Got lots of course work to finish and a presentation on the last day of term so she will be ready for a proper break.
Has also sorted a house for next year which I thought was super early but housing in West Sussex is an issue and she didn't want to end up miles away in say Portsmouth like one girl she talked to in 2nd year now.

Good to hear your news @AnneOfCleavage - sounds like your dd is doing really well!

Dd and friends had signed up for a house next year - well, only two of them have actually signed so far - and they’ve now seen something better 😬 Are they tied to the first house now?

@crazycrofter DS contract was only complete when all had signed up and paid deposits so your DD might be okay, but as ever it will be in the small print.

DS was supposed to row in a novice event at the weekend. Bit disappointed as the committee decided as they had only been on the river once not to allow them to compete. Today he has sent me a video of them swimming/pushing their boat to the river bank. Looks like a very sound decision was made on Saturday. A couple of hot chocolates seems to have thankfully restored them to good health. He said it was freezing.

Sorry to hear that re flat Cantonet.

Finally spoke to CEO today, then long time with HR, who said they are going to talk to him about his managerial style. Dh says to take that as a win.

Checking back in and catching up with everyone’s news.

@Cantonet sorry to hear that and hope your DS can get another test soon.

DD (who withdrew at the start of year 2) has finally found someone to replace her in her house who has signed a new tenancy so big relief that she won’t have to fork out for the remaining 7 months rent and bills. Still expecting a council tax bill but nothing yet. She’s heard back from Open Uni and they will accept her year 1 certificate of higher education to transfer into year 2 of the music degree however DD is now thinking she would actually like to complete her degree in person and be with other people. We’ve been looking at ARU as they have a music performance degree, small intake, DD likes the course modules as they include composition and I tend to work in Cambridge atleast 1 day a week so could check in on her. Additionally her best friend is at Cambridge uni so would be near by. @PhotoDad is it your DD that is there at the moment? Any feedback?
DD is doing ok, having counselling once a week and going to a teenage mental support group one day a week, playing in lots of orchestras, going to the gym and attempting to get better but is still very up and down. Adding to her stress is not being able to get hold of any ADHD medication as it’s in short supply and she’ll run out next week. Shes also applied for a few part time jobs but nothing yet.

@PaddingtonPaddington Yes, my DD is on a small intake course at ARU. She really enjoys the course and the tutors, her only problem was with some of the other students but that can't be predicted anywhere. And she loves Cambridge! (For your DD...there are so many opportunities for musicians there. Most Cambridge Uni societies are open to ARU students.) Feel free to PM me if you have any questions I could help with. (Hope she gets the medication; otherwise it all seems positive.)

DD has been offered the chance to renew her private accommodation (a room in an HMO) before it goes on the market. It's a little overpriced but in a really great location. She's going to see whether she can persuade one of her friends to move in, which would swing it for her as she found house-hunting a nightmare last year.

@Oblomov23 That sounds very positive! Hope that something comes of it.

@Oblomov23 I’d take that as a win too.

Where have you got to with booking a new driving test @cantonet?

@PaddingtonPaddington sounds like your dd is keeping busy which has got to be good for her mental health. Would she be looking to restart year 2 somewhere next year or start from year 1?

Sounds like a positive step @Oblomov23 hopefully it will help.

@PaddingtonPaddington Glad to hear your DD is doing so well and also gets hold of her meds soon, what on earth is going on that we have a shortage?

@EwwSprouts that was sound advice not to race when he's only been on the river once, it is so easy for the boats to capsize. When DS2 started they had to do cold water tests and swim 50m in the river and then tread water for 3 minutes. It was so cold some of them went into shock with it and literally couldn't move. They also have to practice capsizing and recovering the boat or if they can't turn it and get back in then at least be able to get hold of it and swim push it to shore. DS2 is back on the water this Saturday as the stream has slowed but its going to be freeeeezing so they may still cancel.

@Oblomov23 - sounds a positive step

@EwwSprouts - definitely sounds like a good decision. DS was at the boathouse at 7.30 today for his last novice race. Hope it's warmer in Cambridge than in Harrogate!

@PaddingtonPaddington my teens ADHD pills have been switched to short acting ones from Elvanse. These are readily available & are the same compound. Our GP is happy to prescribe them following a letter from the ADHD clinic. But we did have to pay £260 for a private prescription in London for Dd2 as she was about to run out a couple of weeks ago. Our clinic is saying it may be difficult to get until mid February.
There's several reasons why there's a shortage apparently. It's a worldwide one not a home-brewed one this time.
Yes, Ds has a test booked for next Monday.
Can I vent here ?
DS went for a trial shift yesterday organised by me & halfway through he stupidly told them he was sacked & why 😡 After that they told him to sort out the storage area & said they'd let him know 😭
I was incandescent with fury at him.
I swear his brain is not functioning properly ( has severe ADHD & is refusing to take his tablets currently) I now have a hangover from 🍷 Ng whisky last night ...

@cantonet good news about the re-test but 'noooooo' about the job conversation. 😖

Oh bless him Cantonet, his conscious is clearly very strong! Best of luck for Monday!

Good to see your update Paddington

Eww, concur on the sound advice. Whilst DD’s old school was a whizz at knocking out champion rowers from Y9, there were also too many horror stories in parallel, river safety is so misunderstood if done properly. It’s great to hear the novice rowers really enjoying their new sport.

Can’t spell. Conscience 🙄

Oh no @Cantonet ! That's really not the best way to sell yourself 😂Did the new job involve handling money?

@Oblomov23 Definitely a win there. Well done.

@JustHereWithMyPumpkin Good luck to your DS for Saturday. These rowers do seem to like an early start. I was amused when DS had to do the swim test at 6.30am a few weeks back. I've never, ever known him up at that time. I am taking that as a sign he is enjoying it @ealingwestmum

@craggyrat DS is north of you and they've had loads of snow now. I hope Cambridge is far more balmy.

@Cantonet The world would be a better place if there were more with your DS's honesty and integrity.

Bless him @Cantonet, but I can see why you were beyond furious.

@Oblomov23 awareness is key, fingers crossed things get better.

Good to see updates from @AnneOfCleavage and @PaddingtonPaddington !

Developed an interest in a bit of a barney on WIWIKAU (rather an aggy OP!) so want to do a straw poll. The OP is taken aback (in a rather overly emotive way) by 12 month rents for uni . She is being told it's fine because the costs are the 'same as halls'. Must admit, I find halls v expensive and expect private to be cheaper.

Just out of idle curiosity, post...

Uni location
Private accommodation - ends up same as halls or cheaper
Length of lets.

I'll start:-

DS1 : Lincoln
Private accommodation far cheaper than halls
Private lets run mid August to mid July as standard with deep cleaning and renovations in between

DS2 : Birmingham
Private accommodation more expensive than my DS's halls (Aitken)
52 week let; students expected to clean

I know which I think is better!

I wouldn't be surprised to hear if this divides itself as Russell Group/ more affluent intakes vs the rest but we'll see!

@Piggywaspushed do you mean total cost for the year?

In which case dd's halls at Nottingham cost more than private accomm, but then she did have catered. I think we paid around £6,200 pa but it was only for 30 weeks.

This year she's paying £80 pw so £4,160 and next year she's paying £105 for 50 weeks for a nicer house, so that's £5,460. Bear in mind that no one else on mumsnet or WIWKAU appears to be able to find these cheap Nottingham houses though, 😂so the same may be true of Birmingham - perhaps there are cheaper houses out there that your ds didn't see.

I think it can vary considerably even at 1 uni. Halls at UEA range considerably in price. DDs room this year is about £1500 cheaper than last year's and she's still not in the cheapest accommodation. The total cost of rent next year (for 12 months rather than Sept-June in halls) is approx £1500 cheaper than her current room, but doesn't include bills. I am sure there are houses in Norwich that work out more than the £96/week that we will be paying.

Mainly I'm interested in whether it's 12 months or not. It should be loads cheaper really...

DSs house is quite pricy owing to his spolit housemates but he was in he second cheapest halls.

DD is in Cambridge. Halls were the cheapest she could find. Current room is en suite and 12 month contract. It's more expensive per week (but bills are included).

Halls were £4800 for 40 weeks. Current room is £8400 for the year.

Not clear with private lets in Preston whether they’re 52 week contracts or not, but I would guess so. Basic rather than premium en suite in DD’s current private hall would be £89pw on a 51 week contract, and you can get rooms in houses for that so on a 52 week contract would be similar. Uni halls if anything are a little more, though you can get shared bathroom flats for less than DD has paid either year. So it’s a fairly mixed economy with anything from £55 for a room in a house (bit out of the way, bills not included) to £170 or so in halls (studio).

DS Durham year 1 was £6600 in s/c halls for 32 week contract. Year 2 private rental flat £9800 for 52 week contract, student expected to clean, but includes £2k utilities 'allowance' (across the four students).