Thread 43 - GCSE Covid Cohort ..November 22 Remember Remember

[OrangeCinnamonLatte]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had

Previous Thread

I can’t work out what’s happening with the trains tomorrow. Ds wants to go to Birmingham to see friends but there don’t seem to be any trains out of Brum in the evening even though the strikes have been cancelled?

It said on the news that it was too late to reinstate most of the cancelled trains for tomorrow so there will still be major disruption.

So basically no strike but the disruption of the strike - which is the point of striking- will still have an effect

DD was very similar with her 6th form experience which was why she wanted the gap year to gain some confidence esp as she's a summer born.

She has some p/t jobs so is earning some money at last - all working with children. Also volunteers in a school getting valuable experience with working in a classroom in preparation for Uni placements. Passed her driving theory and is now insured on my car to practice in with DH (@NCTDN we used GoGirl in the end as £281 for the whole year) and has a test booked for Spring. She's made some new friends and is being quite sociable and proactive in organising stuff - held a Halloween party at ours which gave a much needed confidence boost. So all in all this gap year is proving to be a big success and she is hearing stories from friends who have gone this year so is preparing herself for her turn and buying bits and pieces for her Uni room :-) She's also doing a scrap book gap year book and it's half filled already!!
Can your DD write a list of things she would like to achieve in her gap year. Start small like learning to cook simple things. DD has to choose a recipe, buy ingredients and cook for us all once a week - she's really enjoying the novelty so far...

DD is driving back to Cornwall on her own today. So I’m likely to be a nervous wreck for several hours!

@AnneOfCleavage Hi, sounds good. DD is a very good cook and baker already so have no worries there. She cooks at least once a week. She passed her driving test in January so uses my car when I’m not working. It’s just the lack of friends around really. BF is home this weekend so she’s happy but will be down again when he goes back.
She has just had her 3rd uni offer though from Surrey.🙂

DD has decided on group and house and we have signed as her guarantor. One question - we had to confirm that we were home owners - does that mean that parents who don’t own a house can’t do this? That can’t be right, surely?

House seems fine - in West Jesmond very near the very nice brunch restaurant we patronised last week. £100 a week + bills, or £120 inclusive. Massive difference to her brother half an hour a way in Durham! Nice kitchen and sitting room, but no table to eat at - their plan is to purchase a coffee table!

@Benjispruce4 great news about your DD’s offers - fantastic morale lift!

@KingscoteStaff £120 a week for West Jes is great! What was the restaurant? It's my neck of the woods and I'm always open to recommendations. (In turn, "Taste of Persia" on Osborne Road is IMO the best of the whole run of restaurants there, having tried nearly all of them with colleagues on evenings out. Or Dabbawal hidden away behind West Jes metro station.)

Hi, been out of the loop for a while, so just did a mammoth catchup.
DS on gap year, managing to be too laid-back. So not sorted anything for further travels yet🤔. Working in coffee shop 3 days a week only. Hence hasn't paid back monies to DD lent for earlier travels. Driving lessons and test only talked about, but nothing done. Eating us out of house and home😂
Still to visit his proposed uni or check out the course/department 😕

I wrote mine a long letter, even though she’s home, about motivation etc. Told her most people would rather stay in bed in the mornings and watch shit on their screens, and she doesn’t have to be perfect. Seems to have helped us understand each other. She’s seeing friends today and going back tomorrow.
@OublietteBravo wow, that is very brave of your girl. Does the Cornwall site have parking for students?, don’t think there is any at the Exeter campuses.
Ive had a rotten week and now I’m sick, 2 negative Covid tests, but I have all the symptoms, and my daughter, who was here last week got it 2 days after going home. I have come back to bed with a book. Might beg someone to bring me chocolate soon.

@PhotoDad I think it was called 1901? In part of a church? Have noted your suggestions for next time.

Thanks! Never been there, but I'm not normally around at lunchtimes.

£120/week inc bills? Wow. Sounds amazing!

It does doesn’t it?!

Need to chat to DS to see if they have had housing discussions yet. The two houses I had previously seen in the road I used to live in, perfect location, were not for rent last week but are now showing as rented for 23/24. I just think it’s too early. The good houses are going so they need to get a move on but the timing seems ridiculous.

This is just a happy little story, which I hope might be positive for those whose DC are fighting MH problems at the moment. This time last year, DD was invited to a big Bonfire Night party which a lot of her sixth form attended. She declined, saying that she couldn't handle crowds and didn't have anything in common with anyone there.

This year, after some therapy and some medication and getting away to her dream art-school, she is currently baking goodies with her friends before they head off together to a fireworks display. So positive changes can happen even if things look bleak. (She really didn't have a good couple of years.)

Bonus: Back at the Botanic Gardens to do her homework.

Lovely pictures @PhotoDad and a brilliant story too - so glad things have turned round for your dd and she’s so happy. It must be such a relief for you.

It’s lovely hearing of so many of you seeing your dc for weekends or reading weeks. Is anyone else not seeing their child until Christmas? I’d thought we’d go in half term and maybe just take him out for dinner…didn’t want to impose too much as I know he’s crazy busy. But it didn’t happen and now we’ll not see him til he’s home at the end of term.

Im so happy that he’s settled and made loads of friends but boy do I miss him!

It's been great to see ds2 but not seen much of him really as he sleeps so much. Nothing changed there. He spent a couple of hours with us fri eve. as he didn't get here till quite late. Then I had to go to work 1pm yesterday. I did wake him before I went as I'd booked him in for a haircut at 3pm. He went back to sleep but set an alarm, so he didn't miss the haircut. I was back early eve and we took him and his mate to watch the show. In the car dh and I had more conversation with ds's mate than Ds as Ds was on his phone all the time 😡
He's not up yet. I just got yelled at for asking if he's getting up. I don't get all this sleeping. Spends half his life asleep. He wanted to go see friends this morning, they are home for reading week. He was planning getting the 4.30pm train from Cambridge. It's either an hour drive to Cambs or longer if he gets the train there. Hopefully we will have a bit of time to chat in the car before he goes.

Thanks for sharing your DD's story @PhotoDad and her drawings.

DS is at his girlfriends for the weekend but came over for a few hours (and dinner) yesterday. He really can't afford to get the train home every weekend but at the moment if it makes him happy, I'll let it go. He said he'd had a much better week and could put it down to a bit of structure, doing some work and having less time on his own. The hardest time apparently is after dinner and before meeting friends later on. This is the time we've been chatting for the last week. I've made a few suggestions like going to the gym, swim, run, reading, watching the news. Any other suggestions welcomed. At the moment he's happy to keep chatting every day and was also glad I'd joined Snapchat - it was the only way I could get him to read and respond to messages.
DD is still waiting for school to submit her UCAS application which is driving her mad. She's also seen the A-level timetable - she starts with a clash, most of her exams are before half term and she has an exam on the date she's got tickets for Harry Styles and one the next day 😭 Apparently Harry is more important than exams 🤦

Dd saw Harry in the middle of her A Levels last year @mummyinbeds ! Not sure it was quite that tight though! Glad to hear ds has had a better week.

Ds is really making me annoyed now. I'd forgotten how bad his getting up is. It's now 2.30pm. He's still not up. I got shouted at for waking him up. Dh is insisting I go wake him again. I daren't. He's happy to get the train at 9pm tonight whereas I want to be back home well before then 😠

Mine still gets up at 7 am every morning!!

Scarlett I'm not, he's not coming home. (But Dh is seeing him, visiting him on Wednesday and staying overnight because he's got 2 football tickets for Nottingham v Spurs). I won't see him till I pick him up for Christmas.

I miss him quite a lot.

We went out for dinner with friends Friday who have got dc the same ages as us, they seemed shocked that my ds1 isn't coming home, because their ds1 is home most weekends, seeing his girlfriend. But ds is working Saturday and Sundays. Plus I don't want / expect him to come home. I didn't when I was at Uni. It's fine if they want to. Fine if they have a reason to come home. It's also fine if they don't.

My DS (now in his 3rd year) rarely comes home during term - never has. He has a part time job Saturday/Sunday now, and any time he can get during the week he tends to visit his GF in Manchester. We will be going for his birthday later this month, but don't normally visit.

DD us different. She enjoyed seeing us last week, and has booked coach tickets for a weekend home at the end of the month. She decided Christmas was too long to wait.

DD's hockey team play on Saturday, so I don't think she'll be back much. Currently she's using Sunday as a library catch up day.