Thread 42 Corona GCSE Cohort - 👻Creeping it Real for Oct22

[CinnamonOrangeCremeBrulee]

This is a support thread for our young adults post GCSEs 2020, regardless of their educational setting, and their results ( or life updates for those who went into work or have had results earlier). It is respectfully requested that all are supportive and helpful to each other. If you want to start a debate, e.g state vs private, uni vs employment please don't within this thread.

Some of us have been here since first thread back in yr10, some will be new. Everyone has been friendly and helpful in the past. Everyone is welcome. It is hoped this will continue. We were previously on the secondary board and then further education, now we shall be here in 'Parents of Adult Children' gulp

Our DS/DD may continue down various pathways ( employment, apprenticeships, higher ed). Be warned there might be lots of 'Uni Freshers' chat this time of year. My experience is that everyone is welcomed wherever, whatever their child is doing we have some in work, gap years , apprenticeships etc too. Lots of contributors with different experiences and always sympathy and advice to be had.

previous thread

Thank you all for the support, I really appreciate it. @singingstones he felt that it was all a bit abstract what they were doing and thought he might prefer something a bit more applied . But he recognises that might just be how he was feeling. My plan is to get past bloods and results, see where he is with that (would be surprised if he doesn't need another increase) , get him to a counsellor and actually having a few sessions then see if he can maybe unpick it a bit.

I also need to find some groups that he can go to , probably with DH to start with I guess so need to think of something for them that is sociable and has a good mix of ages . Or some live music, or both. I know i need to get him out somehow as not doing anything makes it worse. Once he is a bit better I'm going to encourage him to look at some volunteering.

Is he up to some part time work @Volterra as that would be a good way to meet people? Hope he feels much better within the next few months; I’m sure he’ll be more able to think about next year once he’s feeling right.

@Volterra as a maths graduate I agree that maths can get very esoteric - most of my notes had more greek letters than numbers! Maybe he would like something like Engineering Maths (Bristol is very good for that) www.bristol.ac.uk/study/undergraduate/2023/engineering-maths/beng-eng-maths/

As an adult I am more interested in the use of data, so if I was choosing now I might do something like this www.bristol.ac.uk/study/undergraduate/2023/maths/bsc-data-science/

Both develop very useful skills to enhance employment opportunities.

I think it is great that he is questioning and reviewing.

My sister also did maths and was a bit disappointed - she said it was nowhere near as much fun as A level!

I think it will partly come down to the psychology of it - does he feel like he's pressed pause and is looking forward to diving back in next year, or would he prefer to have more of a reset and start afresh with something / somewhere different?

DH did a maths degree. Got a Third. he hated it, found it hard , did no work, played football and drank beer...

@volterra.I’m sure he will come through this with such careful support.
The news on D.cat is very bad. We are keeping her with us on hand fed chicken and lots of fuss until Wednesday. My Dh just broke the news to me really tactfully and we had a little cry. Then I had a right go at him about what he bought for dinner. Deflection I guess. Hope he understands.
Casper has returned to his own kingdom.@Oblomov22 Please don’t Put him back in the list. This thread is always so welcoming to new people, and sometimes little in jokes can put people off who want to join us. It did make me laugh tho.

I don't think he likes football, oh dear 😀 i agree it is good he is questioning it. He thought he was prepared for what degree level is like. I will float other options past him at some point. Agree the psychology of it will come into it and I can't at the moment call with way it will go..

Oh no @Zebracat , I am so sorry about DCat 💐

I'm sorry to hear about Dcat Zebra. It's almost a year to the day since we lost ours and your description of fuss and hand-fed chicken rings true 😢
I hope you are ok, and DD too when she comes home.

O , poor wee kitty

I won't Zebra. He can be on our back up list!

@Volterra sorry coming to this late. Based near Bath, it’s on the line between London and Bristol, whereabouts are you?

Nothing to add to what others have suggested, @Volterra, but fingers crossed for a good resolution.

sorry to hear about DCat @Zebracat so sad

@whatsnext2 , we’re off the M5 below Bristol a bit. He can reach both Bristol and Bath by train but then needs to get to the universities in both scenarios. Hoping he will learn to drive as we are now barely using second car but don’t want to get rid of it and he could use it a fair bit. Will see how things progress I think .

@Volterra learning to drive is a great thing to get done in a gap year and could give him independence, you just need to try to find a driving instructor.....

Just about caught up. @Volterra - am sorry to hear about your DS.

Nothing really to report here. DS seems fine. We will be going down to collect four weeks this weekend. Where did that time go? I’m trying to find another job after almost 18:years with current firm, which is proving impossible. We have been outsourced and taken over twice this year and am fed up of it. DH and I are quite enjoying this empty nest thing, although we miss DS a lot.

Hi everyone. Lots to catch up on. @Volterra I’m really sorry about your boy but I think, like others, he is lucky to have you and a year to mature and gain life skills and resilience is a very positive thing. @mummyinbeds im sorry your DS is also having a tough time, it must be very worrying. I’m glad he is talking to you about it and dd is supporting him. @Zebracat I’m enjoying hearing about your girl’s happiness and snippets of The Life of Casper, but v sorry about the cat. Enjoying the stories of kids returning home for visits and the shock of teen try on both sides - @279Nouveauxnoms you made me laugh as I recognised that so well!

I have started the 4th and final round of uni visits with 4th child - DD. Did London (LSe and kings) over half term and then an epic road trip to Edinburgh and St Andrews this weekend. The only actual open day was Edinburgh. she doesn’t give much away but came out of the Arabic talk at Edinburgh skipping and enthused. She is studying Arabic at school as a sideline to her A levels. So that is the way she is currently thinking, maybe joint with another subject or language. Tiring trip but I think very helpful to start her thinking about university and visualising herself there.

Working throught everyone's news after a half term trip away to Belgium (now to work off all the waffles and frites). Sorry to hear of struggles but not too surprised tbh - I think Covid has thrown so many for a loop for a start. Hope your ds finds his feet in his year out Volterra. Sorry to hear about your dcat Zebracat, our cats are giving us the usual post-holiday grief for daring to go away without them but I'd be gutted to lose either of them.

Preparing to see the phlebotomist at our GP surgery about dd1's non-conforming blood this morning, trying not to be nervous about it.

So sorry to read the news of your DCat, zebra - absolutely the worst part of living with a much-loved animal.

Your DS has amazing support from you, Volterra. Hopefully, with time and an improvement in health, he’ll be able to work out his next steps.

DD is coming home for a few days today. She’s getting the train for the first time, but all the direct trains have been cancelled, so she’s going to have to tackle changing at Hereford.
Fingers crossed, she manages it without too much anxiety.
It was her birthday on Friday, so I’m about to make her a cake and wrap her presents, and we’ll have her favourite dinner tonight.

Well dd is home and it’s all a bit stressful. We were all so excited for it but she’s come home with a mountain of work and all she wants to do is go out with her friends. I’m feeling rather flat about it all.
Sorry to hear of others with far worse struggles than I am facing.

It is a bit of an anti climax when they come home and are either grumpy or just want to see friends, isn’t it? Hope you get on ok with dd @Alsoplayspiccolo . @cariadambyth I’m slightly dreading Christmas as it will be four weeks of manic socialising which is more complicated and expensive now we’ve moved out of Birmingham and dd will have exams after!

Sorry to hear about your cat @Zebracat 😢

Thank you all for sharing your experiences, good and bad, on here. It all helps with putting life into perspective.
So, I took DS back to uni on Sunday night. He was in a much better place than when I collected him on Friday and seemed ready for his week ahead. Driving back down the motorway I got a phone call (hands free!) from a friend of DD to tell me DD had passed out drunk at a party and she didn't know what to do. I was about 90 minutes away. After a panicky 10 minute drive to the next services I arranged for friends mum to collect DD and hang on to her till I got back (DH in bed with Covid) About 20 minutes later I got a confused call from DD wondering what all the panic was about. She was fairly sober but had fallen asleep at the party following a full day at work. By the time I got home at nearly midnight I could see the funny side 🤦
And then yesterday morning I couldn't get DS to answer the phone. By 11 I was all ready to get back in the car and drive up there. He eventually called me in tears. He'd slept through his alarm, his phone, slamming doors and halls mayhem, missed his French exam and following lectures. He was so frustrated with himself and didn't know how to recover the situation. I ended up talking him through one task at a time. As a result, French test is rescheduled for Thursday, lectures can be caught up online and most importantly he got an emergency MH appointment and actually went to it. He has a follow up next Monday to discuss medication which he thinks he will agree to.
It's a good job my boss is off this week because I'm really not focused on work.

Oh wow @mummyinbeds what an eventful few days you’ve had 😮 Sounds like you’ve done a sterling job all round though! Glad dd wasn’t actually passed out and ds has a plan despite the disastrous morning. Something must be up with his health for him to sleep so soundly? Maybe it’s a combination of things, as well as his mental health struggles. It’s great that he’s engaging with help though.

Oh no @mummyinbeds , how incredibly stressful for you all 🌷Crazycrofter has a point about possibly something going on to make him sleep so soundly, though it may just be the effort of everything. Probably worth him getting bloods to check his iron levels etc and his thyroid . Covid seems to be triggering autoimmune conditions very occasionally in some who are predisposed to them. My friend’s DD is on thyroid watch following it.