The Zoo!

[WinomoreTheFruitbat]

Is it feeding time yet?

pull up a rock or patch of grass and get comfy in our new enclosure!

Penguin Please don't stay away when you feel rubbish - I knew you were and have been meaning to contact you but have been a bit tired and busy myself. I actually thought the other day how little you ladies moan about being pg and how I must've been a complete nightmare.

Trying to hoover and decided it sounded a bit roapy so took the bottom off and got out a hairgrip, which would've been great but now I can't get it back together without it making an awful noise that makes N SCREAM so can't even keep trying to fix - grrrrr - that will teach me for doing housework

DD in nursery but only for another hour and I've just spent my day cleaning and ironing - and had a little snooze.
Giraffe Your poor hoover. Any luck with fixing it?
Penguin As Giraffe rightly said, don't stay away. We're here to support you and offer advice so keep posting or I'll get cross .

Happy weekend all x

penguin sorry about the spd, please complain away! Bf is going much better now things have evened out and I is going longer between feeds. We didn't have a great night last night, she wouldn't settle from 4am and pooed up her back too! She keeps doing that! Little tinker

Hello ladies !

Panda what news from you my dear ?

Giraffe hurray the hoover is broken so perfect excuse not to hoover - 'that'll learn ye' . I can't hoover with DS in the house as he has taken to screaming too - hurray !

Hyena glad you managed to fit in a nap otherwise what a waste of a day off doing housework

meeow glad to hear that feeding is going better, it is a constant nightmare in the first few weeks but it will settle down.

Penguin so sorry to hear you have suspected SPD, it is supposed to be tough going. But you are right that you'll get your reward when your angel baby pops out and you breeze through motherhood

Where is Nemo ? I know it is a busy time but I want to see photos !!!

evening ladies
news from Ei towers is AF is a current houseguest and is showing no signs of sodding off!! CD3 cycle 24 now for me!! woo hoo... 2 years...it feels like a minute ago that i first joined the TTC waiting room thinking i wouldnt be waiting long...

hope all is ok and my misery doesnt bring you lot down too much

xx ei xx

Hello! It's me! so sorry it's taken me so long to log on, for the last 2 days it's been the one thing at the top of the list, but somehow I've still never managed it. Sorry too for the patchy updates, I should have made sure I had everyone's mobile number before T was born Neither DH nor I had any mobile reception at the hospital, he had to hang out of the window to send the group text for me, so hence why I wasn't in better contact while I was in there.

Ok, so here is the birth story I've just done to send by email:

Dear All,

Just to let you know that our beautiful daughter was born at 0519 on Friday 28th August (and we got the pool room!)

I went for a sweep on Thursday 27th at 40+1 and was told I was 3cm dilated already. Niggly pains from then onwards, progressing to "proper" contractions by about 2330. They were about 5 mins apart and lasting anything up to 45 secs pretty much straight away. Phoned the hospital at about midnight and was told to go away as they were very busy...! Went in just after 1am anyway and discovered when I got there I was 7cm (told them I was in labour!!)
In the pool & on g&a til about 3.30ish then conned into getting out to be examined and told I should stay out of the water and off the g&a to help me push more efficiently...

Thalia Grace was born at 0519 weighing in at a whopping 8lbs 9oz (ouch!) The mw was optimistic that I "only" had a 1st or possibly a 2nd degree tear, but turned out it was a 3A so I had to go off to theatre for a spinal to be stitched up. Typical - no pain relief for the birth, then half a ton afterwards

Spent the first night in hosp owing to the spinal then off to a birth centre to try to get breast feeding sorted. Stayed there til wednesday, because turns out our little one is a bit of a lazy toad and frankly can't really be bothered! Am still struggling on (and it is a struggle) and have borrowed a heavy duty pump from the mw's so have managed to hold off giving her any formula yet. Basically she won't latch on and if she does she won't suck. Loves to suck your finger and loves to take milk from a syringe/spoon/bottle though.... she's a very hungry baby (what with being MASSIVE and all!) and I'm constantly worried that my supply won't be able to keep up with her as I'm only managing to either express or feed with nipple shields and I know both of thise things are crap for suppply

Really gutted about the feeding, I know my supply won't last if I continue having to pump and use shields rather than feeding her directly on the breast, but despite the help and advice of countless midwives and bf counsellors she just will not do it, and it turns out she's as stubborn as her mummy! Saw a cranial osteopath on thursday which seems to be helping so still keeping our fingers crossed.

Could any of you who are managing to bf please let me know how many times a day you were feeding in the early days? And any tips for increasing supply would be very gratefully received!

Sorry not to catch up with everyone separately, want to go and try to have a bit if a cat nap before T wakes again, haven't produced enough milk for the next feed yet... (need to express 3oz for a proper feed) Lots of love to all, and thanks again for all your kind wishes to us all - DH is loving his new found popularity on fb

nemo lovely to hear from you, sorry you're worrying about the bf but do keep trying it doesn't sound like you're doing that badly. Honest. 'I' basically fed every 2 hours from the start and tool 2- 2 1/2floz, so 'T' is proberly getting enough if you're expressing 3floz. 'I' pretends to be really hungry but can be distracted with a dummy, so perhaps 'T' is the same, in which case you will be fine. Hope this has been of some help? Fb me if you want to chat more? I can give you my no. that way?

Nemo !! Lovely to hear from you my dear . It sounds like it was all very quick and easy until the end . I can so empathise with the feeding problems as you may remember that I exactly the same problem with E - he screamed or fell asleep at the boob but was happy to take milk from syringe/cup or whatever. I wasn't as good at expressing as you have been as he had to have formula for 2 out of 6 feeds in the first few days. However, each day I tried him at the breast again. I found that in the quiet at home with lights dimmed was best for keeping him calm. Then in the middle of the night on day 10 he suddenly got it and I exclusively(ish) BF him from then. I had to give him occassional top ups after a few weeks as I was in such pain. It sounds as if you are doing a sterling job missus. Keep at it (unless it starts to drag you down as it is tough) and keep trying her at the breast. I had to use nipple sheilds for a while too and I don't think they did any harm. If you are managing to express enough for all of her feeds your supply will be just fine - don't stress too much about it. I think some ladies just don't produce enough regardless of how they feed (like our own poor Wino) and others like us have plenty even if it is expressed. Oh and I took notes of my feeds from 4 weeks onwards in a desperate attempt to find a pattern and I was feeding him up to 10 times a day. It was just constant for the first few weeks but it does get better. Keep going my love, it sounds as if you are doing fantastically well. Give me a call/text if you want to chat more as I really did have exactly the same problem xxxx

Giraffe Thanks Did DH fix the hoover after, hopefully not so you can just have fun with N instead
Hyena Even though I haven't managed to get you to clean my house I've got my Mum to do my ironing today She's taken pity on me as I can't walk without looking like I've sh*t myself let alone stand and iron Brilliant!
Meeeow Glad to hear things are getting better with the feeding
Hippo You have the perfect excuse to leave the house with E and let DH do the hoovering now
Panda I don't know what to say to cheer you up as I don't want to sound patronising, I know you feel lucky to have S, but as I said to you the other night, it doesn't take away the uncontrollable feelings of wanting another baby You must be so of us all on here now and I just don't want you to feel left out x
Nemo So glad you made it on here before Christmas Glad to hear you're settling in at home. Is your doula still with you? Has she been helpful with the BF? It must be frustrating, but hopefully like Hippo T will just suddenly "get it". I'd like to book a quick labour like yours if that is possible?

Hope the rest of you are enjoying your weekend

I am so and really need to vent so please forgive me this self indulgent post, but I think I may explode if I don't let it out. Yesterday we went to the In-laws for lunch and 'I' is going through a growth spurt feeding every 1-2 hours which I don't mind at all. MIL kept taking I away and bobbing/swaying her in an attempt to calm her 'hunger' cries!! I said a few times she was hungry but mil conveniently didn't hear! Eventually she allowed me one non judged feed but every subsequent feed was accompanied my judgmental stares as if I was delieberatly taking her away from them! Eventually she came out with what had obviously been going through her mind "maybe 'I' NEEDS a bit of formular to supliment bf"!!! How dare she! I have taken this as a personal attack on my choice of feeding and a deliberate attack on my milk supply, I felt as though I was being accused of neglecting my daughter's needs!! Am I being unreasonable!? I have been crying loads over this and it has driven a bit of a wedge between me and DH who says I am being hormonal!!

afternoon ladies
nemo lovely to see you congrats and lovely birth story your DD is so beautiful and she has a gorgeous name to go with it
meeow so sorry you have had the dreaded MIL interfering my DH's nan was the old hag antagonist when my DD was newborn!! she basically said to me that i was being SELFISH and UNDERHAND by BF DD i blamed the hormones when i told her to F*&K off 'I' is YOUR baby and it is therefore YOUR choice if you decide to BF until she is 5 years of age!!! ignore her and tell your DH to grow a pair of balls and stand up to his mother you might be hormonal but whats her excuse?? YANBU
howdy to everyone else

xx ei xx

panda X x x x x thank you x x xx

Nemo How lovely to hear from you and sounds like you did marvellously. As far as the BF is concerned Hippo certainly knows what she's talking about, I'd forgotten what a trooper she was in the early days. Hippo You were my inspiration to keep going!! Just to add on the supply thing it's a movable feast so once you start feeding T from the breast the supply will increase to suit what she needs so just try to keep the faith that the milk is there.

Meeow I must also still be hormonal as have become on your behalf since reading your post. I think Ei summed it up pretty well. Of by hormonal your DH means sleep deprived and new at all this so not so able to shrug off ill-informed busy bodies then I guess he's right BUT that means others should modify their behaviour and give you a friggin' break and DH should be sticking up for you and protecting his family (that's you and I now - not his mother!!)
You will get so much unwanted and useless advice and it goes get easier to shrug it off. When N was about 4 weeks old I got in such a muddle and had no confidence with what to do with him because I had so many voices. I stayed in for a few days - just me and him and felt sooo much better. Now I just know that I know what he needs more than anyone so they can all bugger off - and you know what your little girl needs so you're in charge!!

Phew rant over!

Hello to all, going to watch some TV as N is asleep and I've done enough chores today.

OMG Meeow, how dare she indeed . What a complete nightmare, and these MILs wonder why they get pushed out !! What she said is completely out of order and quite frankly none of her business. Your decision to BF is your personal choice and you know yourself that I is going through a growth spurt and is therefore hungrier than usual. Like giraffe said 'mummy knows best'. Trust your own instinct and ignore nutters like that who feel they have the right to impart their ill-informed opinions. It is especially out of order to speak to you like that when you are still new to motherhood and sensitive to such comments. Your DH definitely needs to ask her to keep her nose out and let you be the boss when it comes to feeding. sending you big hugs xx

meeow you are welcome cant you tell i have a mummys boy for a DH ( and a nannys boy too) they dont get better you will just get used to saying mind yer business to the meddlers you are doing a smashing job and she hasnt been in your position for years and years
hope everyone is well i myself, am a bit bored in work but hey ho...
xx ei xx

Meeow I'm also very at your MIL's comments about I's feeding and bf - how insensitive! And how dare she suggest formula As Hippo said, you know I's feeding patterns best and know when she is hungry. Goodness, at the same age E was just feeding and sleeping - she'd fall asleep after a feed and wake up to start the next one. They all merged into one. Trust your own instincts. Not easy I know, especially as a first-time mum when you can be easily swayed by the opinions of others. I find skimming relevant threads on MN (sleep in my case!) usually provides me with the reassurance I need that my instincts are correct. And some useful arguments to deploy when others start questioning my approach. I hope DH tells his mum to butt out next time she tries to "help". Loved Panda's comments
Panda Sorry AF is refusing to pack her bags and that work is so boring.
Nemo Good to see you and thanks for sharing your birth story - you did so well! Sorry to hear about your problems bf though - how can something which is meant to be so natural sometimes be so difficult But Hippo is an inspiration and I hope that you and T get things sorted out soon. As far as feeding frequency is concerned, see my comment above about feeds merging into one! I think my record was 7 hours non-stop feeding on day 5. It really is just feed and sleep in the early days, with the odd nappy change here and there.
Giraffe Hope N gave you a decent amount of TV time!
Penguin Sorry to hear about the SPD A couple of ladies on my AN thread suffered and it sounds horrendous. The physio should be able to do a lot to help you though - when is your appt? Glad you're starting to buy things in earnest for LO!
No news from Fruitbat recently - I suspect she's madly busy with wedding preparations
All OK here - we got back from France yesterday and we're back into the normal routine. E is starting to move very fast on all fours and we're rapidly having to babyproof the house! She's also pulling herself up more and more - please no walking just yet, let me get used to the crawling first! I went to pick up the cat from the cattery this morning but he's been outside all day and hasn't had chance to see that E is now mobile. I can't wait to see his reaction - he was already giving her a wide berth before she started moving, it will be hilarious when he realises she can actually go after him

hi ladies
well i was given the boot from my boring job today... i am quite peeved about it TBH as the excuse they gave was a VERY VERY flimsy one! i am taking them to appeal but i doubt it will make a difference (plus i would be loathe to work for them again now after this but its the principal) due to the company being in trouble!!
so it looks like we are- once again- in shit street
xx ei xx

Oh panda that's crappy luck! Good for you standing up for yourself! I'm begining to think I should employ you as my voice too! Go girl x

Thank you, thank you, thank you ladies for all of you words of support and advice. You are fab! I have read and taken on board all of your suggestions and am prepared to be more assertive next time I see mil. As I predicted 'I' was having a growth spurt at weekend hence the feeding frenzy as she is back to her well behaved self and now weighs 10lb 9oz!! The health visitor said I am an example of when bf is going well and should be proud of myself! I was so chuffed and wish mil had been there to hear it. I might bring it up in conversation...tee heee

Panda what an absolute nightmare, poor you . Hopefully they listen to your appeal. This is all you need . Big hugs xx

Meeow well done you, BF is so difficult and can be such a worry as you don't know exactly how much baby is getting. You should be so proud of yourself. And yes definitely drop it into conversation with MIL

I am thinking about getting a book to help get 'I' into a good routine, does anyone have any suggestions? Or should I just let her set her own pattern?

meeow i would go with whatever you feel most comfortable with remember though i is still really new and she is probably a little too new to start a routine DD settled into a routine after about 6-8 weeks and her routine varied depending on how hungry she was (growth spurts etc) try not to get too stressed about routines as you will probably notice one emerging soon enough without any effort BTW excellent weight gain and lovely FB pics of I aswell
hello to everyone else
xx ei xx

Oh Panda what a blardy pain ! You must be Confident you will find something though - fingers crossed.

Meeow If you really want my advice DON'T DO IT! Although everyone is different and it may be just the thing. Whenever I've even looked at a book that suggests routines it's just made me feel miserable and have just gone with N - he's found his own little routine really but it still varies. As Panda says she is still very little.

V/quiet - hello to all and hope that our newest Mummy is doing OK.

Meeeow I'm so glad you had those lovely glowing comments from the health visitor to shove up your MIL's bum place where the sun doesn't shine
Panda Sorry to hear about your job hopefully you will find something a little less boring and then when you win your appeal you can tell them where to shove it too
Impala How is the cat coping with mobile E?
Fruitbat How are the wedding plans coming along? How long til the big day now?
Giraffe Glad you are coping OK now DP has gone back to work, give N a big cuddle from me
Hyena Are you still cleaning?
Nemo Hope all is well?

Well still no appt for the physio I will chase it tomorrow as it will have been a week since I saw the mw. I took yesterday and today off work and did absolutely nothing, so have had a relatively pain free couple of days, back to it tomorrow though, just hope the physio has a magic cure as we go on holiday in just over 2 weeks, we did debate cancelling it as DH is being made redundant the Friday before we go, but sod it we need a break!

Meeow I agree with the others, avoid books as they set unrealistic targets. Personally I knew that they'd be a bad idea for me as I'd get stressed if E didn't do what the routine dictated... bit of a control thing there . Given that E didn't sleep through until 6 months we had no solid routine until then as every day depended on what that prevous night had been like (and that was random). In terms of bedtime routine, we implemented that at 7 weeks and after a few nights he had the hang of it which was great as it meant we got our evenings to ourselves. All we did was start bathtime at 7 with a story, a massage, feed then put him down. he loves his routine now and goes down really easily even if wide awake. As far as daytime went, well he fed every 4 hours but like I said the exact times of these feeds varied day to day. Don't worry about it as when I starts sleeping through and eating solids her routine will fall into place. Just follow her lead.

Having said all that, one of my mummy friends did Gina Ford and her baby slept through from early on and keeps to a tight schedule. However, she got really stressed if we were out and her baby was too distracted to sleep. the rest of us were laid back... I guess it depends what type of person you are and what suits you best xx