Letting a four year old go to the shops unaccompanied?

[wonderingwondering]

DS is 4.5, starts Reception in September. We live 200 yards from our local shop, where they know DS. Today, I thought about letting him go to the shop on his own. We live on a busy road, but there's a wide pavement, and he wouldn't have to cross the road. He's quite sensible.

He seems very young, but he's quite capable of going in to a shop and buying things on his own - he's done that, while I wait outside or in the car, for a year or so now. Is he too young to walk there and back on his own?

I know that my 7 year old sensible DD would not run into the road.

Well, do you know what- I was wrong.

The other week at Brownies, she was very excited at seeing a friend on the other side and ran across . None of the other mums could believe that my sensible girl had done something so foolish.

So, no- you can't say that categorically he won't run in the road.

No too young
and not fair on the shop keeper and passing adults to be feeling responsible for him.

But I'll 2nd what thegrammerpolice said about how you've handled your responses

Thanks all.

I didn't think it was an unquestionably good idea. The thought crossed my mind as it is the logical next step for him - he goes in to shops and pays for things himself, and when we were camping he wandered across to the shop on his own (in view, no roads!).

I'd wondered to what extent my reluctance was a result of the 'cotton-wool' approach, as to go to our shop he'd be in sight most of the time, and in a familiar environment, and around people who know him, but I agree he is too young to cope with unpredictable things, like wasps, dogs and so on, or even a person enquiring as to his welfare. And the road thing - it is right to say he could behave differently when I'm not there.

So it is a big step, and one I'll wait a while for.

I used to work in child protection, as a professional(ha)...anyway...I'm sorry but I think that age is far too young.

Doesn't matter how sensible they are, they are still only 4, 5, 6, whatever...

Sorry, havn't read thru others responses tho....not yet ..

4 is just too young. I’d say 7 is the minimum age to walk to the shop and buy something alone, but even I wouldn’t let a 7 year old do that. Think about possible dangers. He might see a dog on the other side of the road and want to say hello, he might see a friend and want to say hello, or he might see a toy car on the other pavement that he liked the look of. It doesn’t matter how sensible they are, or how sensible you think they are, all 4 year olds will probably still get distracted.

They send children on trains at 5-6 to school in Japan and on errands at 3/4 but there is an extremely low crime rate, I wouldn't send a child to the shop until they were about 6/ 7 with the distance your describing...

no way. 4 is too young. Why would you even get a 4 year old to go and buy something for you? And what would they even be buying? They might not understand money values, might drop some money/cash on the way there or back without knowing. They might see a chocolate bar and get that instead of what you want them too. Don’t let him go, even if you think he is sensible enough. And if you do let him, he could possibly be in danger and you would be taking a massive risk. Also, what if he falls over and cuts his knee, where would you be to help him?

Not at four years old, it's too young. Four year olds should be supervised.

Zombie thread resurrected thanks to the shit show of the site update.

The child is probably ok to go to the shop now, aged almost 18!

ZOMBIE THREAD
The OPs child is now 15/16 I'm sure they go to the shop alone by now!!

You are crazy

My dad nearly ran over a child of about 8 who ran across the road straight into the traffic.
I was allowed to go to the local shop when I was about that age so he was surprised at what she did but the mum who phoned him afterwards to thank him for taking the child back into school where she should have been said that she ran across the road to join a friend - not thinking of the traffic.
There is no way I would allow a 4 year old to do this.

Independence!!!! At 4

Far too young. No need for him to be that independent. Anything could arise. And it's not the shopkeepers job to look after him

zombie
child is now old enough!!
**
**

Absolutely not. Even very sensible children can see a ball bounce into the road and go after it.
way too risky.

@kyliewilson

no way. 4 is too young. Why would you even get a 4 year old to go and buy something for you? And what would they even be buying? They might not understand money values, might drop some money/cash on the way there or back without knowing. They might see a chocolate bar and get that instead of what you want them too. Don’t let him go, even if you think he is sensible enough. And if you do let him, he could possibly be in danger and you would be taking a massive risk. Also, what if he falls over and cuts his knee, where would you be to help him?

If he falls over and cuts his knee he could probably drive himself to the hospital this thread is so old 😆

I posted on this (with some very good advice ) 13 years ago when my oldest child was 5! And I had a non sleeping baby/toddler.
She’s now off in a pub somewhere and the baby is revising for her mocks 🤣

😂😂😂 he's 17 now so I'd say this is fine OP

Now come on @mnhq I would have thought reboot would have sirens and flashes going off on a zombie!

Absolutely not. 4yo’s no matter how “sensible” are not sensible. All it’d take is some opportunistic weirdo to notice he’s on his own or for him to see a friend over the road and run out without thinking. I live on the same road as my 6yo’s (almost 7yo) school, can see the entrance from my house and there’s a lollipop lady there as the junction gets really busy and gets packed really quickly as it’s a residential street, I still feel he’s too young to walk in on his own.

Oh wow didn’t realise this was such an old thread. Probably alright to trust him now lol

I'm far from overprotective but hell no. I wouldn't even a 6 year old do that. I believe in teaching independence but not like this at that age.

I dunno, at 17 I was still pretty careless…

Having watched an unaccompanied 4 year old rush out between parked cars to cross the road to his brother I would say never, ever in a million years. His parents thought he was safe because he knew not to cross the road. How wrong they were and they all paid the ultimate price as did the 18 year old driver who ended up in a psychiatric hospital as he couldn't live with what he'd done. The child literally ran into the wing of the car, the driver stood no chance of stopping. In court it was said that even the best trained police driver would not have been able to avoid killing the boy.

That accident happened when I was 17, I was stood in the kitchen at the sink when I watched it unfold, I was first on scene and it lives with me to this day. I am now 58.