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Parenting

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Original poster

Woman has just punched my son

152 replies

Hollowhead · 28/08/2008 18:03

My son came in with tears in his eyes a few minutes ago and a red mark on his face. Turns out he had a run in with a neighbours son (same age, 10) and threatened to punch him next time he saw him going to shop on his own the kid then went running in to his mum and told her what DS had said and she came out giving DS loads and saying he was the kind of kid that would end up in prison by the time he was 18 and she also said he and his friends were the reason another neighbour moved recently.

DS then retaliated and called her a fat ugly cow and said he was going to set their cat on fire she told him she was coming around to tell me what he'd said and would be reporting him to the police and ds said "go on then, I'll put your fucking windows through" so she said to him "come here and shout your mouth off, you think you're so big and clever" and so DS did and she grabbed hold of him and smacked him across the face (he said she punched him, she admits she slapped him, not punched). DS then tried to kick her and her husband came out and starting saying to his wife "keep him there, I'll knock his cocky fucking head off" and she then pushed DS over full force so he actually fell into the road and told him to "fuck off".

Obviously I went around to see what the hell has been happening and she said she pushed him away because if her husband had got a hold of him he would've killed him!

I KNOW ds is not innocent in this but to actually punch someone elses kid? Would I be over-reacting to report this to the police?

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 30/08/2008 11:53

KerryMum, the OP is a Troll.

scottishmummy · 30/08/2008 18:19

and not a very good troll either,troll if you wish but do try to be funny

qwertpoiuy · 30/08/2008 19:23

Op's spelling and grammar is too perfect for her to be so rough - definitely a troll.

SpandexIsMyEnemy · 30/08/2008 19:44

kerry mum - you go from one extream to the other - I recall a thread (i'm sure it was you who was defending a mother who was hitting her child several times at the bus stop) you can't have it both ways - being a parents doesn't give you the right to hit your child any more than a neighbour.

OP - what hecat said on the pretence this is real. but I think it's a troll.

Thinkstoomuch · 30/08/2008 20:18

Yes I remember that Kerrymum thread. Left a very bad taste in the mouth.

The OP has posted a handful of times, all this month, following a name change. I've a bad feeling this isn't a troll, in which case I'm sad that this (casual violence, abusive language, ugly attitude) is the reality of anyone's life. Very glad they're not my neighbours though.

KerryMum · 30/08/2008 21:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SpandexIsMyEnemy · 30/08/2008 21:56

piss off - in the first place where did I say this was your thread, or in deed the other one I said you were on a thread.

KerryMum · 30/08/2008 21:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SlartyBartFast · 30/08/2008 22:02

hide button

sushistar · 30/08/2008 23:54

at kerrymum. The kid was assulted by adults, the op's partner is about to assult some adults, the kid tried to kick the neighbour - everyone is assulting everyone, and it's ALL out of order. If it's real, that is. I think I would make my ds write (if he was able) a letter apologising to the neighbour, and when I dropped it round I would ask the neighbour (very politely and with many apologoes for my son's awful mouth) that if he did anything like it again could she come straight round and let me know so I could discipline him straight away, rather than her hitting him. That's what I'd do. And I'd buy her some flowers as a conciliatory gift.

sushistar · 30/08/2008 23:55

Reading that it suonds like I live in middle class cookoo land. I live in a rough patch o East London, and that's what I'd do. I bet it would work too.

Mamazon · 30/08/2008 23:56

JEEZ! where is this? Asbo land, chavsville?

callmeovercautious · 31/08/2008 00:10

I must live in cloud cookoo land because this would not happen where I live. If a child of that age was brawling and shouting like that a neighbour would have called either the Mother or the police. I know I am blessed. However if the OP is for real - you really need to get your family out of that area. If a grown woman can't deal with a cheeky/rude 10 year old without resorting to violence what will their Children grow up to be? In a few years it won't be arguements and punches it will be knives and guns.

Call me a dramatist but DH and I both come from that kind of background but got out. He used to have to run home from school when his family lived in London or he would be beaten up by kids from another school. It is possible to get out.

mel1981 · 31/08/2008 00:19

I would get involved if my son was 10 and got in an fight/arguement- i wouldnt punch or slap a kid but id try to break it up and take him out of the situation. I dont think its pathetic! I dont see the point in fighting especially at that age and wouldnt want my son or anybody elses for that fact come to harm for whatever reason. Threats like that are NOT normal behaviour. Sorry.

nappyaddict · 31/08/2008 02:39

if you call the police won't your ds be in trouble for verbally abusing and threatening the neighbour?

Morloth · 31/08/2008 09:13

Gawd, if I spoke to an adult neighbour like that I certainly wouldn't tell my mother!

The neighbour would have slapped me, and then marched me back to my mother by my ear, my mother would then have slapped me again, washed my mouth out with soap and I wouldn't have been allowed anywhere but school for WEEKS! She then would have made the neighbour a cup of tea and apologised.

Got to be a troll, got to be - I would be MORTIFIED if my son behaved like this.

ForeverOptimistic · 31/08/2008 09:54

She is trolling. If this was for real she would be typing in text speak.

KerryMum · 31/08/2008 11:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pagwatch · 31/08/2008 11:15

tbh Kerrymum
I am absoloutely on the floor with that you think the behaviour described by the OP is normal kids 'mouthing off'.

I am happy to say my DS1 is a 'perfect peter' if the alternative is accepting foul mouth threatening abuse from a ten year old.
If anyone thinks a ten year old talking like that is just one of those things we might as well all give up.

FWIW though I think any adult hitting a child is wrong wrong wrong.

KerryMum · 31/08/2008 11:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pagwatch · 31/08/2008 12:25

fair enough.

lowrib · 31/08/2008 14:11

The OP may well be a troll but please also consider that she might not be.

There really are neighbourhoods where this kind of behaviour is the norm. My exP?s family lived in a very rough area. Some things I saw there were really heartbreaking.

It wasn?t inner city ? worse for the people who live there I think, it was a small town surrounded by not much, where the jobs had been mainly in industry, and were now long gone, and so there has been very high unemployment there for a few generations.

We didn?t visit often ? my exP felt he had escaped, and didn?t enjoy going there, but when we did I came away saddened and depressed by things I saw, e.g. a stepmum repeatedly calling her 4 year old DSD ?you little bitch? as a term of ENDEARMENT my exP?s 14 year old niece coming round and demanding her uncle go and beat someone up for her (no one was shocked by the request - he declined BTW). I remember once apologising for carelessly lighting a cigarette near my exP?s cousin, who was 8 months pregnant, only to be laughed at by all the women as she got a cigarette out and lit her own. There was a general background level of violence, poverty, casual racism, petty crime, alcoholism and drug use among adults and children in the area. Men ? and women - are expected to defend their families with their fists.

They were always nice to me, but they scared the shit of me tbh. The whole thing was a big eye-opener. I certainly wouldn?t want to grow up and then bring my children up in an area like that, it can't be easy.

The kind of behaviour the OP describes would be totally normal in this area. I?m not saying it is justified on any level, but just that to dismiss the OP as a troll based on the situation as described might be rash.

I?m not going to get into giving advice on parenting though ? I am an expectant mum, so don?t feel qualified to comment yet!

QuintessentialShadow · 31/08/2008 14:18

Kerrymum, I am not surprised you find the kids behaviour normal. Bearing in mind you have actually had your windows done in the same manner, I am surprised you are now defending this kid. Especially as you recently defended a mum for repeatedly hitting a toddler on a bus stop.

PinkTulips · 31/08/2008 14:29

she should have been more grown up than to actually hit him but ffs!

the kid is behaving like a little chav and she's right, he is going to end up in prison or worse if you think it's ok for him to speak like that to anyone at all.

i've had to live on estates full of little gurriers like him and they make life hell for everyone around them

but then, if you really think what she did was so much worse than him threatening to beat kids up, hurt animals and destroy property then i guess we know where he learns this behaviour from

KerryMum · 31/08/2008 14:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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