I'm too affectionate with my baby?

[Babooah]

For a little context my mum was never affectionate. I have no memories of her ever hugging or kissing me (or my siblings) as a child, teenager or as an adult. She would write Love Mum in birthdays cards, but has never said I love you out loud. I don't even have memories of her saying she loved my dad or any past boyfriends. Apparently her parents were affectionate towards each other and to her and her sister if that matters.

She hated being touched in general.

My sister is very similar to her where she never kisses or hugs any of her children. I have never seen her play with her children. She has 6 children (4 years old to 15 years old). She acts more like a babysitter than their mum.

As I grew up, I felt very uncomfortable whenever someone gave me a hug. Especially if it was a woman. Now I still feel uncomfortable, but it feels more 'natural'.

I have a baby boy who is 6 months old. I want him to feel loved, so I give him hugs and kisses (cheeks, forehead and the top of his head) whenever I can. He could be sitting on my lap, playing with a toy, drinking from his bottle, napping etc and I will try and give him a hug or a kiss as much as possible. I also say I love you to him.

A friend came over the other day and commented that I am always hugging and kissing my baby and said I'm too affectionate towards him.

Can you be too affectionate towards a baby?

You're doing fine, ignore your friend

Your friend is a knob. And it's perfectly fine to kiss your child on the lips too.

Agree with above poster!! Absolutely carry on what you’re doing! I’m the same!

No, I have a 9 month old and give him all the kisses and hugs and cuddles he will tolerate. What damage do they think it'll do? Or maybe your friend meant it as a compliment? Or perhaps they're just not used to seeing you be so affectionate and didn't mean anything by it.

Your friend is weird, children deserve all the cuddles and kisses their parents can give them.

No. Kiss your baby as much as you want.

Your friend is talking bollocks. It sounds like you are showing your baby what a loving, happy parent is.

Ask your friend what hurt her into that attitude.

No such thing as being too affectionate with your baby, I do the same!

I cant't begin to imagine why your DF made that comment

Enjoy all the cuddles, kisses, stroking your little ones hands ~ I used to love kissing the little one's feet when they were on the changing mat!

My friends daughter caught cold sores this way. Very dangerous.

Your friend is a mum and your mum sounds similar. You cannot love a child too much, only too little.

As long as you're not forcing it on him i.e. you stop if he pushes you off (it gets more pronounced as they get older!) Fill your boots. You can never cuddle and kiss a child too much.

My 16 month old now finds it hilarious to run away giggling if I ask for a kiss or a cuddle. My 6 year old is more compliant and therefore my favourite (actual jokes before anyone comes at me).

And we say I love you at a minimum, before bed and before leaving the house, and spontaneously many times in between.

Just you carry on the way you are. Who can resist baby cuddles and kisses 😘

DH and I were (and still are) both super affectionate towards DD from birth. I have told her I love her every day of her life at least once, often multiple times. Lots of cuddles, kisses, hugs. At 18 she is a secure, well adjusted young woman and still gives us both hugs, says good night and gives me a hug and kiss every night she’s at home, texts to say good night and ‘love you mum’ if she’s at a friends. As the child of a cold mother who never said she loved me or showed any affection after I was school age, I’ve made it my mission to be the opposite. There is no such thing as being too affectionate or showing too much love. Your ds will likely be a secure adult able to show affection to his partners and children. You’re going great. Your friend is not.

Aw you kiss your baby as much as you like. I still remember all those lovely kisses and cuddles. Mine are grown up now so I just kiss the dogs too much instead 😂

Well yes it can be dangerous if you have cold sores, but not everyone has cold sores.

Your friend is a plonker

The kisses and the cuddles are the best part of having a baby. They need affection, it's how their brains are wired to grow. They need love and attachment to develop.

Your mum, sister and friend are the outliers here. Your mum's behaviour verges on emotional abuse.

You are doing everything right OP.
Every time you kiss, cuddle and speak lovingly to your baby you are building that solid loving trusting relationship that every child deserves.
You can never ever be too affectionate it helps with brain development too. So much research has gone into this,
it's responsive parenting and I'm so happy to hear you aren't listening to ill informed people who say this is wrong.
Enjoy all those kisses and cuddles it's a magical time.

He’s a baby- he thrives on love. When he’s 14 he might not be so keen so make the most of it ☺️👍. What your friend said is odd IMO.

You love your little baby so of course you want him to feel loved! Because he is! Ignore your odd friend as other posters have pointed out. The classic tale of people taking out their own insecurities on others.

I didn’t have affectionate parents, but I kiss and cuddle my DC lots. You never know what tomorrow may bring, I want them to know every day how much I love them. I don’t care what anyone else thinks

I miss the days when DSs would welcome kisses and cuddles and expressions of love. Thankfully the dog doesn’t find it embarrassing.

Sounds a lucky baby, lots of lovely eye contact and speech and they are having the best start 💐 You sound a lovely Mum