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Original poster

Unfortunately can’t go on holiday because of cruise lines policy

648 replies

CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 11:24

Hi all,

just wanted other peoples opinions please as it’s really getting to me.
So a cruise was booked for my dads partners 70th all paid for by him as he wanted us all to go, which was extremely generous from the start.
A few days ago we found out I can no longer go as will be 24 weeks pregnant and the cruise line won’t accept pregnant ladies at 24 weeks pregnant or more.
Very upset and disappointed by the news but stated my partner and our son along with my 2 girls from a previous relationship could all still go which only leaves me missing out.
Partner then states he wouldn’t be taking our 2 year old son as he would be too much hassle and wouldn’t be able to enjoy himself and relax, his he grandad who paid for the holiday also agrees with this. I am very upset and saddened that my little boy would be such an inconvenience to them.
Also to add to this my father in law decides to invite his friends instead which also means my girls missing out too. I know he paid for all this so it’s his decision but still upsetting to let them down.
So basically now my partner is still going, along with his father in law, wife and his friends and me, my son and my girls are left at home on a holiday we were supposed to go on.
Am I being unreasonable to kick up a fuss about this? How would other people feel?

Thank you in advance

OP posts:
WhatMyNameis · 21/07/2025 20:09

Biids · 21/07/2025 19:45

i am not surprised they didn’t want to take the 2yo. A holiday with a 2yo isn’t actually a break. You need to not take that personally. All 2yo are an inconvenience.

I took my 3 month old and 13 month old to Cyprus with my husband. Was a glorious break.

We have since taken them abroad every year bar covid and it just got better and better.

Showing my kids the world has made me appreciate things in a different way.

I don't know where this rhetoric came from that you don't/can't enjoy spending time with little kids but it needs to stop.

party4you · 21/07/2025 20:09

ALPS100 · 21/07/2025 19:26

It is her partner's dad's partner who has the birthday.

Not HER dad.

or HIS dad.

Christ alive - it’s been said 100 times it’s her partners dad.

party4you · 21/07/2025 20:12

party4you · 21/07/2025 20:08

Maybe the FIL genuinely had a change of heart. It’s so hard to know because the OP will probs add 3 more plot lines soon.

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He also might have wanted it to be adults originally but knew he couldn’t just invite OP and her DP and not their kids. There’s so many other sides to the story.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

2 year olds 2nd trimester Families General pregnancy
Feelinglost10 · 21/07/2025 20:15

HappilyUrbanTrimmer · 21/07/2025 11:47

This nails it

You were only invited to provide childcare for the 2yo grandchild. Your older daughters were only invited as they come as a package with you. You are not considered a true member of this fanily and your "partner" (not actually a partner, sorry) doesn't give a shit about you or his child.

End the relationship. Prioritise your children. Don't start looking fir a new partner for a while, but when you do for heaven's sake don't consider them to be a partner if they don't have a deep commitment to living in a genuine partnership with you. This specimen barely qualified as a boyfriend. It's clearly a very casual thing for him.

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People can’t keep telling everyone to end their relationships on here 😂 she’s in a family and pregnant with his child. It’s a argument that she needs a opinion on, not telling her to breakup 🙈

FeetLikeFlippers · 21/07/2025 20:18

StellaAndCrow · 21/07/2025 11:33

I'm sorry. It shows what they expected your role on the holiday to be!

This! Everyone else seems to be missing the point. The issue is not with the cruise line’s policy but the reaction of the OP’s partner and FIL.

Maddy70 · 21/07/2025 20:22

You are being daft. They invited you and paid for you but you can't go , they want their son there but they don't want to be babysitting on his big birthday holiday.

They aren't being unreasonable TBF it's just unfortunate they would have expected to have some time with their son , but now if he has sole care of the children then that won't happen

Original poster
CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 20:24

@LiquoriceAllsorts2my father in law knew I was pregnant, he booked and paid for it last month. He declared I was pregnant at the time of booking and nothing more was said. It was only last week they emailed a form for us to fill in where we found out about the policy which states a pregnant lady cannot travel at 24 weeks or more so no refund as was our fault can only name change x

OP posts:
IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 21/07/2025 20:25

BuffaloCauliflower · 21/07/2025 11:47

He won’t have sole responsibility though, other adults will be there, like the kids grandad

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Why should the other adults be responsible for the OP's and her husband's children?

LondonLady1980 · 21/07/2025 20:27

I’m so confused as to whose birthday it is?

OP’s dad?
OP’s partner’s dad?
The partner of OP’s dad?
The partner of OP’s partner’s dad?

We need a family tree diagram or something 🤣

I’ve re-read OP’s posts more than once and I’m still confused 🤣

Can you make up some names OP and attribute them to people, and then tell us whose birthday it is? It’s so much easier to use names in situations like this rather people being referred to as just dad, dad in law, partner etc.

So what’s your pretend name OP?
What is your partner’s pretend name?
What’s the pretend name of your partner’s dad? - and what’s the pretend name of his partner?

And of all those names, whose birthday is it???! 🤣

IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 21/07/2025 20:27

FeetLikeFlippers · 21/07/2025 20:18

This! Everyone else seems to be missing the point. The issue is not with the cruise line’s policy but the reaction of the OP’s partner and FIL.

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No, the issue is with her partner. Why on earth should the other adults be expected to take on her and his childcare duties?

FancyOliveHiker · 21/07/2025 20:27

Chewbecca · 21/07/2025 11:37

What would you like to have happened?
For them to rearrange the trip? Presumably that isn't really an option as it is all booked and it is his birthday at that time.
For your partner to drop out? It's a bit unnecessary for him to miss his Dad's birthday.
For him to take your 2 year old (& the birthday guy's GS) - yes, I think that is a reasonable ask. Would your 2 year old be ok going without you?

What other issues do you have with the situation, I am not quite clear.

I think I would sift your grumbles into reasonable and unreasonable ones.

From reading the OP post, It's actually her dad and it's his partner who's having the 70th birthday.

cinnamongirl123 · 21/07/2025 20:28

I’m sorry in advance OP as I’m going to be blunt. Your partner is an absolute prick. You can’t go, so he cancels the trip for his son and your two daughters? No, that’s absolutely unacceptable. That is so hurtful and disappointing to them. You don’t UNinvite children from trips that they had been looking forward to, for no good reason. Not wanting to look after children on his own on a boat with lots of activities and other adults who can help, is NOT a good reason - as he is now leaving YOU to look after 3 children on your own! Three bored, disappointed children at home - and whilst you’re too pregnant to be allowed on the cruise!!

The whole thing boggles my mind! What sort of man does this? Not a good one, I’ll tell you that for nothing.

As PP have observed, your H clearly sees you as some sort of nanny, not as someone who deserves consideration. He doesnt care about his son, your daughters or you. He has disappointed the kids, and dumped you as a pregnant woman to look after 3 kids alone while he has a holiday. Unbelievable OP.

LondonLady1980 · 21/07/2025 20:29

IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 21/07/2025 20:27

No, the issue is with her partner. Why on earth should the other adults be expected to take on her and his childcare duties?

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They shouldn’t, but OP’s partner should take on the responsibility of looking after his own children as opposed to deciding it’s too much like hard work and say he’s not taking them.

AngelicKaty · 21/07/2025 20:29

LondonLady1980 · 21/07/2025 20:27

I’m so confused as to whose birthday it is?

OP’s dad?
OP’s partner’s dad?
The partner of OP’s dad?
The partner of OP’s partner’s dad?

We need a family tree diagram or something 🤣

I’ve re-read OP’s posts more than once and I’m still confused 🤣

Can you make up some names OP and attribute them to people, and then tell us whose birthday it is? It’s so much easier to use names in situations like this rather people being referred to as just dad, dad in law, partner etc.

So what’s your pretend name OP?
What is your partner’s pretend name?
What’s the pretend name of your partner’s dad? - and what’s the pretend name of his partner?

And of all those names, whose birthday is it???! 🤣

It's the 70th birthday of OP's FIL's partner. HTH. 😊

TipsyFairyHic · 21/07/2025 20:29

CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 20:24

@LiquoriceAllsorts2my father in law knew I was pregnant, he booked and paid for it last month. He declared I was pregnant at the time of booking and nothing more was said. It was only last week they emailed a form for us to fill in where we found out about the policy which states a pregnant lady cannot travel at 24 weeks or more so no refund as was our fault can only name change x

So a cruise was booked for my dads partners 70th all paid for by him as he wanted us all to go, which was extremely generous from the start.

You mean you FIL's partner.
Your FIL booked the cruise for her. Yes?

Or his 70th?

So confusing.

I don't think a child of two is old enough to go on a cruise with adults.
Their needs are totally different.

IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 21/07/2025 20:30

LondonLady1980 · 21/07/2025 20:29

They shouldn’t, but OP’s partner should take on the responsibility of looking after his own children as opposed to deciding it’s too much like hard work and say he’s not taking them.

Edited
Show quote history

You mean the OP's partner?

LondonLady1980 · 21/07/2025 20:31

FancyOliveHiker · 21/07/2025 20:27

From reading the OP post, It's actually her dad and it's his partner who's having the 70th birthday.

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Both of OP’s parents have passed away so it’s definitely not her dad.

I thought it was the girlfriend of her partner’s dad who was having the birthday party?

(I don’t think OP is married as she uses the word partner instead of husband when referring to the father of their joint son).

TipsyFairyHic · 21/07/2025 20:32

I thought it was the girlfriend of her partner’s dad who was having the birthday party?

That's what she says , if that's what she means.

ExercicenformedeZ · 21/07/2025 20:32

FancyOliveHiker · 21/07/2025 20:27

From reading the OP post, It's actually her dad and it's his partner who's having the 70th birthday.

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OFFS

LondonLady1980 · 21/07/2025 20:32

IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 21/07/2025 20:30

You mean the OP's partner?

Show quote history

Yes, lol.

The confusion in the thread has made me muddled and crazy 🤣

TipsyFairyHic · 21/07/2025 20:33

@FancyOliveHiker If you read ALL by OP she's cleared that one up- it's her FIL

Original poster
CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 20:35

@Maddy70its surprising that you see it as babysitting, it’s called parenting his own child. The fact is they just don’t want the inconvenience of him.
Would you be happy not to invite your own children and grandchildren on a family holiday because they are a hassle?

OP posts:
LondonLady1980 · 21/07/2025 20:36

TipsyFairyHic · 21/07/2025 20:33

@FancyOliveHiker If you read ALL by OP she's cleared that one up- it's her FIL

It’s the partner of the FIL.

FIL has paid for the trip but it’s to celebrate the birthday of his partner.

IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 21/07/2025 20:38

CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 20:35

@Maddy70its surprising that you see it as babysitting, it’s called parenting his own child. The fact is they just don’t want the inconvenience of him.
Would you be happy not to invite your own children and grandchildren on a family holiday because they are a hassle?

The problem is your partner. It's not the grandparents' responsibility to look after his children.

Original poster
CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 20:41

@AngelicKatyi made a mistake on my original post by putting my dads partner instead of my partners dad!
To clarify it’s my partners father who has booked and paid for the trip call his Brian. I referred to him as my father in law.

OP posts: