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Original poster

Unfortunately can’t go on holiday because of cruise lines policy

648 replies

CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 11:24

Hi all,

just wanted other peoples opinions please as it’s really getting to me.
So a cruise was booked for my dads partners 70th all paid for by him as he wanted us all to go, which was extremely generous from the start.
A few days ago we found out I can no longer go as will be 24 weeks pregnant and the cruise line won’t accept pregnant ladies at 24 weeks pregnant or more.
Very upset and disappointed by the news but stated my partner and our son along with my 2 girls from a previous relationship could all still go which only leaves me missing out.
Partner then states he wouldn’t be taking our 2 year old son as he would be too much hassle and wouldn’t be able to enjoy himself and relax, his he grandad who paid for the holiday also agrees with this. I am very upset and saddened that my little boy would be such an inconvenience to them.
Also to add to this my father in law decides to invite his friends instead which also means my girls missing out too. I know he paid for all this so it’s his decision but still upsetting to let them down.
So basically now my partner is still going, along with his father in law, wife and his friends and me, my son and my girls are left at home on a holiday we were supposed to go on.
Am I being unreasonable to kick up a fuss about this? How would other people feel?

Thank you in advance

OP posts:
Isntiticonic · 21/07/2025 19:25

I would be worried sick if my 3 children where on a cruise ship without me, also I would rather stick needles in my eyes then take a 2 year old baby on a cruise ship alone, yes there may be other family but at their age they're hardly fit or inclined to spend a once in a lift time celebration cruise supervising a baby whilst the mother is sat at home.

Original poster
CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 19:25

@llizziethank you for your comment.
My partners parents are not short of money as they paid for this cruise outright last month. We have now been part of their family for 10 years. Myself and my 2 daughters have always been welcomed as part of the family from the start, which was amazing.
when he booked the holiday they asked if anyone was pregnant and he said yes and no more was said until last week when they sent a form for us to fill in which states a pregnant lady can under no circumstances cruise if you are 24 weeks pregnant or more.
Just gutted with the whole situation really.
I am now looking at taking the kids on holiday by myself in England whilst they go and keep us occupied x

OP posts:
Blobbitymacblob · 21/07/2025 19:26

Ask your fil how he’s going to break it to the girls that they’re uninvited, and tell him you just couldn’t bear to tell them, and that it will have to come from him.

Let him squirm a bit.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

2 year olds 2nd trimester Families General pregnancy
ALPS100 · 21/07/2025 19:26

It is her partner's dad's partner who has the birthday.

Not HER dad.

or HIS dad.

SmurfnoffIce · 21/07/2025 19:26

I find it odd that you even want your two year-old to go without you, to be honest. It’s not like they’re going for a couple of nights. It seems a long time to be away from a child that young.

PixelPanda · 21/07/2025 19:26

Im sorry, this sucks. If it was me in this position I wouldn’t be happy. It’s a difficult situation but I don’t think you should “uninvite” people on holiday. The girls are old enough to feel rejected and disappointed. I would expect my partner to still take my 2 year old, especially if I’m pregnant. Hope you manage to move past this x

MaryGreenhill · 21/07/2025 19:27

Your DP is being a knob head.
Nothing to do with anyone else .

Isthisreasonable · 21/07/2025 19:27

Milosc · 21/07/2025 15:49

Just so you know the teens would no longer be able to be in an adjoining room if you are not there unless your partner is now their legal guardian/parent by law. The rules state that if you are not travelling with your parent then you have to have someone 18 or 21 (depending on cruise ports) or older in the cabin with the children along with an authorized letter from the parent. Children under
18/21 are not allowed in a cabin by themselves if their parent is not on board in an adjoining/adjacent room. We are taking a cruise in two weeks with teens (ours and their friends) and the rules are very specific. So even if your kids did go they would have to share a room with your partner which seems awkward at best.

@Milosc does this mean you can't take your kid's friends unless their parents go too?

Zanatdy · 21/07/2025 19:30

LIZS · 21/07/2025 19:11

Ah your update makes more sense now. Your dds are not deemed part if the family without you. They should have been clear it was adults only from the outset. Seems odd they seem able to swap children’s places to adults.

They will pay the extra. The girls would have paid at adult fare anyway at their age and the company will be more than happy to invoice them for the extra charge for child’s place to adult.

Isthisreasonable · 21/07/2025 19:34

ShallIstart · 21/07/2025 16:15

Surely, if you are going on holiday as a group and then the parent can't go, the group doesn't take the children anyway.
This really ia all on OP and her partner as they got pregnant knowing this big holiday had been booked and paid for and not looking into the regulations or thinking through.
I can see why the father in law who is also not a biological grandad to the girls, wants to enjoy the expensive cruise holiday with friends rather than with two teens who is not related to and a 2 year old who can't even enjoy any of it and won't remember it while the mother stays at home.
It was a generous offer to start with, he doesnt want to chaperone the teens or babysit on his 70th birthday. He has still said to his son he can come alone, which is fair enough.
The OPs partner should go alone, it will be two weeks of a life, nothing really. And he will get to celebrate his dads 70th with him. She can bank it as a nice holiday with the girls or her mum at later date.

Edited
Show quote history

What makes you think he'll look after the kids so she can go away?

ExercicenformedeZ · 21/07/2025 19:34

ALPS100 · 21/07/2025 19:26

It is her partner's dad's partner who has the birthday.

Not HER dad.

or HIS dad.

No, it isn't!

gardenflowergirl · 21/07/2025 19:37

CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 16:56

@VickyEadieofThighthis is the policy and they were booked into their own cabin.

Thing is, a stepfather isn't necessarily a legal guardian just because you married him. He would need a court order or to adopt your children to be their legal guardian. This may have come up and required proof, so easier to not have them go than bring this up with you.

Pinty · 21/07/2025 19:38

DiscoBob · 21/07/2025 11:43

You certainly can't complain as it was a ridiculously generous offer in the first place. He filled the empty spaces with his friends, which is also fair enough.

It sounds like a shame for you and the kids but they couldn't have been expected to cancel the whole thing just to make a point in solidarity with you over the pregnancy rule.

No but her husband could have taken the children.

llizzie · 21/07/2025 19:40

CAMO1984 · 21/07/2025 19:25

@llizziethank you for your comment.
My partners parents are not short of money as they paid for this cruise outright last month. We have now been part of their family for 10 years. Myself and my 2 daughters have always been welcomed as part of the family from the start, which was amazing.
when he booked the holiday they asked if anyone was pregnant and he said yes and no more was said until last week when they sent a form for us to fill in which states a pregnant lady can under no circumstances cruise if you are 24 weeks pregnant or more.
Just gutted with the whole situation really.
I am now looking at taking the kids on holiday by myself in England whilst they go and keep us occupied x

I think that you should take some time to book a holiday in the UK..

The stress you are under now is bad enough, but to add to that the stress of finding a suitable holiday for you and the three children is not really advisable.

Find a holiday for you and the children by all means, but spend time on planning it, when you are calmer and more sure of yourself. Involve the girls in it too, the better for them to enjoy something they have had a part in planning.

I would be inclined to book an English waterways cruise if you can afford it, but whatever it is you choose, make it start when his cruise is almost over and he can sit and 'twiddle his thumbs', do his dirty laundry, clean the house and so on.

Biids · 21/07/2025 19:45

i am not surprised they didn’t want to take the 2yo. A holiday with a 2yo isn’t actually a break. You need to not take that personally. All 2yo are an inconvenience.

ScribblingPixie · 21/07/2025 19:46

That is such a shame, but I think your daughters as well as the two-year-old are safer with you. Cruise ships aren't the most benign environment.Your partner's reaction isn't very impressive. Only you know how to react to that.

anon666 · 21/07/2025 19:48

Yanbu. If they kids dont go, dh doesn't go. Surprised they didn't see that coming.

Dh is an arsehole for even trying this on while you're pg

anon666 · 21/07/2025 19:48

Yanbu. If they kids dont go, dh doesn't go. Surprised they didn't see that coming.

Dh is an arsehole for even trying this on while you're pg

WhatMyNameis · 21/07/2025 19:56

Yuk. Why is the bar so low for men? My husband wouldn't dream of going, well maybe if he was taking all the kids (which, my God, how is that a problem?) I could have tried to force him, but leaving me pregnant at home? No way.

LucyMonth · 21/07/2025 19:58

WhatMyNameis · 21/07/2025 19:56

Yuk. Why is the bar so low for men? My husband wouldn't dream of going, well maybe if he was taking all the kids (which, my God, how is that a problem?) I could have tried to force him, but leaving me pregnant at home? No way.

It’s his fathers 70th birthday trip.

He isn’t taking all the kids because 2 of them are not his kids. It’s weird to take 2 teenager girls in a cruise ship with a family they aren’t actually related to.

She much safer pregnant at home than she ever would have been pregnant pn the cruise ship at 24 weeks!

ExercicenformedeZ · 21/07/2025 20:03

anon666 · 21/07/2025 19:48

Yanbu. If they kids dont go, dh doesn't go. Surprised they didn't see that coming.

Dh is an arsehole for even trying this on while you're pg

It's his father's birthday! OP doesn't just get to dictate the terms of the event like that. These responses are ridiculous and those of us who are being more measured are derided as 'handmaidens' by people who have an agenda. OP would be very foolish to listen to these people.

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 21/07/2025 20:04

To be honest if I was your fil, I would be annoyed at you and your partner for creating this mess by getting pregnant when he’s paid a lot of money for a cruise. You created this so need to accept the consequences that you and your children can’t go.
I do also think your partner should not go as well and let another friend go in his place.

WhatMyNameis · 21/07/2025 20:05

LucyMonth · 21/07/2025 19:58

It’s his fathers 70th birthday trip.

He isn’t taking all the kids because 2 of them are not his kids. It’s weird to take 2 teenager girls in a cruise ship with a family they aren’t actually related to.

She much safer pregnant at home than she ever would have been pregnant pn the cruise ship at 24 weeks!

Show quote history

It’s his fathers 70th birthday trip. - Yeah, I promise I trumped his dad when I was pregnant. His mum too.

He isn’t taking all the kids because 2 of them are not his kids. It’s weird to take 2
teenager girls in a cruise ship with a family they aren’t actually related to. Was more thinking that he won't take his own kid because it's too much hassle, yuk, yuk, yuk! I had to fight my husband to "get a turn" of my kids, he, as he should, loved every minute he could get with them.

She much safer pregnant at home than she ever would have been pregnant pn the cruise ship at 24 weeks! Exactly, everyone just stay home and say, not this time, sorry this trip doesn't fit into our family life at the moment.

party4you · 21/07/2025 20:08

Tiswa · 21/07/2025 18:16

Why he said it was too much hassle
to take his son. Too much hassle - not that his Dad decided but too much hassle

and actually the partner should have pushed for his children to go he didn’t want to because he didn’t want too

it would be a dealbreaker the moment he said too much hassle

Show quote history

Maybe the FIL genuinely had a change of heart. It’s so hard to know because the OP will probs add 3 more plot lines soon.

IOSTT · 21/07/2025 20:09

Your partner is a turd 💩- happy for you to look after your shared son but won’t look after his own son himself - now you know what he thinks of you