6-8 year old parenting club birthday partys, homework and extracurricular decisions

[2in2022twoyearson]

Hi,
Anyone want to join me navigating this age of parenting? Children could be outside this age bracket.

There's lots of baby toddler advice groups and some teen groups but this age I feel a bit in the dark.

I have a soon to be 7 year old girl. She's amazing, loves school, but I often feel like I'm doing or saying the wrong thing to and with her. She's going through a stroppy stage, finds school tiring.

Me and her dad work a lot and we haven't signed her up to many extra curriculum clubs, some of her peers have done loads since reception.

We're planning her birthday party and she has lots of opinions about it, I'm feeling the pressure!

I might get her assessed but I know speech and language services are not very good here. I had a Portuguese a colleague with an autistic preschooler who saw speech and language, they gave her exceseses at home to do but she didn't know she was doing them right. Then she went home to Portugal for a month or so and had proper sessions with a speech and language therapist and made great progress, regressed again coming to England. We'll try some things at home and pay attention to her lisp without making it a big deal. Then maybe when she's 8 in a couple of months and still has a lisp we'll try and get her assessed. But I don't have much faith. I don't think there's many SALT. My DH works with some in a special needs school so we might have the tools to help her without an assessment.

I was looking at videos if her when she was 3 and she had such interest in the alphabet and knew all the letters and phonics, but her lisp was pronounced and I didn't think much at the time. My 3 year old now is much clearer but has not much interest in the alphabet and phonics.

Glad it's calmed down with the fighting

I messaged her teacher to ask if she's noticed a lisp. Teacher offered a speachlink assessment through the school... but my husband doesn't want to because it could draw attention to it for her and take her out of lessons. I'm a bit annoyed he doesn't want to as he's like this with so many things. It is very mild and possibly a cold is making it more audible. But I do think a quick screening could reassure me that her speech is ok.

Your husband is being a bit silly, they don't care about being pulled out of lessons at this age!

Yeah I do think he's being silly, but my daughter didn't really like being taken out to go to the dentist over lunchtime missing or my missing school for illness. I do find it annoying when I see his parents attitude in him, which he has realised has been detrimental to his brother. His brother is disabled, medically and mentally, but his parents didn't want him stigmatized and were scared he would be taken into an institution. So tried to do what they could at home to help him. So he was only classified as learning difficulties, which caused lots of issues for him as an adult living with his parents. He's now been classified as disabled, but he was a young adult during lockdown so it was a slow process.

My dd isn't disabled but I'm seeing the same attitude. I was annoyed by his response because maybe in just anxious but having a screening and showing she doing have an issue would be reassuring. I do want to talk about it again, but it's not causing her issues in not sure it's the hill I want to die on.

Maybe ask him how it might affect her if speech issues continue as she gets older, likely to be more upsetting than being pulled out of class.

I'm starting to think I need to ask about possible adhd when DS has his 1st grade check up. His forgetfulness just seems way out of the norm for his age. A couple of days ago he forgot to get dressed and went to school in his pyjamas! He's constantly forgetting coats, hats, gloves, books, backpack, homework, helmet (because of the last one he now has a bike riding ban). He doesn't focus on anything for long except gaming, very easily distracted, and he hasn't grown out of his facial tics yet, seem a bit worse lately.

Naksuku. I remember finding out at school that I had my pyjamas still on under my pyjamas.

Under my school uniform that should say. Seems like a sensible thing to bring up in a check.

He's worn his pyjamas under his clothes plenty of times but completely forgetting to put clothes on is a new record

How are you getting on? DD was emotional yesterday afternoon walking home from school. I was embarrassed as she came out and started arguing about the snack I bought and crying that her brother was eating an apple they're better than bananas... then, quite subtly hitting, shaking and kicking at the buggy in the playground, and stopping with her arms crossed. Worried to walk past the teachers at the gate, all stroppy and teary so hid in my armpit. She used to do this a few years ago regularly. At times like this I feel like she's very different to other children who come out and hug their parents hello. She does hug me and give me affection but, often in the evening.

She just said she's very tired, but did mention something small about school, a timetable change. I decided to message her teacher because she isn't often upset after school. On reflection, she most likely is very tiered and will appreciate the bank holiday weekend. Wish I hadn't worried her. I tried to make it light and not accusatory, she's a lovely teacher.

Tiredness can make them so grumpy, DS hates everything when he's tired - today he kicked and slapped the wall because it was time to go to football practice but he hadn't finished cleaning up his toys yet and I told him he couldn't have an ice cream until he had done his cleaning. Long weekend will hopefully help.

DS's teacher has been giving him harder maths and language tests than the rest of the class because the normal ones are too easy for him but he's still complaining they are too easy (he does still make mistakes though so I don't think they're far too easy).
He's got his check up next week so going to ask about ADHD screening then. His snoring seems to have stopped though, so the tonsil surgery seems to have been a success!

Glad his tonsil surgery went well. We are back around to nearly birthday time. DD shares her birthday with her best friend so a few months ago I asked his mum if we should do a joint party. She was keen and said how they were thinking of going to the same play centre they went to last year. Last year it was just her and him. Nearly an hour's drive, but you spend the day there. I asked DD and she didn't want to do that for her birthday. She has many ideas and opinions.

So speaking to his parents again I suggested some of them. Didn't get a response. Then we found the perfect one. DD suggested going to the local museum which has lovely grounds they can safely have some independence running around in. So I looked at the events and there was a bushcraft session. DD, DH and I thought it looked perfect. So messaged friend. But her DS is set on going to the play centre with their 3rd friend in their group, and she suggested do the museum another time. I have said the bushcraft date can't be changed, they can't do the other weekend day, but I'm hoping they can do the weekend before their birthday.

I don't mind if they have separate parties, but it would be a shame if they couldn't go to each others parties if they are on the same day. Deciding what to do for birthday parties and planning them is so stressful. Esspecaly as the children now have opinions on what they want to do. Maybe next year we can do a joint one. I thought it would be easier

Joint parties don't tend to work once children starting having their own opinions on what to do! Hopefully you can figure out a way to do both things.

DS has his first football match of the season today, him and OH just left but I'm not going with them, too tired after taking the kids hiking in a national park yesterday, and I've got things I need to do at home anyway. DS decided to drink the lake water when we stopped for lunch today so hoping he doesn't get sick!

School finished here on Saturday and DS won an award for maths. And his report stated that he needs support with being trustworthy and reliable, which makes sense considering how frequently he forgets things like homework and school books. Not great for following rules either, really hope that improves next year.

We're off on holiday to the UK tomorrow, will have a very very long day travelling tomorrow as our flight isn't until midnight our time and arrives 3am our time, then another couple of hours in the car. I don't know how DS will cope, really hoping he sleeps on the plane and in the car but without his high backed booster I'm not so sure about the car (my mum has got a booster seat for him but its just the seat, not a high backed one)

Enjoy your holiday. My daughter could never sleep in a high backed booster, only the toddler car seats that like cradle them more

Hi, are you having a good summer holidays? DD has her birthday this weekend. We decided on booking a family bushcraft event at the local museum for her and 3 friends. It's going to be hot. There's so much on locally at the moment and she has assessment week this week. She's actually noticing it's a test now. There's a village family event Tomorrow evening 7-9. Originally DD didn't want to go, but now her best friend is going she does...I said we'll see how we feel.but we're so busy.

Hope she has a lovely birthday.

Our holiday is going OK, we're travelling a lot and DS has managed to sleep a bit leaning on my shoulder in the car. He's had so many fun things to do - over the last few days we've been to Wookey Hole, Longleat, Oxford and Cambridge! Now back to the seaside and hopefully swimming.

How are you, are you still in the UK or have you escaped to somewhere cooler? My dds school is one of the few schools round here stayed open as they have Aircon.

I'm pregnant with baby number 3. I've just had information from school that next academic year, 29th September there's a school trip to the museum. I haven't volunteered on a school trip and would like to, but I'll be 31 weeks pregnant so could be hell, specifically the 40 minute couch journeys.

Just left the UK this morning - the heat really got to me this week!

Congrats on baby number 3! I would not commit to 40 minute coach trip when you'll be 31 weeks, might be horrible.

Thanks yes, pretty unprecedented heat. DD seemed to cope with it better than us. We put kids to bed later as upstairs was hot and they played out in the pool, and little brother we aimed for him to have an afternoon nap but it didn't always happen! It's supposed to cool down tomorrow. Is your home cool?

We've got air conditioning downstairs so it's nice and cool and upstairs isn't so bad at the moment, window open all night helps

DS did not cope well with the heat, made him sick and grumpy

It's cooled down today and all my daughter's emotions have come out. She was stroppy this morning and I didn't pull her up on rudeness as we were allredy late for school.

After school, she came out fine, I reminded her of this morning and said throwing her hairbrush was unacceptable. Then she said she'd had a bad day at school, and got stroppy when I asked why. On the way home id promised both kids and icepop and cake.

Ay home she got stroppy again about a misunderstanding when I was getting out the ice pack and shouted fine and threw her school bag across the room nearly knocking brother over so I said no snack except fruit, she can wait until dinner. Then she started crying making excuses saying she didn't mean to throw her bag, first because she was out of control, then that she swung the wrong arm. Thing is she doesn't behave this way around her dad or other adults.

I walked her to her room. Her room is a mess so she didn't like that, plus I stripped her bed earlier but not remade it. She started retching, forcing out her tears and I said she could come down when she's calm. 5 minutes later she was quiet curled on the sofa and invited brother up for a cuddle that he wanted. Then asked if I could cuddle them both. But when DS climbed onto my lap cried that she can't be on my lap, ds went back to toys and we had a cuddle. She seems ok, and I think I did everything right, not accepting rude and aggressive behaviour, but it is exhausting.

How are you? DD finished for the summer holidays yesterday. She's been anxious about it ending and was crying coming out because a craft broke, but really she's going to miss her teacher. A friend told me as I walked up to collect her. Then on the playground when she'd stopped came over and patted her on the back. It was a slow walk out as all the yr 6s were lined up to say bye to the school but DD wasn't in the mood. At the gates shed stopped crying, I asked if she wanted to say bye to friends but she didn't. Then the same friend caught up with us behind and we overheard him talking to his mum asking why DD was crying "my craft broke a bit but I didn't cry about it" which set DD off again. 😭 I'm hoping for a fun and relaxed summer holidays!

Hope your summer is fun and relaxed! After a long school year its understandable to be sensitive and easily upset.

DS has been naughty so much this summer, keeps getting grounded. He's off to scout camp tomorrow, hopefully he'll behave there! Bit anxious about him going to such a big camp (about 5000 scouts) but DD had a blast there at his age.
Not much left of the holidays here, we're going to Helsinki for the weekend in a week's time which will be nice.

My daughter had a vomiting bug Friday night, she finished school Wednesday lunchtime. We decided to go on holiday the day after anyway as we woyiget our money back and it is only an hour's drive away and a self catering cafe. She was over the worst of it on Sunday and We thought she was ok by Sunday afternoon and ate some food. But was sick again Monday morning. Now her Little brother has caught it and we're leaving tomorrow, going to my parents... maybe we'll go home for a night first instead... allthough my parents have a big house could contain the illness...I'll see what they think.

Oh no! Children always seem to time their illnesses for the worst times! Hope you don't catch it, and the kids are over it soon

We're going for a last trip of the summer at the weekend, to Helsinki. Going to go to an amusement park there which DS is very excited about. Have to take a day off work when I already have nearly a week's worth of minus hours but better than trying to get the train down after work.