6-8 year old parenting club birthday partys, homework and extracurricular decisions

[2in2022twoyearson]

Hi,
Anyone want to join me navigating this age of parenting? Children could be outside this age bracket.

There's lots of baby toddler advice groups and some teen groups but this age I feel a bit in the dark.

I have a soon to be 7 year old girl. She's amazing, loves school, but I often feel like I'm doing or saying the wrong thing to and with her. She's going through a stroppy stage, finds school tiring.

Me and her dad work a lot and we haven't signed her up to many extra curriculum clubs, some of her peers have done loads since reception.

We're planning her birthday party and she has lots of opinions about it, I'm feeling the pressure!

How's everyone doing. Invites for DD party are out, lots of yeses, haven't got final numbers yet but was responded with 2 receprical invites to their partys. There's lots of June birthdays in her year.

Me 🙋🏼‍♀️ I read something the other day about 'the importance of middle childhood often being overlooked' and it got me thinking. Well timed thread.

DS is 6, DD is 4. Feel like we're in a lush sweet spot at the moment but kinda bracing myself for some big changes in the next few years. I keep increasingly hearing stories about 7/8 year olds with hormone changes and social changes and it sounds big.

I didn't know about a big change at 7/8 always thought it would be the nice years, but at nearly my DD does seem hormonal. I thought it would be about 10 years she would get preteen emotional. She lm Had a tantrum last night that was more like when she was 3/4. Ilthen stroppy this morning. I do think she was more emotional age 4 though, so maybe don't worry too much...

Sorry, just seen your ds is 6, same as my DD, but someone earlier in the thread said that girl gets the hormone change around 6 and boys it's 7/8.

Both things can be true. I think a lot of it will be nice. I think we enjoy similar things and will be able to spend time together in a different way which I'm really looking forward to. Even just cooking together and getting stuff done around the house these days feels like a way to connect rather than something to manage (I often had gritted teeth behind the smile when baking with toddlers!!). But equally I think school, friends, emotions etc will change too. So not so much worrying as mentally preparing for it, if that makes sense.

That'll be fun then as DS will be 8 and DD 6 at the same time 😂

I've got a 6yr old, Yr 1 DD. She's definitely does the moods thing bless her! She can also be the sweetest, most affectionate kid. Definitely an interesting age.

I totally agree about all the advice aimed at babies/toddlers/pre-schoolers, then you can get a fair bit on teenagers but not much for these middle years.

Does anyone else's child nail bite or pick scabs at school? Since the summer when my daughter has her knees out she slightly grazed her knees then picks at it, mostly at school. And also found other bits to pick on her knees. This morning I put 5 plasters on her and she came home with a mark on her elbow where she's been sucking it. Since she started school she bites/picks her nails and they get better in the holidays.

I mentioned to her, but kinda wish I didn't about whether any children in her class have fidget toys and if I should ask the teacher if she can? First she pulled a face and said how it was just disruptive children. But when I said if it would help her concentrate and I could ask the teacher she's become keen. However, the teacher hasn't messaged back and I am wandering if the arm sucking was deliberate because she wants to toy, and I don't even know if it's for the best! I never see her teacher because I work except wednesdays when her teacher is out of the classroom for the afternoon.

There are a few autistic children in my family but I've never thought of her as autistic, neither have any teachers suggested it. she's very sociable so well behaved at school and very bright, but maybe too bright, and I some characteristics seem immature. Also a couple of years ago at a performance she was licking the instruments, licking her shoe. Strange thing is she didn't mouth much as a toddler and could do hamma beads without getting silly, was very into jigsaws, had an amazing attention span, from about 16 months. Now I have a toddler boy who is much more what I was expecting from a 2 year old.

Thanks for reading this far.

My oldest still picks her scabs and she's 14! I think most children pick scabs (not DS though, he's far too delicate to do that picks at his nails though)
My son's school does fidget stuff for all the children at this age - they all have rubber bands stretched under their desks to bounce their feet off, woollen strings attached to the front of their desk to fiddle with, and any of them can ask for a weighted dog toy that sits on their lap for them to stroke while they do their work. I really like how they do it, its not something that's just for certain children (e.g. the "disruptive" children as your DD perceives it) so no one stands out if they use them. They can also just take a pair of ear defenders when they feel the class is too noisy, kept in a basket in the classroom for anyone to use. And the special ed teacher evaluates all of them regularly to spot issues quickly.

That's really lovely.
My daughters school is quite behind in sen. They failed on it before she started but as she isn't sen I wasn't too bothered. And they've blamed improvements, but had a few changes in the sen lead. I do think things that Sen children need benefit all children. Her best friend uses ear defenders at times, but he used to get really upset and need to leave the classroom and it's recent.

Made improvements, not blamed improvements

A school that is on the ball with SEN is good for all students, definitely. And a low threshold for support is so helpful. My son goes into 1st grade next year (currently preschool) and we were told that any student can go to the special ed teacher during her open sessions to do their work in a quieter environment instead of in the main classroom. The school really seems to spend their funds on the right things - they will have a spare teacher next year, not assigned to any class but just going where they are needed for extra help and providing cover when needed.

My primary school was ahead of its time on the late 90s with a senco room that anyone could go to at break time, as I think there were sessions throughout the day. I went there for dyslexia help, but it wasn't anything like a normal classroom, eh It had more cushions. Was before there was so much fidget toys and weighted toys but the senco teacher was great. I have fond memories. However, it was as you were saying with a good teacher who supported those at a low threshold. It was exciting too as it had a computer with a Noddy game before computers were widespread. My secondary (senior) school only had help for those who were seriously struggling and behind.

I do think I need a discussion with the teacher. Or see if it continues after the holidays

She came out of school crying today because she wasn't able to make her instrument on forest school, something they'd planned last week and she was very excited about, but was crying about it beforehand because the elastic bands I gave her she wasn't happy with....

Hello,
Doing anything nice over half term?

It's the last week of term here, summer holidays start next week!

Wow, nearly the summer for you. Are you looking forward to it or is it a hassle to get childcare organised? In England we have a week's school holiday then back to school for another term then not on summer holidays until the end of July and it's just 6 weeks which I know is shorter than most other countries. But I feel like my daughter really benefits from these half term week breaks as she finds school so tiring.

Its alright this summer as he is still eligible for childcare in nursery so he goes back to his old nursery for the holidays (which are ten weeks long). Next year he'll have aged out so he'll be home alone/with his big sister when I'm not off work. I'm considering paying DD a bit of money to spend some time/do summer school with him next summer if she doesn't get a summer job.

They only get a half term in October and at the end of February, then its a long slog until summer with just the long weekend off for Easter and a few public holidays. This year Ascension Day falls so late, this Thursday, so it breaks up their last week of school - in mon-wed, off thursday, back in friday (and saturday for DD) but it works out nice for me, I'm taking friday off so I get a nice long weekend and can see his end of year celebration.

We get 2 weeks at easter. DD would not cope with the slog, but maybe that's because she doesn't have the nice sensory equipment, it's less intense. They made the last week very 'fun'/ intense.

It's only 4 hours a day of school this year so its not so bad, but he's in breakfast club and after school club so has very long, but fun days. They've pretty much stopped the learning for the last two weeks, did swimming almost every day last week and this week is playing and a class trip and the celebration.

I do wonder how some children cope with the long term, some of them must get so exhausted. DD was always knackered by mid May but DS seems to take things in his stride more.

That sounds fun. It's just over 6 5 hours of school since she turned 4, she's one of the younger ones, some were nearly 5. A class of 30, can be pretty hectic I imagine. Also, Now it's all proper lessons! English, maths, computing history pe etc. Reception (4-5 years) was mostly playing.

That is so intense at this age. It's preschool here, so like reception its mostly play, and learning is mainly pre reading skills, maths, lots of art and crafts, lots of story time, and a few times a week they mix up with 1st and 2nd graders and work in ability groups and did different themes like media, nature, science and things like that. Next year it all starts proper, with different subjects and timetables.

I agree it's very young and intense. I know they do things like movement breaks and active learning but the classroom is small so they do have to sit at the desk. Her teachers have all been great but they're restricted by the national curriculum. We chose the school because it had a focus on movement ef a morning mile walk round the playground and teachers encouraged to to their classes outside, large grounds. It failed an Ofsted because it was not meeting education standards, especially early reading and SEN so taken over. There were also behaviour issues I didn't know about so the takeover has been a good thing, it's just a shame they have to stay in the classrooms more.

Oh that is a shame, movement is so important and it helps with focus so improves learning which means it should be especially encouraged in schools not meeting standards.

Hi, can I join. My son is 8. We had a terrible morning getting ready for school and I am just sat for a min recovering.
It was just him running late and me getting frustrated and him completely flipping, getting angry and then crying… Now I’m worried how he’s actually going to be at school, whether he’s calm and able to learn.
Gosh, it can be so hard.