My Mum sold a car that isn’t legally hers?

[Lilly1102]

Last year my Mum gave me my late grandmas car (she legally transferred ownership to myself). She inherited it but never drove it as she has her own car and it was just sitting on their driveway doing nothing. I am an only ‘child’ and my grandma really did adore me and would be so pleased I learnt to drive in her car.

i’m 25 so was a late learner. I insured the car, taxed it etc. When I passed my test my partner bought me a more ‘stylish’ car for Xmas. He pays for the tax and insurance on that one so I decided to continue paying for the car I learnt to drive on for a year just to get some no claims and also my younger cousin learnt to drive in it with my uncle so I thought I may as well insure it.

my cousin is now done with the car , my Mum has decided she wants to sell it. I asked her very politely if there was any possibility I could get a very small percentage of the car sale (ie £300) just because I’ve paid £1400 for the car over the year even though I never drove it.

I asked out of principle because legally it is actually in my name etc, it wasn’t about the money, i just asked to see if my parents actually ever considered my opinion or asking me.

my mum has never put any money into that car as my grandma bought it and my mum never drove it even when it was her name (I think she SORNed it).

It took so much courage to ask her as my parents are VERY ‘funny’ with money and I was right to be scared because she phoned me back SCREAMING down the phone telling me she needs the money for the car sale.

she screamed and cried and said ‘I don’t live in the world she’s living in’ (she assumes because I work in finance that I am some rich bitch) which is SO far from the truth.

I’d like to emphasise that my parents live in a 5 bed detached house with a large garden in the Home Counties with NO mortgage. My father is retired and although my mum doesn’t work (she’s also close to retirement age) they are hardly hard done by. Me and my partner on the other hand (although we are also not hard done by) we don’t own a house and we more a less live pay cheque to pay cheque most months.

her reaction really stunned me. It stuns me because they’re so critical of my boyfriend’s father who recently inherited a relatively large sum of ££ from a house sale. My parents think he is selfish for not giving my partner any money for a house deposit from it and they always tell me that if they had spare money they would give it to me.

me and my boyfriends view is that it’s his fathers money - he can spend it on what he likes but my parents have such a double standard because whenever I ask for any help (not on a large scale at all) they quick up a huge fuss.

was I wrong for asking? Like I say, I don’t want the money but I’m more hurt at my mums reaction given her beliefs about other people’s attitudes towards their money! They’re so judgemental about everyone else and as soon as I ask (which I never do because even growing up I was met with reactions like this) it turns out to be a huge drama.

If nothing else, this thread highlights just how confusing car ownership actually is. In which case it's a perfect AIBU thread 😉

I’m sorry but you’re all batshit.

Her Mum GAVE her the car, not lent GAVE, transferred the V5 to her AND let her daughter PAY ALL THE COSTS. What the hell was OP supposed to think???

Now her Mum wants it back because she needs a few bob - wtf?

If you would treat your kids like this you all need to have a word with yourself.

Once more, the DVLA have NOTHING to do with ownership. They neither know or care who the owner is. Filling out the V5C does NOT transfer ownership, it’s not hard to understand.

Whats not to understand is her mum GAVE her the car

Thank you for this. I am surprised to see how many people think I’m so irrational for ever asking!

i guess it boils down to everyone has different principles and values but I am glad there are a few people on here that share the same view :)

My post details information freely available on DVLA website and I’ve followed this process myself after my stepdaughter split with her partner. He bought the car, so was the legal owner, and she was the registered keeper. When they split he wanted to transfer ownership to her and it was a very simple process to fill in the DVLA tick box questionnaire online, which if I remember rightly, asks the person transferring ownership to confirm that they are doing it freely if gifting.

Well yeah, but changing the RK doesn’t prove that. With no paper trail or even text messages etc the only person who can prove ownership is her mum.

Have a look on their website. I’ve actually done it. Below are the details as they appear on YouGov.

Step 2: Let the DVLA know you’re transferring the car’s ownershipWhether you’re selling a car or giving it away to a friend or family member, you’ll have to inform the DVLA that you intend to transfer the car’s ownership.

You have two options here: online or by post.Transferring your car ownership onlineA straightforward and streamlined process, transferring ownership online involves completing the form on the DVLA website. All you’ll need is the details of the new keeper (including their email address), along with the 11-digit reference number from the car’s V5C.

After submitting the form (which is mostly multiple-choice answers), both you and the new keeper will receive an email confirming the transferring of ownership has been completed. A new physical V5C will also be sent to them within five working days. You should also rip up and throw out the old V5C.

Transferring your car ownership by postAlternatively, you can let the DVLA know of a transfer of ownership by post instead. To do this, enter the new owner’s name and address into the boxes on section 2 of the document (the green panel on the bottom left-hand side of page two).

Shall I offer this again?

Maybe so, but it’s not unknown for gov.co.uk to be incorrect and in fact that’s very poorly worded. The only thing the DVLA keep a record of is the registered keeper, which may or may not be the legal owner.

Actually op I think whether your mum was clear it was a gift or loan is a red herring - she is clearly hugely manipulative so I would imagine this happening whatever the initial conversation.
Don't beat yourself up about it you did nothing wrong, Do consider some therapy to unpick their behaviour and how you deal with it and keeping your parent's at arms length. I would avoid any discussion about money including salary, saving etc in future and absolutely NEVER borrow money or accept large or unexpected gifts from them in future.

@MarvelJesus Even the car companies who buy and sell cars only need v5. I've never had a problem at any point with proving I'm the owner with a v5. Yes it says that at the top of the document but it seems a bit irrelevant when current processes show that v5 is ownership. They should remove it

If she said 'the car is yours' and you are the only grandchild then you are not being unreasonable to have assumed you own the car.
If the car was parked at your Mum's all this time and they had keys and your cousin was using it (without needing to ask you), then the 'its yours' gets blurry.

Sounds like 'its yours' is different from 'its yours to use, sell or do whatever with'.

Yes it says that at the top of the document but it seems a bit irrelevant when current processes show that v5 is ownership. They should remove it

But there isn’t a current process which shows that the V5C is ownership and in many cases the RK ISN’T the legal owner. If they just started relying on the V5C as proof then there’d be all sorts of issues! They could change the system to have a title like the US along side (?) registration (not 100% clued up on the US system)

What are your values as a Mother in the scenario?

Car companies who buy and sell also give receipts. That shows the ownership transfer for legal purposes. If you don’t get or give a receipt you can’t prove change of ownership should you need to.

The DVLA appears to disagree.

On the contrary, the direct quote from the DVLA is as follows:

The DVLA does not record those with legal entitlement to a vehicle but records the name and address of
the person keeping the vehicle (‘registered keeper’), in accordance with legislation.

To those saying the V5 is noting to do with ownership - why do you always need to handover the V5 when selling a car? Why does it matter who the registered keeper is? To my mind, the V5 with your proof of address is needed to show you are the owner and the only person allowed to sell.
Not bring argumentative, just genuinely flummoxed by it

I don't think you sound greedy OP but you'll be flamed on here as anyone under the age of 30 is 'entitled' on MN.

I agree with the above.

For some reason there are a lot of people on MN who like to accuse others of being 'grabby', often over issues of inheritance. A lot of the time it seems to me they have no idea what it feels like if parents could provide but choose not to for no good reason.

Yes, 'it's just money' (or in your case, a car) and 'it's hers [your mother's] to do with as she pleases', (though that is debatable here) but then again it isn't really. It's about being made to feel valued, or not. I totally understand why this smarts, OP.

But it sounds like you'd be better off giving up on trying to extract recognition from your parents in matters involving money. You'll just keep getting hurt. I hope you can find a safer vantage point from which to interact with them.

Ignorant police?

v5 is the keeper.

It shows who is responsible for taxing the vehicle, so who will be penalised if it’s not taxed, and who will receive any PCNs. That is the only relationship in which DVLA is interested.

So many PP are hung up on the logbook/V5 or deteremined to kick the OP because "300 pounds is grabby".

OP said in her post that she asked for some of the money to "see if her parents had thought of her" in the decision to sell a car she believed to be hers. There is clearly FAR more going on than sniping over the actual sum. I doubt even the PP who believe it is "grabby" would ring her up to scream and cry down the phone.

Finally, I am in my late 30s with a decent job, but I had to take some time off for health last year and guess what? MY PARENTS HELPED ME OUT.

Most parents do what they can to help their kids out, emotionally and financially. When they are in a position to do so, adult parents help their kids, even when those kids are now adults.

I don't know why OP is getting such a kicking when there are well known threads about manipulative parents like "but we took you to stately homes", and hundreds of other threads about the cost of living. She is a young adult, starting out in her career, clearly with a plan and a partner both trying to build something comfortable in a time when we all know it's tough. She was surprised by her parents' decision and her mum's over-reaction and came here for advice, not a pasting.

*edited for clarity and spelling