hands up if you are a slummy mummy??

[nappyaddict]

fantastic website here to give you tips

come on own up! what things do you do that make people gasp in horror? are you the sort of mum who wipes dummies and bottle tears on your tshirt and gives straight back if they get dropped? i have done it with biscuits too stuff the 3 second rule - it's 10 seconds here!! i always forget to wash my hands after nappy changes too and tbh i only use wipes and water for poohey nappies. with wet ones i just take it off and put the new one on straight away

i am often forgetting to brush ds' teeth. we never brush them at nighttime and he will sometimes go 2 days without having them brushed. must remember to step this up a bit when he gets his adult teeth.

i don't change ds' nappy as often as i should. i did have to dry ds trousers under the handdryer in the toilets though cos i had left one on too long. usually try and change him about every 4 hours but sometimes i just ... forget. he normally only has a bath and hairwash once a week but episodes like this mean he sometimes has an extra one midweek.

also once when we weren't travelling far and it was pitch black i didn't strap the car seat in properly, just put it on the back seat. we had a very awkward car seat that in 2 peoples cars does not strap in properly. i just made sure the front seat is right against it so it can't go anywhere. our car seat was one of those that lies flat when on the pushchair, so in the car is meant to be in the most upright position. at 3 months old this didn't look very comfortable but did it anyway as i couldnt get the car seat in my friends car if i didn't. cue gasps from this woman saying oooh he shouldn't be upright like that. cue her saying oh my dd got her ds one of those door bouncers - you should get him one. now to me they look dangerous!

oh and not really child related but i rarely wear a seatbelt myself. i do in other people's cars though ...

oh and weight limits and warnings on baby products. ds sat in his baby seat for months after he could sit up and was over the weight limit.

the only thing i would be anal about really is drawing on walls and ripping wallpaper which luckily ds hasn't done yet. he is allowed to play with balls in the house, and ride his trike and ride ons in the house too. i also let him push his cars along the wall. have to watch him at other people's houses cos they usually tell their kids off for that. will let him skate in the house too when he's old enough.

not at this stage yet, but my mum used to sometimes let me have the day off school just because and i will probably let ds occasionally have a day off. for me it was usually because i hadn't done some homework that was due in.

when i go out for the day and take milk i just shove it in my handbag - no chilled cool bags for ds! oh and i feed him cold milk and have fed him cold baby food before. i often don't plan meals then he is screaming for dinner so in a mad panic i will open the fridge i give him whatever is edible uncooked. yesterday he had ham, malt loaf with butter and a cherry yohghurt altogether on his highchair. he ate the yoghurt first. today he had banana, meatballs, yoghurt and chocolate brioche.

i thought NA said once she didnt strap lo in.
i don't think she is taking the piss,
sounds reasonable to me

i'm sorry but

• unattended in bath, carseat not fitted properly amongst other things is neglect. other points are just plain irresponsible. it makes me very very very sad for your ds.

I assume so Wats, thng is most of these things is eh ahd posted them seperately and said it was one occasion, we wouldnt bat an eyelid at, it's the bath/car seat thing that ahs got everyone riled and I have left the LO's in the bath unattended whilst I put away washing or got towels etc, I've even been on a thread where everyone was saying they have done it and make their DC's sing or something so they can hear they are alright.
Maybe I'm just hoping too much.

if she ws a 40 year old old hand with 4 dc's would everyone react like this to her?

yes, how is the job? Enjoying it i hope!! Things OK here, almost got my tax credits sorted out - DD being a bugger, but its all good really.

I hope NA gets some help yes, but if her mum is anything like mine was, im sure things will work out.

admittedly onlyh read her 2 long threads, missed the bath one, assuming there was one.
aah well.

Age is irrelevant SlartyBartFest - a 40yo leaving their child alone in the bath/highchair or not using basic car safety would ellicit the same reaction from me.

I couldn't care less about what a lot of what NA says she does (although am also thinking a lot is said for comedy/aren't i cool 'effect' more than anything) but some things simply shouldn't happen. In these cases, it is neglectful. Regardless of how old the parent is.

When I posted my initial reaction, I had no idea "who" nappy was ie. her age, circumstances, no. of kids etc.

In fact, I made the assumption she was one of those "mucky" hippy mothers you see at playgroups whose kids have no boundaries and no discipline and are allowed to "express themselves" all the feckin day long.

I was very wrong in my assumption, but my opinion on whether the described parenting skills are acceptable is unchanged.

Cripes Nappyaddict, I don't get this. Some of those things you are boasting about (yes you are boasting) - particularly about leaving DS unattended in the bath/high chair, make it sound like you want something to happen to him. That's so sad.

I am trying to imagine you with a disabled child. My DS is 7 and has a lot of needs similar to a baby - what would you do (genuine question) if your child was the same; just not bother? You child is going to grow and learn some independence; can't you look out for him while he's little?

Don't you really want him?

I would never have realised these things about you, from posting/conversing with you in the past!

Are you depressed?

Now I'm more than a bit lazy over housework and I am SO not mother earth, but I wouldn't want to be starting threads about my shortcomings.

Don't you want to try to do your best for your DS?

STOP IT janitor, you are preaching to the converted !!

If nappy is here, she aint listening !

la la la la la

I know janitor. You know that, I know that. Those videos are hard to watch

I cannot understand how anyone would boast about putting a precious child at risk.

And Nappy, if you ARE watching, your DS is gorgeous. WTF are you thinking?

what's wrong with having a pillow? it made him sleep better cos he wasn't comfortable. would you like to sleep without a pillow? i put it under his sheet so he couldn't suffocate by it.

i never said i didn't wash wee off him at all - just sometimes. do you wash your bits every time you have a wee? i know i don't. nappy rash occurs when wee and pooh mix. poohey nappies are changed immediately and whole bum area is washed. wee doesn't give nappy rash. surely if you take off a wet nappy, wash them and then put another nappy on that they wee in again, they are going to smell of wee whether you wiped them or not. as someone else pointed out quite a few people only wash them after poohey nappies. when ds was a couple of weeks old the hv said that was fine as they almost constantly have wee next to their skin anyway (unless it was making them sore).

there is a thread at the moment (not started by me) about people who bath their kids once a week. most people seem to think this is fine til puberty unless they have been rolling around in the mud. i just don't think toddlers really get that smelly. it's not like they really sweat.

even my own dentist said brushing toddlers teeth is a bit pointless. all they do is eat the toothpaste. i still do it but what good it does i don't really know.

he wouldn't sleep on his back. he preferred to sleep on his side and then his front once he could roll over. when he was in the hospital the nurses put him on his side so it can't be that terrible. a cot wouldn't fit in my room and he didn't like his moses basket. i think he felt to enclosed by it so he went into his own room.

when i say i leave him in his highchair and the bath i mean i am in the next room. when he is on the counter i am stood next to him not the other end of the house.

he won't drink out of sippy cups but he will drink out of the straw type ones which are the ones i was asking for the other day. as we haven't got any at the moment he is drinking out of bottles and i think that's fine. they are the only non-bottle thing he will drink out of apart from a normal open cup.

i wash my hands after changing poohey nappies cos i normally get pooh on my hands and after changing wet reusables but if he's had a disposable on i don't cos my hands don't really touch any wee. the wees inside the nappy so it isn't wet to touch. also the midwife told me to change him every 4 hours when he was a newborn so that's always what i've done. maybe as he gets older he will wet more and i'll need to change more often but atm his reusables are coping with that fine.

as i said i am trying to improve with the seatbelt thing and i am getting better at it. and the car seat thing with ds - as i said it was once i don't make a habit out of it cos i know i could get into trouble with the police for it and it is safer for him to be strapped in properly. btw i don't drive so my not wearing a seatbelt doesn't endanger others.

as chavtastic, niceglasses and a few other people have said - this was meant to be a lighthearted thread where we all admit we aren't perfect. there have been a few similar ones in the past that stayed perfectly lighthearted except for a few moments when i think it was madamez admitted she'd taken her ds out in a car without a car seat, someone else admitted to breastfeeding whilst drunk, and someone else admitted if its raining they don't go outside to smoke. tbh the only thing on this thread that i think is a no-no is the car seat thing which is why that has only ever happened that one time. i guess i should wash ds' hands before he eats too and i do if he's been playing outside but if he's just been playing in the house i don't really think his hands are that dirty.

oh and i am learning to drive at the moment and bizarrely i always remember to where my seatbelt then. its part of my pulling off routine so i always remember. thinking about it maybe if i start a similar routine for getting into the back seat then i will remember? or maybe if i tell my dad he has to wear his too then i will remember. he won't though. he says it is too uncomfortable. i tend to remember if i'm sitting in the front, but if i'm sitting in the back with ds cos i'm handing him sandwiches to eat or banana or whatever i tend to sit on the edge of the seat so i can pass things to him easier and it really just doesn't occur to me. in a year or two no doubt he will be reminding me to put it on (that's what my cousins do to my dad!!) i think it's cos as a child our car didn't have seat belts and i was always allowed to sit on the tunnel (i think that's the word) in the middle. even now if i'm in the back of my dad's car i will automatically sit right on the edge of the middle seat.

yes nappy but you have given examples of where you have put your son at risk.
even being in another room when hes in the bath/highchair is not good enough - you can't run that quickly in an accident. toddlers can drown in less than 30 secs in a bath, its the most common cause of drowning.

and you often leave him unattended.

I'm sorry but your poor poor ds needs a responsible adult to look after him, and reduce the risk of accidents. he can't assess the risk himself. sadly it appears you are not responsible.

in my work i have seen 2 x 20-30 yr olds die from melanoma (skin cancer caused by too much sun), 2 children die in car accidents, countless adults die in car accidents (and some preventable if they had been wearing a seatbelt) and a 2 year old nearly drown in a bath.

you might think these things won't happen to you/your ds but they do happen, all the time.and you can reduce the risk.

i suggest you read over the posts again, there is some very sensible advice and have a long think.

good luck and take care of that gorgeous ds of yours. he is so precious and so so so vulnerable.

NA I think you should leave it now. Like others I would like to think you are joking, but taking risks with the safety of your child is not funny.
'i put it under his sheet so he couldn't suffocate by it.'
'wee doesn't give nappy rash'
'even my own dentist said brushing toddlers teeth is a bit pointless'
'when i say i leave him in his highchair and the bath i mean i am in the next room'

Mmmm I am do a few of the things you mention as well. eg leave wet nappy on till v. heavy and really needs new as toddler can't walk. i figure it is better for environment. dds never get nappy rash from it though.

like you I am quite a relaxed Mum I don't operate in a 'No risk' environment.

Having said that I wouldn't deliberately not strap a car seat in. but I would carry baby on lap if no car seat (done that loads all over world when no car seats available at all) so do do it on occasion in UK if needs must.

I can see your view on most things. Its about priorities. My kids are very important to me but I do give them a lot of freedom too as I like to see them live. And learn things for themselves.

I think you are more of a 1970s mum than anything else, praps a lazyish one of those..... not judging you , just pigeon holing you!