Teen nursery parents….just being nosey!

[Flowerpowertribe]

Last year I noticed at my DDs nursery in her class (babies) that one of the children’s Mums was a schoolgirl (dropped her off wearing her school uniform, looked 15/16).
This year she no longer wears a school uniform and picks up her child everyday with her boyfriend/the child’s father. I am guessing they are both 17ish based on finishing school last year and that they look very young etc. I am completely judging here (awful I know!) but based on how they dress/act, I would ASSUME they don’t have a lot of money/money for nursery fees. I would also query what they do for work as they are both coming to pick her up at 4pm 3 days a week, often in pyjama like wear.
Yes this is just awful and judgemental and really not very kind behaviour but I’m just curious/nosey as to whether you get free child hours etc if you don’t work…..maybe you get it if you continue education (they could be in college)?
Again, judgey and awful. But I’m more judging the government than the parents.

Yes some 2 year olds get 15 hour funding depending on benefit entitlement, in the area I work we can also apply for that funding to start early when a child hits 18 months. Or the nursery fees might as part of a support package paid by children's social care or maybe they attend college and so are entitled to funding?

Same around here, funded places from very early on but we’re classed as quite a deprived area. A teenager still at school would most likely be given a nursery place to encourage her to finish her education in my area.

@Flowerpowertribe why would you judge the government? It makes sense to support young parents while they're at college.

@Dacadactyl i don't know they’re at college, I’m trying to work out how they’re entitled for nursery place IF they don’t work.

Could they have a parent or grandparent paying?

Teens are supposed to be in a form of education until 18 so I would guess that is why they are putting the child in nursery. Pyjama type wear seems in fashion at the moment, I have some young colleagues who come to work in what looks like pyjamas sometimes so I wouldn’t assume they couldn’t be attending a further education college course just because they’re dressed very casually.

Potentially through the care-to-learn government funding: https://www.gov.uk/care-to-learn

If you look at the eligibility then it’s likely they could get this if only 17 and in education.

@SleeplessSince03 you can be curious and wonder how systems work, systems that taxes pay for. I admitted it was judgey but I went in with honesty- and to learn sometjing new, which I have.
Maybe try and get some sleep….you might perk up a bit!

Why don’t you say hello at pick up time? If they stand out as a different age others may not approach them and instead judge at a distance. You never know you might actually make a friend.

Just read that Care to Learn scheme. That's great. Without education, job choices are severely restricted. This helps everyone.

@Pastachocolate I have said hello, multiple times. Everyone is in a rush so it never goes past that

I hope they are doing further education/HE and all the best to them with it if they are

Are you sure she isn’t a 45yo Mumsnetter? Often mistaken for teens.

As a teen mum I worked unsociable hours starting at 5am and I finished at 2pm which meant I could pick up from the private nursery, and pay for it 🙂

@MiddleParking haha not a wrinkle on them, very jealous

Are you sure she’s not a sister rather than the mother?

@Cheeesus no she’s the Mum.

I wondered, I’ve been given answers, good to know hey!

I’m just curious/nosey as to whether you get free child hours etc if you don’t work

This is googleable, you don't need to ask cunty questions online about it.

As for judging the government, the free hours are solid way of making sure that all children have access to a nursery/pre-school, which is important for their development as well as being a way of 'keeping tabs' on children who aren't doing well, MASH receive a huge amount of referrals from nurseries and early years providers.

@ObliviousCoalmine don't use that word, just not needed for adult conversations

I’m not the miserable arse judging teen parents. Admitting being judgy and nasty doesn’t mean we can’t think you’re a dick.

If you were just genuinely curious and wondering how the system works, you could have asked the question without all the judgement.

One day maybe your daughter will be a teen parent, maybe then you wouldn’t like the judgement.

I wasn’t a teen parent and I hope my kids aren’t, but never cry shame on others about it because you never know what’s around the corner when you have children.

Do you not think it's a good idea that the government support young families? My views stem from this because I had a difficult divorce and was left with 4 children to raise... thanks to the 2 year old funding, I was able to retrain, which in turn led to me being able to provide and give my children a better life. This resulted in us all having better outcomes from hard work.

May I also add that my older children are both graduates and earn good salaries and more than pay back into society. My younger two are well on their way to follow the same trajectory.

Working with vulnerable children it is evident that there is more to be done regarding education and our health care sector.

Well behave like an adult and don't be all judgy then.

I'm glad they're sending their kids to nursery. What would you have them do? Give up bettering their life prospects through work or education and try and bring their child up alone?

Through nursery the family can get some support and it's a sign that the child is well looked after as nursery should have good safeguarding which they are not avoiding.

I'd be cheering them on.

@SleeplessSince03 when did I quote that I was miserable? Or nasty? I did ask questions, hard to phrase it without sounding judgmental or someone like yourself jumping on it so best I stated that I was presuming with bias. We all do it. Whether you want to admit it or not……