5yr old asking HOW Daddy puts the seed in Mummy's Tummy

[CremeDeSudo]

What do I tell her?! DD is 5.5, very bright and switched on and has recently being very interested in pregnancy and having babies. We've told her the generic 'Daddy puts a seed called sperm in Mummy's tummy where there's an egg which join together and grow into a baby' and she knows you go to the hospital and the Dr gets the baby. I don't think she knows where it comes out yet! But recently she's been asking how the seed gets in the tummy and I don't know how to answer! Any tips? We didn't have the proper birds and bees talk with DS until he was 9 and 5 feels awfully young for the details! Help!

😂😂

I told my ds at about age 3 or 4 because he asked the exact same question.

I told him it was very grown up and was he sure he really wanted to hear the answer as it might be too grown up for him? He insisted he wanted to know so I said "The Daddy puts his penis in the Mummy's vagina until the the seed comes out".

He looked utterly horrified and said "You can't put a penis in a vagina!"

Oh you can ds, you can.

I went with the special cuddle while under pressure one morning getting dressed for work (bloody DH in the shower and I'm getting interrogated about sex by a 4yo before I even have pants on). It did satisfy her but well over a year on she's still asking could we not have done the special cuddle two more times so she could have two brothers like her friend. Or twice on the same day so she and her sister were twins

I'd just tell her, without the cringey 'special cuddle' business. My DD was conceived through IUI, so we had to go though the thing about injecting sperm. We figured we had to describe the norm to DD as well, so we explained that the penis squirts sperm directly in there. I don't think children are embarrassed at this age. They just think 'oh, ok, cool'. DD just wanted to know if there is the same kind of syringe in the penis as in the clinic. She was all about the mechanics.

I'm sorry but that is properly hilarious!

Dd asked about the same age. Her brother and sister are 10 and 8 years older than her and she had heard me and dsd having a conversation as she had got a boyfriend.

Dd is also stupidly switched on and wouldn't accept special hugs or I'll tell you when you are older

I think i told her soemthing like, well you know how you have a vagina and a boy has a penis, well a boy and a girl are old enough and they are in love, then then have something called sex and that is when a boys penis goes into a girls vagina. The sperms come out and find the girls egg and then a baby is made.

And then we talked about how she knows mummy doesn't make her hug or kiss people she doesn't want to, well it's the same with sex. Both people have to be ready to try and it's absolutely fine if one isn't ready because it is a big step. But it is also important that both people know that it is ok to say and if you think someone isn't sure then you shouldn't do it because then it is a bit like when Uncle X tries to give you a hug and you don't like it and it makes you upset and sad when he doesn't listen to no.

Sje may have been a bit older but she was definitely no older than 6 because they started basic sex Ed at school in y2.

Omg the that is brilliant!!!!

My godson once asked me what an erection was. He was 3. Apparently his mum was so flustered she told him to ask Aunty Once.

I tried very hard to keep a straight face and said "oh darling aunty once doesn't know...but I bet daddy will"

When one of our’s (5/6) asked this DH just said ‘with my penis’ and then left it. A couple of days later they asked for more detail and we explained. With the ‘only for grown ups’ etc.

They all found out/worked it out in their own way and asked questions - all
of them by 7/8. Better to be factually correct than them have no idea/wrong idea.

We always worked ion the theory that if they are asking then explain as simply as possible and then wait for the follow-up questions.

The biology bit is the least troublesome bit, was more awkward as they got older and were asking more relationship type stuff…when did you…..who with etc!

'With his willy'. Job done.

He doesn't. He fertilises the woman's seed which makes it start growing. Women have seeds, men have sperm that act as fertilisers.

Mummy has half, daddy has half and those halves cone together to make a new whole.

Only adults can do it.

Women aren't passive. Educate a child with a bit more respect to the role of a woman eh!

I’d get her a kids anatomy book that shows diagrams of the insides of men and women. So she can see the ovaries and the womb and the vagina and the testes and the penis but in a age appropriate way designed for teaching kids.

Good point! I was an adult before I understood that sperm don't 'choose' the egg by swimming towards it - it's the egg that swoops up the sperm! Had no idea.

Mine had Mummy Laid an Egg book from around 2 1/2 because I was pregnant with Ds2 so had a growing tummy. There is a youtube video of the book, simple explanation and truthful. There really shouldn't be a sit down birds and bees conversation, it is an ongoing talk that pops up when they ask or if you think you should just drop things into conversations so that they know these things.

This covers relationships and family dynamics like Mums and Dads, Mums married to Mums, Mum and her boyfriend, Dad and step Mum, step siblings etc explaining blended families so it is just a known thing. Children are very accepting of all things. A side issue of this is friendships and how sometimes friends are awful and are they really friends. Anyway, here is the video.

Wow I wasn't expecting quite the amount of responses! OK, I've ordered Mummy Laid an Egg and will just be honest. I always try to answer everything the kids ask me, and my immediate reaction was to tell her, but I told her it was quite a grown up question so I needed to think about how to explain it to her. This was the night before last and she hasn't asked again yet. When she does we will read the book and have a factual discussion! Thanks everyone. I'm glad she asked this at bedtime rather than in Tesco!

We have been honest about sperm in testicles, eggs in ovaries etc. She hasn’t ever asked specifically about how they meet but knows that it happens with a special cuddle.

We will tell her the truth when she asks.

And now her Dh wants her to swallow. Every time

My DD has seen nature documentaries on the telly so I haven’t had to explain it. I just said they’re making a baby. Jurassic Park has also been massively helpful because she knows about combining DNA!

Honestly just tell her. You want her to be able to ask you anything and this is where it starts.

Then she deserves to be told the truth.

I said he puts it in my front bottom. He said 'ewww that's disgusting, is that why you only have 2 babies? ' 😂

Sperm comes out of a man’s body through a penis. It enters a woman’s body through her vagina.

simple, factual.

answer follow up questions if needed, but young children often ruminate on each piece of information for a bit.

for help in general, I recommend the “it’s not the stork series”. They are age leveled books with hand drawn illustrations. You don’t have to sit down and read them cover to cover if your child isn’t ready for that. You can just read the relevant section to the current question.

My son was 4 when he asked me what his testicles were for. I said they contain the seeds that make babies. For months after if anyone spoke too loud when he was getting in the bath/getting changed he'd say "shhh you'll wake the babies" and cover his testicles

Tell her the truth for gods sake

@fixies why do you use front bottom rather than anatomical names?