Funny things your toddler has said

[Mumtobabyhavoc]

I thought it would be fun to share those little gems here.
Mine recently rubbed my pregnant belly and said, "Baby!" Then, without missing a beat touched my boob and exclaimed, "Booby!" 😵‍💫
And: while I was using the toilet came over to me, patted my leg and said, "Good job!" 👏

Got any to share? 😊

@BluJanuary my toddler says everything is 'a bit' something e.g. 'this pasta is a bit nice Mummy!' 😂

@SpringLobelia that's very perceptive for a 5-year old!!!
😂😂😂

@BluJanuary mine does same! Everything is "cute." Must be toddler slang for "cool." 😂

Mine too!! His most common is "it's a bit tasty" when he's eating😄

At the supermarket, in a trolley:

DC: "I want that..."
Me: "want what?"
DC: "thaaaaaaaaaaaat" pointing somewhere
Me: "I don't know what you're pointing at"
DC: "I said thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat"
Me: silence
DC: "I WANT THE PEEEEEEEEENIS- THE CHOCOLATE PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENIS"

Chocolate peanuts.

😂

Cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2

That reminds me. My 2yr 3m old has learnt 'oh my god', I think from his cousin. I'm trying to encourage 'oh my gosh' instead😄

Years ago we were out for lunch.

My ds was about 3 at the time, dropped his fork, proceeded to shout very loudly in a full restaurant, ‘mummy fuck, I have dropped my fuck, mummy my fuuuuccckkkk’.

Everyone was staring!!

He's been doing it since about age 3. He found a tape measure and that started it. But age 5 he's still really mixing up units. However now he understands the difference between time, distance etc.. but he'll still say things that are funny like I think our town is a million miles wide or you're 10km tall.

Aww that's really cute! 🥰
They're so sweet with their logic and world view.

Got any tips for correcting, Are you "f-ing" kidding me?
That gem rolled off dc's tongue last week. 😲
Obvs a conversation I was having on speaker the night before was overheard. 🤦‍♀️

Thought I'd try out a thinking corner/naughty corner yesterday after my 20 month whacked the dog on the head with a roll of cling film.

Put her in the corner, explained everything and she sat really well. Got her out after a minute and she apologised to the dog. She walked back to the corner and sat back down so I was like "oh we only have to sit in the corner to have a think if we have done something naughty"

She stands up, walks over to the dog, punches him, takes me by the hand and says "naughty corner please mummy"

safe to say that discipline tactic is out the window lol

I think my dc has the perfect response... 🤭

Oh no! I must admit my toddler has copied the f-ing word before too (DH got hurt when trying to give the cat a tablet😄). He seems to have forgotten it now thankfully.

My 2yo has learnt 'alright geezer' from her 19 and 13 yo sisters.

I'd say she picked it up earwigging, but no, they taught her... and they think it's hilarious,

Makes it no less awkward at nursery drop off when she barrels up to her teachers and says 'alright geezer!' 😬 bloody teenagers

Could be worse... 🤔☺️

My 3 year old “mummy is that lady going shopping” (lady was carrying a bag)

me “yes probably”

3 year old “she’s got big boobies like mummy”

me “yes” then quickly realising what she had just said! 😂

4 year old mucking around with some toys before bed tonight, after asking him to put them away a couple of times I said 'come on DS, hurry up and put them away now please', which earned me the response '🙄 mummy I'm just a kidddd 🙄'. Made me laugh - got another eye roll for that!

I think we have the same 20 month old. Mine bit her big sister so I put her on the naughty chair with an appropriate explanation - she was delighted, and kept climbing back on after I'd taken her off! (Though at least she didn't bite her sister again to get there.)

The other day I was telling my 3 year old to be careful of the door, otherwise she’ll squish her fingers. She then told me it won’t matter if she loses her fingers as the finger fairy will bring her a new one. She’s convinced the finger fairy works the same as the tooth fairy

Observant and no filter! 😂

My nearly 3yo likes to say ‘Christ on a bike’ - no idea where she’s picked it up from 🫣

She was also still breastfeeding until a couple of months ago and would quite frequently ask other women she knew why they had boobs and if they had milk for her 🙃 thankfully everyone’s seen the funny side of it but I’ve been mortified each time!

For a couple of months now DD (2.2) has been calling horses, including live/plastic/on tv and her hobby horse, 'Yee haw' we had no idea where she got it from as it's not something either of us would say and we asked lots of people and nobody knew.
Then the other day we were at her swimming lesson and the instructor was doing an exercise with them riding in noddles like horses when she sings a song and ends with 'yee haw'! Mystery solved

Not so much funny as brutal. I was greeted after nursery today with a cheerful "Nana!"

(I'm not Nana)