Worrying I am getting too old for baby number 2 - help

[ssummers]

My ds is 5. I desperately want another child - maybe 2!

Because of circumstance (I am very overweight and need to loose some weight) and finances it could be another 1 year before we can start trying for our second child.

This is really effecting me. I am 33 in April and I am worrying that I am getting too old.

I need advice as to whether I am worrying over nothing. All my friends with kids are younger and this makes me feel old! lol

thanks

Goodness - I had mine at 33, 35 and 42.

You are absolutely right though - as an ex midwife, I can tell you that losing weight is much more important than worrying about your age.

I'm 35 and will be 36 when my third pops out - don't worry about it!

had my 2nd 10 weeks ago - i am 39.

Aww - 33/34 is no age at all - you've got tons of time and (fingers crossed for you!) can easily fit another couple in!! Good luck with the weight loss and TTC in future.

Have I been here yet? A title after my own heart. 33/34 is NOT old - I was 34 when I got pg with DS, no probs at all. Am now 36, nearly 37 and ttc #2. OK, I am worried so I know where you're coming from, but I was 2nd youngest in my antenatal group last time! You are not old!

You're a whippersnapper - I had my 1st at 39 and my 2nd at 40. So certainly not over the hill at 33.

If it helps I can add my tuppenceworth to this. I was 31 when I had my first child and 38 when I had my fourth. 33 does not seem old to be having children to me.

ive just had my third at 41!!

bloody hell I had my first at a month under 33 and my second at just turned 37

F&Z can you please do a link that shows that drop at 35, please.
I was 35 last month and tried to express my concerns to dh, but I didn't feel he understood.

yes I will see if I can find it Oblomov
it scared the willies out of me for a bit but like many other posters on here I was able to conceive age 35+, so don't PANIC IMO, just bear it in mind

i know someone who had a baby at 49 - all natural!

here is one Oblomov

I remember the one I saw before being more dramatic - fertility level kind of tootling along nicely until age 35 and then doing this spectacular nose dive - but memory could have been affected by hysteria

My goodness - please stop worrying. I had my first at 35 (nearly 36) and my second at 38!!

Another to whom 33 doesn't seem old at all - and I'm on the youngish side of average - had my 1st at 28, 2nd at 30. I'll be 31 next week and am working on the assumption that I have a good 10 or so years left in which to have nos. 3 and 4

Message withdrawn

Thank you F&Z.

So not too old. I will be 39 when DC3 arrives and a lot of my girlfriends were in their 40's when they had no. 2. I did the career and travel thing first so got married at 31 and had DC1 at 33.

0% at 50? My practice nurse told me that women can get pregnant after the age of 50, and that it is important to use contraception until there have been no periods for 2 years.

She claims that a 55 year old patient of hers got pg and had a child.

I had my 3rd 10 months ago at the grand old age of 41 and I'm overweight. It can be done.

This has been a really helpful and destressing thread for me!! Thank you all for your encouragement and stories.

I really do think that I have stared worrying because of other people! A lot of the friends that I have made at my ds school are earky to mid 20s and they say things like "you dont look 32"! what is wrong with looking 32 anyway! makes me feel so old. And now ds is getting older another one of my friends thinks that I am leaving too big an age gap.
Think that I will stop listening to them to be honest!

thanks again xx

Cam if it was more than 0% at 50, then 1 in every hundred women aged 50 would be capable of getting pg. I think it is very unusual, probably a fraction of a percent

That makes sense Franny, can you tell maths is not one of my strengths

But equally we don't, in fact, know whether one in 100 women aged 50 is capable of getting pregnant, because very few are I would think having unprotected sex on account of how you're told to go on using contraception till you're definitely past menopause, and an absolute fraction would be actively trying to conceive. So if one in 100 is potentially capable of conceiving, it's a matter of chance as to whether that woman is in fact having the kind of sex that would potentially lead to conception, and indeed if she does conceive I think it's more likely that she'd miscarry early, isn't it, and think she was just having a heavy period?