Breastfeeding is making me miserable

[Houndsandbooks]

I have been breastfeeding my daughter for 2 weeks and it is making me miserable. I hate the limiting nature of it. I am unable to go anywhere and only I am responsible for feeding. My partner is fantastic and will give her a bottle of expressed milk at night whilst I try to sleep but all other feeds, burps etc are taking on average over an hour.
as for the promised oxytocin release, I haven’t felt any such thing. If anything my mental state takes a nose dive whenever she is at the breast.
I have spoken to my midwife and she has recommended introducing a formula feed at night but I really want to abandon breastfeeding and solely formula feed. I am also desperate to enjoy this time but the thought of 6 months minimum of this is filling me with dread.
any advice would be greatly appreciated

Well you shouldn't. Powdered formula isn't sterile, and needs to be made with water at 70° then cooled and used immediately.

www.nhs.uk/conditions/baby/breastfeeding-and-bottle-feeding/bottle-feeding/making-up-baby-formula/

I'm not being smug. I'm being proud. My journey wasn't easy.

Op do what you need to do. For yourself and your baba. You need to keep yourself right. If you want to come back to breastfeeding or combi feeding you can but it's up to you

@Emmamoo89 your posts on this thread have been shameful. You’ve made yourself look really stupid and worse, severely lacking in empathy for another mother’s struggles. I’d hope you’re not as ignorant as you’ve come across.

It’s clear you’re very caught up in the breastfeeding obsession that takes some women, I’ve seen you on various other threads talking about your ‘boobies’, but when a new mother is looking for support to stop doing the thing that is hurting her physically and psychologically, that is not the time to go on about how much you’re obsessed with it.

You’ve not even shared anything supportive. Just gone on about yourself.

Just stop OP. I did it for three weeks and absolutely hated it, it took a lovely HV to tell me to stop when I was in floods of tears, and I’m happy I did. I have a lovely 13 month old now, no regrets x

Look at the above comment then.

Please don't do this to yourself, as a mother of a 10yr old formula fed baby (after 3 days, as I couldn't feed properly and she was screaming in what I can only assume was starvation😢) she is absolutely fine. She has been healthier than a lot of her BF school friends. It's so important that you get to enjoy this time. I'm sorry to say this is just one of the classic mum guilt trips, that will unfortunately come your way 😔You make a decision for you and your baby, not for what society or the local mums group think. You got this 💪

If feeds are taking an hour maybe it would be a good idea to see a lactation consultant?
There are many long term health benefits to breastfeeding, having said that if you really don’t feel like you can carry on, then fed is best and a happy mum is the best thing for baby.

I can only only assume you’ve had a word with yourself since this morning then, as it’s taken you a long time to land on that marginal level of support.

You are still talking about yourself, though. This isn’t about you and your ‘journey’. No one cares. It’s about supporting a woman who is struggling with this.

I don't really care what you think tbf.

Tbh*

I imagine no one else on this thread cares what you think, either.

Again not bothered...

Okay Vicky pollard 🙄

The NHS website does also say that although that is the best way, it is also possible to make a feed in advance, keep it in the fridge and use within 24 hours.

Emma also posts on other threads to say breastfeeding any child beyond 2 is weird and creepy so 🤷🏼‍♀️ Think she’s a bit all over the shop to be honest 😂

By how much to how much, overall?

Ah… could we have a bridge dweller in our midst.

Simply make some formula before you go to bed for night time and pop it in the fridge. Then get it out of the fridge and feed. It does take a few minutes longer than getting your breast out, but not much.

The reduction is miniscule.

You know that lots of parents of formula fed babies would say the same, right?

My winter born, formula fed baby is very rarely unwell. Two babies born just before her were both in hospital with bronchiolitis, both babies were EBF. I think what really makes the difference is how much contact babies have with infections. Mine is an only child, the other two babies have older siblings so all sorts comes home from nursery.

Op, I hope you've stopped reading this and have just done what's best for you.

On the topic, breastfeeding obviously has many benefits and it also can be really bloody hard. I dont believe it when people say 'i could never bottle feed, bottles and sterilising is so difficult'. Unsure what is so difficult but honestly it's zero big deal. I have friends who have fed through tongue ties, mastitis, tongue tie correction, etc etc. That looks much harder to me! And clearly worth pushing through it for those mums.

Women should feed their babies however they want to , and be supported in their choices.

@niugboo gosh please never get a job in any kind of research!

so you obviously did not find breastfeeding ‘easier and less hassle in the long run’ with your first child so much so that you introduced formula. You then have another child and find breastfeeding easier and then come on and give an op who has had her first advice that it is easier - completely ignoring that with your second you had experience of having a baby, breastfeeding and supply increases with subsequent children and that it obviously wasn’t easier with your first!

also - still waiting for you to explain how me giving my child a breastfeed differs from you giving your child a breastfeed such that you say my experience doesn’t count and I can’t compare

also waiting to hear how you think my experience would change if I did more breastfeeds?

would also like to know what is ‘long term’ to you for it to become easier and less hassle - I’m sure the op would like to okow this too? Apparently it’s not 3 months of feeding it’s longer? And it’s not 7 months of giving breastfeeds for reasons best known to yourself if it’s not exclusive apparently those feeds and the experience of them doesn’t exist???

@Emmamoo89 didn’t you say you were exclusively breastfeeding your first and only? How on earth would you know anything about combi feeding to say you agree? Or is this another one of your brainless comments on breastfeeding 🙄🙄

Just because you can't imagine something doesn't mean it's impossible for someone else to feel that way. If you don't have useful advice on how to switch to ff how about not responding at all ?

I combo fed for a short while so I don't have exact experience but I would start with bedtime bottle and gradually phase more in. Sorry I dont have much advice about avoiding pain as I didn't have much milk so wasn't an issue for me. Being pre prepared helps with any night feeds

I felt like this, lasted 3 weeks and it was making me feel so down I gave up. As soon as my partner went out to by bottles and formula I felt relief. If you want to stop then stop, don't put pressure on yourself x

@AnotherAnother1 oh dear.

I didn’t know it would be less hassle in the long run because I was already combi feeding. Obviously. I found out breast feeding was easier in the long run with child 2 because I did it. A comparison. Doing something first doesn’t make it easier. It just makes it first.

I clearly said breastfeeding is easier in the long run. You didn’t breast for a long time, you breastfed for months. If I believe you. Breast feeding for a short period means you aren’t experienced in long term breast feeding and therefore cannot compare the too. You can offer your experience of two things. Short term feeding and combi feeding. That’s it.