@FTEngineerM
I’m really surprised to be reading teens.
Emotionally it’s got to be tough, but surely you’ve slept a bit.. you have some bodily autonomy.. you can leave the house without them even for just 2 minutes.. you haven’t got to wipe their arses multiple times a day..
In some respects it’s got to be easier?!
Yes, it's much easier physically, practically and logistically. You have more physical freedom. And you are not sleep deprived; well only when you have to pick them up from a party after midnight, or they have friends over who keep you awake, or they decide that 1am is the best time to offload something they have been worrying about for a month, or you are awake worrying that they will get back from a party safely, or it's their first time away overnight, while driving a car. But generally you are relatively well rested.
But teens can be incredibly emotionally draining and whereas small children have, generally speaking, small problems that are fairly easily solved, teens can have very large and potentially serious problems that sometimes you can't solve, and you just have to stand back and let them make a mistake, or suffer, or in a few cases, potentially endanger their own lives. And the phrase about you only being happy as your unhappiest child definitely holds true.
Hormones can completely change their personalities and they can go from being fairly cheerful, helpful, engaged, energetic DC one minute, to withdrawn, selfish, irrational, impulsive teens the next. The process of splitting off from you to become an individual in their own right can be very difficult for some and is not linear. They switch between rebelling and being desperate for freedom, to suddenly needing to retreat back to the comfort of home. And that can be confusing, for them and for you. If they can't handle something then they can "hand over" or re-direct their angst on to you, so you become a sort of emotional shock absorber. Oh yes and they don't look at you uncritically any more but start questioning your authority, your opinions, your choices and they can identify your faults and failings as a parent and as a human and they challenge you on them!
Don't get me wrong, it's bloody brilliant to see them blossom and grow in independence and find their way. And you still love the very bones of them. But as a parent, it can be a bit hellish along the way. And hellish for them too of course.