Feeling annoyed about school and need to rant!

[november90]

I'm sure most will read this and think I'm being unreasonable... maybe I am but I just need to vent!
My son is 4 and just started reception. Like most his age, suffered a lot due to the lockdowns etc and is having some difficulty adjusting to school. He is finding his uniform very difficult to wear as he doesn't feel comfy. It's mainly the pants. I put his issues with certain textures on his nursery transition form, i mentioned it on the pre school meeting, the home visit and also the phonics meeting 2 weeks ago. I just want assurance he's ok to wear his shorts which they have always told me he is. Anyway, dropped him off today and the teacher was really abrupt with me about wearing his pe shorts and not joggers... they way them to go into school wearing both at the same time. I felt so embarrassed and also annoyed.... why tell me one minute he's ok tk wear shorts but the next she wants the joggers and shorts?!
Also, the reading book annoys me. I made ds feel so proud about himself last week for doing a reading session everyday and he watched me fill the book out and when it got send home after being reviewed not so much a sticker or well done comment! Completely blank!
I've spoke to my family about this who say I'm expecting too much from school... but I just feel sad that we're like 6 weeks into school and o feel so distant from it all!
Anyone else have a new school child and feel the same? I know teachers are stressed and restricted due to Covid, but as a parent I'm finding it hard!

But a reading diary isn’t evidence they’re being read to, or not being read to.

It gives a pretty good idea.

@Hercisback

Kids that don't get read to at home, get more chance in school.

Encouragement to read leads to loads more progress through the whole education system. The more you can encourage reading, the better.

I'm not sure what else a teacher needs to do...

I’m not arguing they don’t, reading is very important.

I’m saying that filling out a reading diary on behalf of your kid is a waste of time. I’d also say that if it doesn’t have any measurable benefit in the classroom (which we can surely agree it doesn’t because all you can tell me you do with it is identify the kids who’s parents don’t fill in the book) then it’s pointless.

I’m saying that filling out a reading diary on behalf of your kid is a waste of time

Arguing on MN is a bigger waste of my time .
As someone who reads with children at school regularly, reading diaries are helpful to me, and I’m glad parents fill them out.
If you think they’re a waste of your time, don’t fill it out. It’s really simple.

@TheGrumpyGoat

They absolutely do! But a reading diary isn’t evidence they’re being read to, or not being read to

In my experience, it is. The children who don’t have their reading diaries filled out usually tell me that they haven’t read with a parent at home. The ones who have it filled out usually tell me that they read regularly with a parent at home.

Ok, so let’s say for sake of argument that it’s a foolproof system - nobody is either too busy or too forgetful to fill it in, despite reading with their kid every night.

What do you do with that now? You know 50% of your kids are definitely read to. You know 50% are definitely not. What do you do with that information?

@TheGrumpyGoat

I’m saying that filling out a reading diary on behalf of your kid is a waste of time

Arguing on MN is a bigger waste of my time .
As someone who reads with children at school regularly, reading diaries are helpful to me, and I’m glad parents fill them out.
If you think they’re a waste of your time, don’t fill it out. It’s really simple.

We don’t have them.

I’d also say that if it doesn’t have any measurable benefit in the classroom

I'd say the encouragement and reminder to read has a huge benefit in the classroom. If a parent who normally reads once or twice now reads 3-4 times a week because of the diary then that's a huge win.

I'm not a primary specialist, however it would be interesting to hear from primary teachers about the impact of the diary.

We don’t have them

Then there’s no issue, is there?
As someone who gives up my spare time to read with other peoples children, they are useful to me. I’m glad they give up a small amount of their spare time to fill them out.

@Hercisback

I’d also say that if it doesn’t have any measurable benefit in the classroom

I'd say the encouragement and reminder to read has a huge benefit in the classroom. If a parent who normally reads once or twice now reads 3-4 times a week because of the diary then that's a huge win.

I'm not a primary specialist, however it would be interesting to hear from primary teachers about the impact of the diary.

I’m a primary specialist. It’s why I told that other poster to look me up.

The 50% that aren't read to are prioritised and any time with TA, or other adults, is used to hear them read.

Primary specialist in a deprived area?

@Hulkynothunky

*if the teacher is commenting once the child has been read to, why do the reading diary?

Feedback could be ‘needs to work on -ou sounds*

How many bloody times do you need to be told this?! The reading log is designed to encourage parents to read to their children. Sadly some parents won't read to their children, this is designed to help - if you log it you are more likely to do it. There is no need to feedback.

You cannot possibly say the child needs to work on a sound based on reading you as the teacher did not hear. It would make sense for the parent (the person hearing the reading) to write they need to work on the ou sound.

As I said a 4 year old just started reception child will in most cases be a non reader. So at this stage the parent is doing the reading. So what feedback can a teacher actually give anyway? I personally don't need a well done from another adult that I read to my own child. Perhaps you do.

OP this isn't directed at you - this poster is an absolute tool. OP I do think you are expecting a bit much, but it's understandable as nursery give more detailed feedback.

Why? The parent isn’t a trained professional, how do they know the ins and outs of phonics?

The insults are really unnecessary, nobody is making you reply to me.

Feedback could be ‘needs to work on -ou sounds’.

Who would be giving the feedback? The teacher or the parent?

The parent will be able to hear what sounds the child is struggling with and can put a note in the reading journal if they want to but they learn sounds every day in school and so the teacher will be able to hear what sounds they’re struggling with regardless of the comment.

The teacher could put a comment like needs to work on -ou sounds and if it’s an issue they will write a comment in but again they work on these in class and the reading is literally just practising the sounds they have learnt in school.

Reading shouldn’t have to be stressful its not an exam, it should be fun and like anything it’s all about getting practice in. You don’t want to spend the entire time getting your child to do -ou sounds you just want them to practise and enjoy reading and you can help them with any words they find tricky.

@Hercisback

Primary specialist in a deprived area?

Yes.

@Hercisback

Primary specialist in a deprived area?

Hmm, I should really say, yes and no.

@toocold54

Feedback could be ‘needs to work on -ou sounds’.

Who would be giving the feedback? The teacher or the parent?

The parent will be able to hear what sounds the child is struggling with and can put a note in the reading journal if they want to but they learn sounds every day in school and so the teacher will be able to hear what sounds they’re struggling with regardless of the comment.

The teacher could put a comment like needs to work on -ou sounds and if it’s an issue they will write a comment in but again they work on these in class and the reading is literally just practising the sounds they have learnt in school.

Reading shouldn’t have to be stressful its not an exam, it should be fun and like anything it’s all about getting practice in. You don’t want to spend the entire time getting your child to do -ou sounds you just want them to practise and enjoy reading and you can help them with any words they find tricky.

The parent isn’t a trained professional though, why would they be giving tips to the teacher?

It’s funny you think filling in a diary makes reading more fun.

Oh god - but why? What do you do with that information?

Judge you as feckless and uncaring. Not much tangible, that’s for sure.

I never filled in a single one despite reading to and being read to every day. Nobody ever asked me about it as it was patently obvious that my daughter was doing fine with reading.

Children who are regularly read to at home show greater progress in their reading. Encouraging that can only be a good thing.

People use this as some kind of pious exclamation that proves everyone must do this as it is some kind of magical effect. Children who do more at home of anything than they do at school will show greater progress at it at school. There was one kid in my daughter’s class who’s mum was a maths whizz and she used to have her kids doing loads of maths games, made them practice for their “big maths” tests every night. As a result her kids were always winning all the maths prizes. But you don’t hear people exclaiming we should all be doing multiplication with our kids every night from the moment they are born. Both maths and reading are equivalent skills and given how many people you hear saying “I’m just so bad at maths, was never taught it well at school” arguably we should be focussing on that rather than trawling through Biff, kip and chipper and the fucking magic key every night with kids who find them dull and monotonous.

I would absolutely ask the teacher about this. In fact, experience has taught me that anything you are angering or worried about, raise it with the teacher. 99% of the time they will set your mind at rest instantly. Once something is niggling, it doesn’t tend to go away, so best just to raise it and get your mind set at rest.

Yes I'm in England.

I'm not actually a big fan of reading diaries but parents need to be aware of the reality in schools. In KS1 there in no staff to sit hearing individual readers all day and writing in reading diaries.

Why? The parent isn’t a trained professional, how do they know the ins and outs of phonics?..

The person who actually heard the reading is the only person who can comment.

There is something wrong with society if we think teachers are the only ones who can give feedback to children to improve their understanding.

I do not believe you are a teacher for one minute. You have zero idea how much time teachers have and how important parental engagement is.

It's a way to encourage parents to read to their kids. How can that be bad?

One of the biggest issues in deprived areas is literacy and parental engagement. If you work in a lovely MC utopia where everyone reads to Tarquin daily anyway, then it would be hard to imagine how many 'floaty' parents there are who will do something if asked/if there is a 'reminder' but wouldn't if that reminder/diary wasn't there.

@toocold54

What do you do with that information?

Why do you keep asking the same question when lots of posters have answered you?

If you can’t grasp what they’re saying then drop it and stop making yourself look like an idiot who doesn’t know how to read when you obviously can.

Again with the insults, it’s so unnecessary. Can you stop?

Here’s what you do with the information: identity the parents who don’t fill in the diary. That’s the only conclusion you can come to here.

People use this as some kind of pious exclamation that proves everyone must do this as it is some kind of magical effect. Children who do more at home of anything than they do at school will show greater progress at it at school. There was one kid in my daughter’s class who’s mum was a maths whizz and she used to have her kids doing loads of maths games, made them practice for their “big maths” tests every night. As a result her kids were always winning all the maths prizes. But you don’t hear people exclaiming we should all be doing multiplication with our kids every night from the moment they are born. Both maths and reading are equivalent skills and given how many people you hear saying “I’m just so bad at maths, was never taught it well at school” arguably we should be focussing on that rather than trawling through Biff, kip and chipper and the fucking magic key every night with kids who find them dull and monotonous

Ha. Pious exclamation.
I’m just some lowly ignorant parent who gives up my free time to read with kids at school, many of whom don’t get read with at home. Don’t mind me.

No I get both points OP

The TA always rights her comments in the reading book