Feeling annoyed about school and need to rant!

[november90]

I'm sure most will read this and think I'm being unreasonable... maybe I am but I just need to vent!
My son is 4 and just started reception. Like most his age, suffered a lot due to the lockdowns etc and is having some difficulty adjusting to school. He is finding his uniform very difficult to wear as he doesn't feel comfy. It's mainly the pants. I put his issues with certain textures on his nursery transition form, i mentioned it on the pre school meeting, the home visit and also the phonics meeting 2 weeks ago. I just want assurance he's ok to wear his shorts which they have always told me he is. Anyway, dropped him off today and the teacher was really abrupt with me about wearing his pe shorts and not joggers... they way them to go into school wearing both at the same time. I felt so embarrassed and also annoyed.... why tell me one minute he's ok tk wear shorts but the next she wants the joggers and shorts?!
Also, the reading book annoys me. I made ds feel so proud about himself last week for doing a reading session everyday and he watched me fill the book out and when it got send home after being reviewed not so much a sticker or well done comment! Completely blank!
I've spoke to my family about this who say I'm expecting too much from school... but I just feel sad that we're like 6 weeks into school and o feel so distant from it all!
Anyone else have a new school child and feel the same? I know teachers are stressed and restricted due to Covid, but as a parent I'm finding it hard!

@Pumperthepumper is this how you speak to your pupils/their parents?

I was always expected to comment in all reading diaries at least once a week. Taught mostly 8/9 year olds but seems like many moons ago and timetable was more flexible. It was unusual to have a TA. Usually had 5 to 10 children on low, medium level IEPs (individual education plans) which were needed as evidence to get a statement. Rare. Which took months/years and was the only way to get 1:1 support for a child. Often listening to the child read daily by the teacher was on the IEP and again had to be evidenced. A priority anyway regardless of signing a reading record.
The school essentially had to evidence that they had done everything possible to help the child before a statement would even be looked at, through the IEP levels. This was about 15 years ago not sure how much it has changed.
Needed stamina from both the school and parents to get anywhere.
Some of the weak readers, children on IEPs never read at home. Would put a reading book into their bags to take home, with reading record book, never to be seen again. So eventually would keep book and record in school.
Would flit from 1:1 to listen in on more independent pupils with group/paired reading and sometimes quickly sign records.
Worked in one school, more recently, which had a star rating🙄 for home reading.
Good that parents care enough to complain about reading records but time is taken up by those who don't.

Personally I don't think they should be making an issue over the shorts/joggers.

I agree especially at the beginning when they’re just settling in.
Unless the school is extremely strict which I’d be surprised at for a primary then I think there has been some misunderstanding.

@Pumperthepumper what on a book that literally has 'LOOK' on every single page? As we are talking about reception class here.

And what is the point in letting them start on random pages that they have most likely already read or not read to? Are you actually a teacher? What stage? That would really piss me off if I knew you was doing that. As an avid reader - which I hope I have passed on to my kids - part of reading is enjoying the journey through the book, to follow the story and explore what's happening in it. It shouldn't be a box ticking exercise. Your level of engagement sounds shite

[quote Evesgarden]@Pumperthepumper what on a book that literally has 'LOOK' on every single page? As we are talking about reception class here.

And what is the point in letting them start on random pages that they have most likely already read or not read to? Are you actually a teacher? What stage? That would really piss me off if I knew you was doing that. As an avid reader - which I hope I have passed on to my kids - part of reading is enjoying the journey through the book, to follow the story and explore what's happening in it. It shouldn't be a box ticking exercise. Your level of engagement sounds shite[/quote]
That’s rude.

If it says ‘look’ on every page, why does it matter where they start?

[quote Evesgarden]@Pumperthepumper what on a book that literally has 'LOOK' on every single page? As we are talking about reception class here.

And what is the point in letting them start on random pages that they have most likely already read or not read to? Are you actually a teacher? What stage? That would really piss me off if I knew you was doing that. As an avid reader - which I hope I have passed on to my kids - part of reading is enjoying the journey through the book, to follow the story and explore what's happening in it. It shouldn't be a box ticking exercise. Your level of engagement sounds shite[/quote]
And surely it’s much more likely to be a box ticking exercise if you make them read it from the page their parent tells you they stopped at, rather than one they find themselves using their own comprehension?

Especially as it's flippin' Reception and the child can't read the comment anyway. OP wants a Gold Star For Mummy, really.

I got this impression too. I think it sounded more like OP wanted her own efforts to be acknowledged, not so much her DCs. Whether or not it’s acknowledged by the teacher, the benefit of reading at home is still there. Why does it matter??
This makes as much sense to me as going to a monthly baby weighing with your health visitor and expecting a golden star for feeding your child if they’ve gained weight. And then wondering what’s the point in feeding them in the first place if no one praises you for your efforts.

@november90 teacher shouldn't have snapped about joggers and shorts but maybe she had a tough day too. Maybe she had 10 kids complain they were too cold in shorts. Maybe she just forgot you mentioned he won't wear the joggers. Maybe it came across harsher to you than she intended. Try as we might we are human too and sometimes have difficult days!

But I bet if you email/ write a note/ private message on the school app she will be willing to engage with you and see if you can come to a solution. Maybe that's leaving a pair of joggers in school incase he gets cold or something similar.

Mostly though do you have an asda near you? They have started sensory school uniform range with softer materials, elasticated waist bands, less/softer seams, no labels. Maybe it is will help.

And surely it’s much more likely to be a box ticking exercise if you make them read it from the page their parent tells you they stopped at, rather than one they find themselves using their own comprehension?

I dont think you have any comprehension of what reading a book is tbh. The journey starts at the beginning of the book and finishes at the end - when the book is completed. Even nursery books are not just random picture books, they tell a story visually that you can discuss with the child when there are minimal words. The progression through the book instils a sense of achievement.

You say ' does it matter" - yes it does. You sound like you couldn't give a shit tbh. If you are honestly a teacher and think its fine to just allow the child to pick a random page to read from and that's enough for you then you really need to go back and find a love for reading and teaching again.

@Rosesareyellow

Especially as it's flippin' Reception and the child can't read the comment anyway. OP wants a Gold Star For Mummy, really.

I got this impression too. I think it sounded more like OP wanted her own efforts to be acknowledged, not so much her DCs. Whether or not it’s acknowledged by the teacher, the benefit of reading at home is still there. Why does it matter??
This makes as much sense to me as going to a monthly baby weighing with your health visitor and expecting a golden star for feeding your child if they’ve gained weight. And then wondering what’s the point in feeding them in the first place if no one praises you for your efforts.

Lots of parents discuss what the teacher has written to/about the child with the child in question when they get the book out.

Myself included.

Our reception teacher writes it to my dd and I show her what's been said. I also show her what I have written back. Its part of the process.

Its sad that so many people expect so little.

@Evesgarden

And surely it’s much more likely to be a box ticking exercise if you make them read it from the page their parent tells you they stopped at, rather than one they find themselves using their own comprehension?

I dont think you have any comprehension of what reading a book is tbh. The journey starts at the beginning of the book and finishes at the end - when the book is completed. Even nursery books are not just random picture books, they tell a story visually that you can discuss with the child when there are minimal words. The progression through the book instils a sense of achievement.

You say ' does it matter" - yes it does. You sound like you couldn't give a shit tbh. If you are honestly a teacher and think its fine to just allow the child to pick a random page to read from and that's enough for you then you really need to go back and find a love for reading and teaching again.

Ok, let’s do it your way. They can’t tell me where they left off, but their parent said it was page 6. We start from page six. How do I assess their comprehension?

@Rosesareyellow

Especially as it's flippin' Reception and the child can't read the comment anyway. OP wants a Gold Star For Mummy, really.

I got this impression too. I think it sounded more like OP wanted her own efforts to be acknowledged, not so much her DCs. Whether or not it’s acknowledged by the teacher, the benefit of reading at home is still there. Why does it matter??
This makes as much sense to me as going to a monthly baby weighing with your health visitor and expecting a golden star for feeding your child if they’ve gained weight. And then wondering what’s the point in feeding them in the first place if no one praises you for your efforts.

Goodness me are you actually being serious? How petty of you both. Maybe I'm a parent of a child who has just started school who is excited to share these things with him and help make him feel really special and proud of himself. He came home with a gold sticker on one day and he was over the moon. I was looking forward to seeing his excitement with his reading so shocked to see there was nothing in the book. If this is the process then fine, but I'm not at fault for not knowing this. Like I've already said, first child in school, I have no idea how these reading books work, I was never told it was just a parent journal. I will also not be made to feel like a bad person for feeling sad or disappointed for lack of communication (regarding sons pe kit and the journal process) from school. My post was really me asking if any other reception parents felt the same as me or could give me some suggestions about the pants, not for a bunch of rude people telling me to get a grip, I'm pathetic, I want a gold star, my concerns are "none issues", I'm wrong for thinking my son (who you know nothing about) missed out on things due to lockdown. Shame on you all! The only patheticness and examples of people who need to "get a grip" ETC are from those who so carelessly and rudely commented.

But on that note thank you to the people who have messaged me and commented with tips and advice and also shown some empathy to the situation. You made me feel better and given me abit of confidence in what I should do next. I appreciate jt, thank you :)

You are totally obsessed with feedback and assessment. It doesn't need to be 24/7. Feedback can also be verbal - there is no need to evidence everything. Even Ofsted would acknowledge that.

This is my last post on this thread now as it's wasting my time and it's totally derailed the OP.

I really do think you are not a teacher. I comes across like you've picked up some buzz words and are running with it to make your point. Your point being the log is pointless - but that's just your opinion. Many parents and teachers find it helpful as this thread demonstrates. If you really are a teacher I find it concerning that you have a complete inability to see someone else's point of view.

@Hulkynothunky

You are totally obsessed with feedback and assessment. It doesn't need to be 24/7. Feedback can also be verbal - there is no need to evidence everything. Even Ofsted would acknowledge that.

This is my last post on this thread now as it's wasting my time and it's totally derailed the OP.

I really do think you are not a teacher. I comes across like you've picked up some buzz words and are running with it to make your point. Your point being the log is pointless - but that's just your opinion. Many parents and teachers find it helpful as this thread demonstrates. If you really are a teacher I find it concerning that you have a complete inability to see someone else's point of view.

You don’t have to believe I’m a teacher, it makes no difference to me. And you’ve said it enough times now.

Assessment (formative or summative) is important. I don’t see how you could assess their comprehension without some kind of ‘assessment’ either verbal or otherwise. Lesson plans involve some form of assessment, always, it’s how you gauge the success of a lesson.

And very ironic that you’re lecturing me on not seeing other points of view. Probably best you’re heading off now, you seem to be taking my opinion of reading diaries very, very personally.

It's new to you. Of course you're not going to know how things usually pan out.

I've 5 children. On my first I thought everyone should update me on every minute of their day. I was disappointed when the same kids got star of week or some shite like that. I use to will the teachers to come and tell me about my child's day and how great they got on. But it doesn't happen. You'll hear alright if there's a problem or they've misbehaved. By child number 5, I was actually hiding from teachers willing them not to speak to me or phone me. If I got through a day where there was no phone calls or notes home or teacher pulling me aside, I was very happy.

Alot of schools worldwide are trying to get rid of gold stars, child of the week, child of the century, best child for attending school, best child for never being sick.... Basically everyone's a winner 😂 best thing to do is print up a reward chart for at home. I did this because of my gang and they were lazy feckers who hated doing anything. I just googled reward charts and there's lots of templates online, stick in their name, job to be done, you can add in the reading, homework etc then a prize at the end of the week, something small and cheap. A kid gets very excited over a pack of bubbles.

With regards to the trousers, your son has sensory issues? My disabled dd has too. It takes time to find clothing that they like. I spent about 2 years feeling seams on clothing 🙄 dd can't bear seams. Tags, stitching, hard material, anything around neck, anything on head, socks, shoes, you name it. When we find something that she likes we buy it in every size and stock up. I remember buying seamless socks from M&S, the special needs clothing shops were so expensive, I think we bought about 50 pairs, I think they thought I was selling them. It does take an age to find clothes suitable, it's trial and error. I've sent back more clothes than I kept but when you find something that's right, buy a ton of it.

You are going to have lots of conversations over the years where the other party, forgets, denies having, that's why I email everything. No one can deny when it's in writing.

Hi all

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@Pumperthepumper Ok, let’s do it your way. They can’t tell me where they left off, but their parent said it was page 6. We start from page six. How do I assess their comprehension?

That wasn't what you said before.

And this isn't about you,

This is about a parent expecting some kind of engagement on her Childs reading book.

So it looks like in your class class no fucker is writing in the reading diarys

And surely it’s much more likely to be a box ticking exercise if you make them read it from the page their parent tells you they stopped at, rather than one they find themselves using their own comprehension

Asking a child to do this every time adds a lot of unnecessary time to an already time pressured activity. It’s also asking a lot of a reception child - adults also use book marks you know, or do you try and find a page by flicking through a book and ‘remembering’ what you had last read every time

[quote Evesgarden]**@Pumperthepumper* Ok, let’s do it your way. They can’t tell me where they left off, but their parent said it was page 6. We start from page six. How do I assess their comprehension?*

That wasn't what you said before.

And this isn't about you,

This is about a parent expecting some kind of engagement on her Childs reading book.

So it looks like in your class class no fucker is writing in the reading diarys[/quote]
We don’t have reading diaries.

I’m asking you, since you think I’m ‘shite’ what I should do instead in that scenario you think makes them a better reader.

@Rosesareyellow

And surely it’s much more likely to be a box ticking exercise if you make them read it from the page their parent tells you they stopped at, rather than one they find themselves using their own comprehension

Asking a child to do this every time adds a lot of unnecessary time to an already time pressured activity. It’s also asking a lot of a reception child - adults also use book marks you know, or do you try and find a page by flicking through a book and ‘remembering’ what you had last read every time

It really isn’t asking a lot of a child to remember where they left off. If they have good reading comprehension they’ll be able to do it no problem. And if they don’t, me making them start at page six because that’s what their parent said changes absolutely nothing.

Give up everyone. Pumper isn't going to back down. Have a little search of their username...seems to be they enjoy arguing the toss on anything. Complete loss of focus now on the OP and just a desire 'to be right.'

@Hulkynothunky

Give up everyone. Pumper isn't going to back down. Have a little search of their username...seems to be they enjoy arguing the toss on anything. Complete loss of focus now on the OP and just a desire 'to be right.'

Right about what? It’s my opinion - and I’m not the one slinging insults around. Your posts towards me are pretty odd, might be time to leave me be.