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Parenting

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Original poster

Feeling annoyed about school and need to rant!

363 replies

november90 · 06/10/2021 18:54

I'm sure most will read this and think I'm being unreasonable... maybe I am but I just need to vent!
My son is 4 and just started reception. Like most his age, suffered a lot due to the lockdowns etc and is having some difficulty adjusting to school. He is finding his uniform very difficult to wear as he doesn't feel comfy. It's mainly the pants. I put his issues with certain textures on his nursery transition form, i mentioned it on the pre school meeting, the home visit and also the phonics meeting 2 weeks ago. I just want assurance he's ok to wear his shorts which they have always told me he is. Anyway, dropped him off today and the teacher was really abrupt with me about wearing his pe shorts and not joggers... they way them to go into school wearing both at the same time. I felt so embarrassed and also annoyed.... why tell me one minute he's ok tk wear shorts but the next she wants the joggers and shorts?!
Also, the reading book annoys me. I made ds feel so proud about himself last week for doing a reading session everyday and he watched me fill the book out and when it got send home after being reviewed not so much a sticker or well done comment! Completely blank!
I've spoke to my family about this who say I'm expecting too much from school... but I just feel sad that we're like 6 weeks into school and o feel so distant from it all!
Anyone else have a new school child and feel the same? I know teachers are stressed and restricted due to Covid, but as a parent I'm finding it hard!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

TheGrumpyGoat · 06/10/2021 21:26

@alrightfella

In reception, a class of 18 with a teacher and two TAs so a ratio of 1:6

I was just saying schools can be like that.... But unfortunately you have to pay for the privilege.

Yeah they can be like that, but not really relevant to the OP’s situation. Unless she can find £20k a year down the side of the sofa.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:28

I agree with you about the reading book. What’s the point of setting it as homework if they’re not going to look at it?

The shorts thing sounds like rubbish communication, which is very common in schools. I’d get back in touch as say, he’s wearing shorts.

toocold54 · 06/10/2021 21:35

I agree with you about the reading book. What’s the point of setting it as homework if they’re not going to look at it?

They do look at it.
They just don’t write a reply as it’s not a piece of work that needs to be marked like the work they do in school.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

4 year olds Families General education General parenting

Hercisback · 06/10/2021 21:37

Not all work done in school needs to be marked either. I trust the teacher to have seen it at some point. A red tick proves nothing.

Birdkin · 06/10/2021 21:37

@Pumperthepumper

I agree with you about the reading book. What’s the point of setting it as homework if they’re not going to look at it?

The shorts thing sounds like rubbish communication, which is very common in schools. I’d get back in touch as say, he’s wearing shorts.

The point is that is massively beneficial for your child to read every day…

Anyway no comment doesn’t mean no one’s looked at it, teachers always want to know who reads at home and who doesn’t to help target support.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:37

@toocold54

I agree with you about the reading book. What’s the point of setting it as homework if they’re not going to look at it?

They do look at it.
They just don’t write a reply as it’s not a piece of work that needs to be marked like the work they do in school.

Why not?

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:38

@Birdkin how does sending unmarked homework help them read every day?

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:39

@Hercisback

Not all work done in school needs to be marked either. I trust the teacher to have seen it at some point. A red tick proves nothing.

No, but a ‘needs to concentrate on phonics’ or ‘excellent reading! Next step is….’ makes it a useful exercise?

TheGrumpyGoat · 06/10/2021 21:40

@Pumperthepumper the benefit to the child is that they’re read with every day. A lack of a red tick in the book doesn’t take away this benefit from the child.
Writing a reply in everyone’s reading diary every day would take away from valuable teaching time.

Hercisback · 06/10/2021 21:40

Why would a teacher mark a reading record? That's nuts.

IlsaLund · 06/10/2021 21:40

@Pumperthepumper because 30 children - 30 comments is 30-30 minutes of wasted time in a jam packed schedule.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:40

[quote TheGrumpyGoat]@Pumperthepumper the benefit to the child is that they’re read with every day. A lack of a red tick in the book doesn’t take away this benefit from the child.
Writing a reply in everyone’s reading diary every day would take away from valuable teaching time.[/quote]
How does setting reading homework ensure they’re being read to every day? It doesn’t.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:41

[quote IlsaLund]@Pumperthepumper because 30 children - 30 comments is 30-30 minutes of wasted time in a jam packed schedule.[/quote]
Why set it then?

Hercisback · 06/10/2021 21:41

'need to concentrate more on phonics' is a meaningless statement. All its does is make a parent feel better.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:41

@Hercisback

'need to concentrate more on phonics' is a meaningless statement. All its does is make a parent feel better.

Ok - ‘needs to practice recognising -ou sounds in words’

SionnachRua · 06/10/2021 21:42

@Hercisback

Why would a teacher mark a reading record? That's nuts.

Especially as it's flippin' Reception and the child can't read the comment anyway. OP wants a Gold Star For Mummy, really.

IlsaLund · 06/10/2021 21:42

@Pumperthepumper
The reading at home is beneficial to the pupil
The teacher needs to know if that is happening - hence the requirement for parental comments
A written comment from the teacher isn't beneficial because they will have given the child verbal feedback

TheGrumpyGoat · 06/10/2021 21:42

The OP didn’t say it was ‘reading homework’. She said she had filled in the reading diary every day after reading with her child and that it wasn’t commented upon.
The point of a reading diary is to show that you’re reading daily with your child (or not, in which case the school needs to target their reading support).

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:43

[quote IlsaLund]@Pumperthepumper
The reading at home is beneficial to the pupil
The teacher needs to know if that is happening - hence the requirement for parental comments
A written comment from the teacher isn't beneficial because they will have given the child verbal feedback[/quote]
How do they know it’s happening though?

IlsaLund · 06/10/2021 21:43

@Pumperthepumper

How do the parents know? Because that is what happens in school

I'm a bit baffled by your questions to be honest.

NellWilsonsWhiteHair · 06/10/2021 21:44

I think OP is getting a hard time here. Mumsnet of course is a weird mix of teacher-bashing and 'you must never grumble about school ever ever ever, don't be so entitled', so this is not surprising.

Yes it's a really tough adjustment from nursery to school, in terms of how much info you get back about your child's day. It becomes normal eventually but it is an adjustment.

Joggers is a luckier uniform option than many poor 4 year olds get, but again it's a shame to have different info from different sources and also policing children's clothes (assuming they're clean and allow for decency and movement etc) is annoying and stupid, if deeply entrenched. Not that many years back we expected school children (boys anyway) to wear shorts year round and not complain. I'm sure having 30 children grumble that they're cold is annoying, but I'm not convinced that mandating long trousers fixes this, and even if they don't grumble about being cold they'll surely find something else.

I'm going to go against the grain and say that my son's teachers in reception and Y1 did find time to scribble something encouraging in his reading diary every week. Really not a private school. They were fab and v experienced teachers, if that's worth mentioning.

Finally - yes it's been a tough 18 months for all age groups. All the teachers I know are mindful of the fact that this cohort and their parents are coming in with some atypical experiences, and adjusting accordingly- whether that's a cohort of 3 year olds, 4 year olds, 11 year olds, whatever. I got that OP wasn't saying it's only four year olds who've missed out, and in any case the urge to rank this crap is so reductive.

OP (if you're still reading) - it will start to feel more normal. You're not unreasonable to be upset though. Some of it is rubbish really.

TheGrumpyGoat · 06/10/2021 21:44

They know it’s happening because the parent is writing in the diary.

Hercisback · 06/10/2021 21:44

How do they know it’s happening though?

Writing in the diary doesn't mean that the reading is happening. It's only proof the diary has been written in.

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:44

[quote IlsaLund]@Pumperthepumper

How do the parents know? Because that is what happens in school

I'm a bit baffled by your questions to be honest.[/quote]
My question is; if the reading record isn’t being used as a homework tool, and by that I mean, as a way for the kid to do targeted reading practice at home, why set it?

Pumperthepumper · 06/10/2021 21:45

@TheGrumpyGoat

They know it’s happening because the parent is writing in the diary.

That doesn’t mean the kid it being read to though.

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