Any1 notice others are uncomfortable with breastfeeding toddlers?

[Sophie1029734]

I have an 18m old who breastfeeds. She needs it to sleep, may wake up thirsty for some milk, feeds multiple times in the day. It's her desicion to stop, whenever it happens I'll be happy she got to choose when.

I've become so disentised from boobs and sometimes find myself saying to family, think she wants some boob. I dont think about what I'm saying, im just so used to it. But for some reason it makes people so uncomfortable now that she is a toddler and not a baby.
For example, we were at her nans and she was walking around and said mamma boo boo. Everyone jumped in to say, no she said baby and wanted her doll. When the breastfeeding convo comes up, everyone's chatting about when they stopped etc I'll just make convo and say yh.. ill let her decide when to stop and the room goes silent. If LO mentions the word boob the room goes silent. A topic they didnt mind has become something that makes them uncomfortable and sometimes disgusted, I see it all over their face. My family couldnt care less and actively tell me it's an amazing thing, yet none of them were able to breastfeed and those so uncomfortable with the topic did or have watched close family do it.
Anyone else notice others become uncomfortable with you breastfeeding because your child is a toddler?

OK,in using my DC as anecdotal evidence I was wrong, I believe their good health as babies was and is luck and also in the early years due to breastfeeding.
However as a basic fact obviously human milk is better for human babies and toddlers than v processed cow milk designed to feed calves. No amount of arguing against this makes this any less true.
What I find totally bizarre is the vast majority of mothers formula feed, just look at how low bf rates are so mother's who actually bf are in the minority yet they are the ones that have to defend themselves against comments etc.
Op of course it's way more beneficial and your baby would already have been protected by you and given the best start nutrition wise. What you are doing is not only physically healthy for you and your baby but also great emotionally and if you are both happy to continue it's nothing to do with other ppls issues or insecurities.

*Weird how in nature, goats don't give their young cow's milk, and sheep don't give their lambs donkey milk.

Why give a human baby the milk of another animal when we can make it ourselves?*

But... adults drink cows milk. Why don't we all drink human milk

@Boshmama

I am vegan actually! Became vegan once I started breastfeeding and realised how bloody weird and unnecessary cows milk is. If adult humans were meant to drink milk we would continue lactating last natural weaning age (between 4 - 7 years old)

And no, I don’t drink my own milk obviously! There is no need. I have oat milk if I fancy something ‘milky’

Fair enough, if you don't drink milk. I find it odd when cows milk drinkers give this argument, and act like there's no cut off to drinking breastmilk at all lol

No it doesn't give eternal life but yes it is healthier. Harmless habit ...

Thank you @Notgoodnews, for your brilliant post x

I found I got a lot of "are you still feeding/ when do you think you'll stop" type conversation from the inlaws around 9-12 month's, then it was never mentioned again and kind of felt like the elephant in the room if my toddlers wanted to feed. Though once mine were walking they were generally more interested in exploring and playing while were out, and only want milk in the morning or evening, so that avoided a lot of the awkwardness.

@Abitlost2 still waiting for that study that says bfing makes your kids noticeably healthier

Really why does it bother anyone else how a mother chooses to feed her baby? Breast, bottle, sippy cup - who cares?

If anyone feels uncomfortable seeing an infant feeding from their mum then they really need to address that themselves and reflect upon their own hang ups.

Sad to see some of the very judgemental responses on this thread.

@Sprogonthetyne , I found that too. My dcs all self weaned anyway around 18 months as they were more interested in solid foods at that stage so nobody saw if they bf the odd morning before that.
My family were all really supportive of bf and both my mum and mil bf all their dcs too so I think if ppl are generally more educated about it that's a big help too. Best of luck op and you should be proud of yourself.

@NotAnotherPylon

I shouldn't read posts like this because some of the responses always ruin my day. That first response about the fact we don't live in a third world country is so ignorant and offensive, I don't even know where to start.

The prejudice against 'extended' breastfeeding is shocking. I put the word extended in inverted commas because, as far as I'm concerned, that's a matter of opinion. People should be able to make their own choices, whether to bottle feed, to breastfeed, to keep breastfeeding going until its natural conclusion, without judgement. Despite the fact that my feeding choices were just something I got on with as best I could, I still had tuts, eye rolls and unwanted, usually ill informed, opinions. Not once have I ever offered anyone my opinion to any other woman about how she feeds her baby/toddler. I get a lot of stuff wrong in life, but keeping my fucking opinion to myself unless it's asked for, is something I get right.

Yep, I feel exactly the same.

@Disneycharacter

My DD used to say 'titty'! She finally gave it up at 4. 😂😂😂

This comment has made my day 😂

Honestly I think childhood obesity linked to infant formula really needs a lot more research. I think many FF babies are being over fed from birth.

I have a group of friends (4 other mothers) we met at a breastfeeding group and all gave zero formula.

Our kids are all very slim compared to many other in their classes/families.

Having seen FF friends counting the ounces and coaxing more milk down their babies as the bottle isn't finished (or giving them hungry milk so they'll sleep longer) I'm sure it has a lasting effect. These kids are given too much nutrition if anything.

"90% of the people replying on this thread haven’t breastfed"

That's not true. On what basis are you basing this.

I did, both ds's.

But even I'm not a fan, but not opposed, of extended breastfeeding post say aged 2, or so, which meets the who guidelines. At aged 4, I would think it's surely time to stop soon. They are in nursery full time then, about to start school.

Being at nursery or school is completely unrelated to what milk a child is drinking.

Sure it's a mother's job to make sure they will be ok without breastfeeding for that number of hours.

But what has what they eat/drink out of nursery/school (unless it's something that would harm them) got to do with them going to school?

[quote Realyorkshiretea]@EishetChayil to be fair animals don’t go to work or need others to look after their young so they can pay the bills. So not comparable really.[/quote]
Animals do work and many animals do share the upbringing of their young, so you're wrong on both counts.

@Somethingsnappy really? I’ve never seen a lion or cow on my commute.

@Somethingsnappy talk about reaching

So there are tons of mammals who pop off out to jobs with young still of milk-drinking age and then another of the same breed of mammals feeds that baby mammal - yeah?

Because the only example (beyond humans hand rearing animals) I can think of is when animals raise orphans. By letting them feed from them. In effect wet nursing.

Which would absolutely make most of the anti-BF lot on this post lose their MINDS in a human situation.

@HowYouDoinnn

"They would probably love to wean their children earlier, given the chance."

Wow. This right here stinks of a superiority complex.

You've misunderstood - I meant that if a mother is living in poverty in an undeveloped country, with no running water and can barely afford food, then out of necessity she might be forced to breastfeed for longer than she would choose to do. Mothers in those situations don't have a choice. I'm unsure why you accuse me of having a "superiority complex", just for bringing this aspect into the discussion.

Most babies have teeth by the time they are a year old, so maybe that's nature's way of saying they're ready for solid food.

OP, if your child is healthy and you are happy to continue with BF for a bit longer than other mums, that's great. Other people may find it a bit weird to see toddlers breastfeeding, but it's your body, your child and your choice.

I breast fed both my DS until they were one. My comments are based on my own experience, as are everyone else's.
I do believe that some mothers continue to breastfeed for their own benefit though i.e they enjoy it and feel it brings them a closeness to their child.
I'll tell you an anecdotal story, my SIL bf her 3rd and last child until she was 4. Stopped just before she started school (August birthday)
She went away for a few days when my niece was about 3 leaving her in the care of Granny. 3 yr old niece never once asked for mummy's milk, never even mentioned it. SIL came home, niece still didn't ask for it, but on giving her mum a cuddle, SILs boobs leaked everywhere. Oh, I'll have to feed her, look at my milk leaking everywhere said SIL.
That was entirely for SILs benefit, not for my niece's who would otherwise have happily weaned at that point. SIL knew this was her last baby and wasn't ready to let go.
I'm not actually against anyone extended bFing but I do think mums should be honest about why they are doing it, and sometimes admit that they benefit just as much, if not more than the child.

I wouldn't be at all fussed at your toddler feeding. I would however wince at you saying, "Think she wants some boob." Partly because I hate the word boob, partly because I'm a pedant - presumably your child actually wants some milk. It's as weird as suggesting an older child might be thirsty and "want some cup," at least to me.

But that might just be me. I admit that I don't find breastfeeding (which I have done since DD was born - she's 9 months now and has never had a bottle) to be a particularly magical bonding experience. It's a handy way of providing my child with fluid/ nutrition, no more, no less, for me. So maybe that effects how I think or talk about it.

It's threads like this that make me hate MN!

"It's not right to still be feeding human milk your human infant, they should be on cows milk now." Seriously think about that for a minute? Whoever has that skewed opinion needs to go and have a little quiet think to themselves.

You continue to do whatever is right for you OP like all breastfeeding mums should. Opinions really are like arseholes and there are plenty of arseholes on here.

[quote NatashaRf]@Somethingsnappy talk about reaching

So there are tons of mammals who pop off out to jobs with young still of milk-drinking age and then another of the same breed of mammals feeds that baby mammal - yeah?

Because the only example (beyond humans hand rearing animals) I can think of is when animals raise orphans. By letting them feed from them. In effect wet nursing.

Which would absolutely make most of the anti-BF lot on this post lose their MINDS in a human situation. [/quote]
If you read my post, I didn't actually say any of those things you have just listed in your first paragraph.

Folk saying there's no point in breastfeeding a baby past the age of 1 are wrong and probably know it on some level. Research everywhere proves the nutritional and emotional benefits. A simple Google search gives all the results you need.
My MIL was quite anti breastfeeding my kids when they were over 18 months. I just ignored her.
It is always refreshing to see mums breastfeeding older children out and about.

@Somethingsnappy what do you mean then when you say animals work? Can you elaborate?

@FortunesFave

I know it's good for them but because we don't live in a third world country, it's also unnecessary. By 18 months children need solids and no longer need milk...they can have cow's milk and gain all the nutrients they need from that.

Loving relationships aren't dependent on breast feeding.

I’m not a massive fan of the phrase ‘wanting boob’. I breast fed both of mine to toddlerhood but can’t say it really came up much in conversation as much as it seems to for the OP.

However. Can you really not see that it’s a bit weird to think that a human child should have milk from a whole different species in preference to their own?