Anyone want to join me in my "let 'em be children fgs" campaign?

[hunkermunker]

It involves NOT setting arbitrary dates for things such as:

stopping bottles/breastfeeding
being out of nappies
sucking thumbs/fingers
having a comfort blanket

and probably lots more things I can think of.

Because all this sort of judgemental "ooh, I hate seeing a child of x age doing y thing" stuff is bullshit and none of anyone else's business. All children develop and achieve things at different ages and it would be very nice if people realised that once in a while.

No?

There have been a study of one mum with her 3 SN children and they all were clean and dry by 18 months.

I believe it would work for all babies, however I could be very wrong ;)

you ARE wrong! trust me, ds3 cannot be dry, he can't even show if he is dirty yet.

But will back off despite being very at that, as this is hunkers very good thread and not the place.

I did not mean to cause upset, sounds like I am wrong.

DS1 couldn't have been clean or dry any earlier. He simply didn't understand it and he was very anxious about it. So I left him be and he's been utterly brilliant and now cheerfully poos on strange loos. The alternative, forcing him when he was younger (I'm not up for EC, BE!), was not something I could do - I had DS2 when DS1 was 21mo and the logistics of it would've driven me potty [ha]

DS2's different and I think he might be clean and dry sooner. But I don't know.

The added benefit of leaving them until they are older is that you can sometimes miss out the potty altogether - from nappy straight to child toilet seat. No mess and no hassle!

So does the fact that both of my children were in their own rooms at 6 months, drinking from lidded cups at 12 months, drinking from open cups at 24 months, daytime potty trained at 24/26 months, never thumbsucked or had a dummy and DS never had a comforter while DD has had several bizarre comforters ranging from a plastic strawberry to a room thermometer to a pink rabbit (current phase is a piglet and a po), mean that they are not actually children?

come again?

bozza, don't think you have quite got the gist of this thread. If your children have done all those things early, then great!

We want to take a stand against those who try to pressurise us into making our children do things before they are good and ready.

oh I somehow feel I have earned my place here already

can i please add not sending them to nursery or school before they are ready, and not making every blinking activity in the world educational or trying to teach them stuff all the time

just let them get on with it, they will be fine. Children are fab. Hoorah.

Bozza, it's about letting children do thing when they're ready - doesn't matter when that is. I certainly don't suggest keeping them in nappies beyond when they need them!

Piglet and Po sound very sweet - DS1's taken a toy light sabre to bed with him in the past

Yes gibberish I do see the point. It is just that I feel that some of these messages are going the other way and implying that children who do meet the prescribed milestones are missing out on their childhood.

Am I being over-sensitive? Should I go back to Facebook that I have just registered for tonight. Currently my only friend is DH, who is sat downstairs watching TV.

Piglet and Po beyond acceptable in my book hunker - especially since they are pretty unlikely to fall down the back of the bed in the middle of the night.

Yes you are being over sensitive! But then so are we most probably Isn't meant to sound like we are taking a pop at those whose children do things at an early age. They are all different. I have four and they have all done things at different ages. dd2 taught herself to ride a bicycle when she had just turned 3 whereas dd4 has only just learned and is almost 7!

I disagree. Nurseries are a perfect place for children. Better than spending a morning shopping with mummy at sainsburys.

Franca, no disagreeing on my thread

Oh come on, let me disagree for once. Just a tiny bit then

Can I disagree with Fran disagreeing? Or do two disagrees make an agree?

My head hurts.

that's complicated. but of course I don't mind if you disagree with me disagreeing. I like to be the only woman on MN who loves nurseries.

Oh, you're allowed to love nurseries. For your own children. You just mustn't extrapolate from your experience and say that all children should love going to nursery. DS1, for instance, loves coming to Sainsbos - he likes to ask the nice lady for some spicy sausage and a bit of cheese at the deli counter

I don't extrapolate more than you do, though.

sorry forgot the

Agree with the OP for the most part. However - sorry - I really, really have an issue with children being met from reception class with a bottle of milk. Seen on more than one occasion. Expect I'll take a hammering for that, but that's my opinion!

Great thread, absolutely agree.

DD and DS both self-potty-trained with minimum fuss, DD was 2.5 yo, DS 3 yo. DS not dry at night yet, but I do not care. He still has very wet nappies in the morning so is obviously not ready yet. Why should I take him off nappies at night and have to change his sheets every morning? Would make me grumpy and him embarrassed.

I like to tell the competitive Mums that I am a completely lazy mum who just lets her DCs get on with it.

I think the point of this thread is to let them be what they want to be. And, actually, to let parents be what they want to be. i had two very very early talkers, but who were very late out of nappies. I encouraged the talking because it was fun and gave us all pleasure -I wasn't bothered about the nappy thing because it didn't matter to us either way -I was happy to change nappies as long as they were happy for me to change them. Neither of mine liked lidded cups, so they learnt how to manage an ordinary one very early. ds loved his dummy so he had it at bed time til he gave it up himself at 4.5. dd loves her teddy and is cuddled up to him as I type at nearly 12 (years that is, not months!) Let them be - they grow up automatically!