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Original poster

Anyone want to join me in my "let 'em be children fgs" campaign?

168 replies

hunkermunker · 27/10/2007 00:56

It involves NOT setting arbitrary dates for things such as:

stopping bottles/breastfeeding
being out of nappies
sucking thumbs/fingers
having a comfort blanket

and probably lots more things I can think of.

Because all this sort of judgemental "ooh, I hate seeing a child of x age doing y thing" stuff is bullshit and none of anyone else's business. All children develop and achieve things at different ages and it would be very nice if people realised that once in a while.

No?

OP posts:
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gibberish · 28/10/2007 01:58

Exactly. At their own pace, not at yours, or any other child's or parent's.

If someone else's son or daughter is fluently reading at 2 or properly potty trained at 1, then excellent! Don't criticise and deride but at the same time, don't let them pressure your child to be the same. They are individuals.

I love this thread. It's the first one for absolutely ages that I feel passionate about.

CorpseBrideOfJohnCusack · 28/10/2007 03:36

potty training - HAH
I laugh in the face of it
If any bugger fancies having a pop at persuading my extremely stubborn DD to do it, then good luck to them. I'm giving up again and sod everyone who thinks that if she isn't done by the time she's 3 (in 2 months). I'm just not up to the task and I have decided NOT TO CARE

CorpseBrideOfJohnCusack · 28/10/2007 03:46

oops I make no sense when I'm ranting
'who thinks that she isn't done by the time she's 3 then she must be rather backward'
is what I meant to say

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting
seeker · 28/10/2007 05:35

My mother thinks all children should have "This Grows Up Automatically" written across their foreheads!

HAs anybody on this thread read a book caller "Do no Distrub" by Deborah Jackson? I think she may be your guru!

onebadmother · 28/10/2007 07:23

Have to say no-one (apart from health visitor! Result!)has every criticized my child-rearing to my face... Maybe I'm too scary? Or very very thick-skinned..?

Aaaanyways. What did all these beady types who make you feel bad do before they had kids? Did they all spring fully-formed from child-bed, or were they always beatches?

TheUnholyTrinityRhino · 28/10/2007 07:24

I would like to sign up to this too

dd1 has a cushion that she has had since she was 13 months and sleeps with it every night. I have been known to drive a 20 min round trip to collect it from nanas where she had left it from a sleep over. I didn't think twice about doing it, it is her comfort and I am happy for her to have it. she is nearly 8.

dd2 sucks her thumb and when she was youndg lots of people told me to give her dummy quick, don't let her suck her thumb, you can alwasy take the dummy away!!
But I don't feel the need to take away her comfort so I am fine with her thumbsucking. She will be 3 in april.

Both dd1 and dd2 had bottles of water whenever they wanted a drink till they choose to have a cup at around 2 ish for both of them.

dd1 chose to start using the toilet at 2 and a half and dd2 chose to start using the toilet at 26 months.

I was being slightly hassled about not training them but kept my cool and went with my children.

Hear hear to 'let them be children fgs'

Mossy · 28/10/2007 07:26

Oh yes can I join? Fantastic idea!!

Already I have people saying "he still sleeps in your bed?!" and "he isn't sleeping through the night?!"

Ds is six and a half months of age.

squimlet · 28/10/2007 08:58

lol at the sleeping through. DS didnt really sleep through till he was about 14 months old. People kept looking at me with pity when I told them he was still waking in the night.
Know what I said?

"am I bovered!!??"

LOL

TheUnholyTrinityRhino · 28/10/2007 09:00

oh yes also dd2 wasn't sleeping through in her own bed until she was 23 months

and gecko sleeps with me, is still waking every two hours and she is 9 months

ghoulmoonfiend · 28/10/2007 09:11

can I add mytuppence woth as a mum with older children and say I Want Play Equipment For Children Over, say, the age of Seven! All the parks round here have wonderful climbing frames for younger children and the older ones reach 10 and are suddenly Too Big.
There was thread on here about 12 years olds wanting to come into a soft play place and loads of mums were saying ''why did they want to come in..mutter mutter, at their age etc''. Why Not? There are many adults who like swings, trampolines and big slides and many 12 years olds would still play given a chance. As there is nothing to play on and no where to play, they start raoming round in gangs.

To those of you with small ones, my 10-year-old still has a teddy and blamket at night. But it transpires, through many sleepovers - so do most of his pals

Hunker, sign me up, let children be children!

squishie · 28/10/2007 09:11

oh yes and my favourite "you are making a rod for your own back". because i am an idiot to let my 2.5 yo into my bed for a breastfeed at 5am rather than letting him scream in own room for an hour.

seeker · 28/10/2007 09:23

When my dd went to Brownie camp (she was 10) it was COMPULSORY to bring a teddy. Brown Owl said she always did it so that nobody need feel uncomfortable about needing theirs!

sfrightx · 28/10/2007 09:24

this comes in handy as Christmas approaches and we will have the in laws making small comments, ever so discretely about how we are really doing it all wrong

don't go to her all every time she whimpers she will be clingy - dd very confident outgoing little 2yr old

why bf and why for so long she will be clingy

  • dd self weaned calmly and without fuss just recently which I am kind of sorry about as have to think what else I can do to raise an eyebrow this time
TheUnholyTrinityRhino · 28/10/2007 09:25

seeker, thats a lovely idea your Brown Owl had

francagoestohollywood · 28/10/2007 09:29

dd is 3 and still needs a bottle of warm milk when she wakes up.
ds started peeing in the toilet at 2 and a half but wore nappies for his poo for another year, as he was scared to poo in the potty/toilet.
And I agree with MB, I hope there'll be no sign of adolecentisms at 8 or 9. I wouldn't know how to cope (given that I enter adolescence at 25 )

squimlet · 28/10/2007 10:15

oh and my 4 year old who is going to school still has warm milk in the mornign with her little brother

Nightynight · 28/10/2007 10:34

"you are making a rod for your own back" has got to be the most irritating comment to another parent.

ghoulmoonfiend · 28/10/2007 10:37

both my boys still like warm milk on a cold day...

munchkinmum · 28/10/2007 10:39

COUNT ME WELL AND TRULY IN.

Was shocked when a bus driver said directly to me as I was getting off a bus - "you are a cruel mother for not letting her have a dummy" - just because she was tired and sucking her thumb!

She has always sucked her thumb as a comfort (so no need for a dummy) and I am not bothered when she decides to let this go in the future.

DON'T JUDGE MY DAUGHTER OR MYSELF!!

(rant over - thanks!)

bumperlicious · 28/10/2007 10:42

According to my mother my 4 month old DD needs to stop bfing and go into her own bedroom in order to detach from me

(Though I think this is less about the desire to make her grow up and more a desire to be able to kidnap her for the weekend )

That said I am fretting over the fact that DD is so reliant on a dummy and think I should perhaps wean her off it.

Someone give me a slap.

nooka · 28/10/2007 10:43

I can't remember anyone getting on my case about when my children did various things when they were small. So I suspect that they were either fairly average for most things, or I didn't really listen to what people said. I did think it was ridiculous when my father said of dd a couple of days ago that she was "being childish" (she was wailing about something fairly insignificant). I said well she is a child (she's 7)! What a daft comment - what he actually meant was that she was being annoying, and over emotional, which was entirely true, and also fairly predicatbel behaviour for a seven year old. I wouldn't say of him that he was being "oldish" when he grumbles or gets stressed (which I would consider to be equivalent, and also entirely understandable behaviour). Just let it all wash over your head, I say.

bumperlicious · 28/10/2007 10:48

Oh and me and my best friend still played with our cabbage patch dolls () and barbies while some of my school friends were starting to have sex

Nightynight · 28/10/2007 11:12

lol I was the same. Remember covertly admitting to still reading Enid Blyton age 15 with several other very kind girls.

LittleBellaLugosi · 28/10/2007 11:26

LOL at this timely thread

Count me in

kerala · 28/10/2007 11:37

Very timely!

Have a competitive parent friend who is a dear but seems to think that if her dd is weaned early/has a minute by minute routine (bath at 6.45pm sharp) etc she will get some sort of medal. It sends me in the opposite direction - I love telling her about my dd who won't walk at 14 months, and when asked when bedtime is saying "sometime between 6.30 and 9".