Anyone want to join me in my "let 'em be children fgs" campaign?

[hunkermunker]

It involves NOT setting arbitrary dates for things such as:

stopping bottles/breastfeeding
being out of nappies
sucking thumbs/fingers
having a comfort blanket

and probably lots more things I can think of.

Because all this sort of judgemental "ooh, I hate seeing a child of x age doing y thing" stuff is bullshit and none of anyone else's business. All children develop and achieve things at different ages and it would be very nice if people realised that once in a while.

No?

Count me in !

ME!!!

DD1 (3.3) still has a dummy and night nappy

DD2 (2) still has dummy, bottle and in nappies 24.7

Bothered?! Nope. They will give it all up when THEY are ready.... how many adults are there out there in nappies with dummies and bottles? Exactly.

You would be surprised how many adults out there need a night nappy! Especially after hitting the bottle...

As for children being children - yes let them be and do in their own time and at their own pace - not be ruled by a text book.

I'm in. Let children be children I say, it's over too quickly anyway, why rush it even more?

LynetteScavo, honestly it makes me feel ill when I think about it. I'd had it since I was about 3.
It was cotton bedspread that my nan used to put on my mums bed when she was little so it was probably about 40 yrs old when I got it!

We have a big cotton throw on our bed and the other morning Ds4 started to stir and in a sleepy daze I thought my blanket had returned. The throw had rolled over the top of the duvet and was up against my face....it felt and smelt just like my old blanket. I actually felt quite sad when I woke up properly and realised it wasn't...

Am in!!!!

DD1 4.5 has been trying really hard to stop her night time pullups, but a fter a week of duvet/ pilllow/ sheet/ and hairwashing we have put it on hold for a bit longer. She said "Mummy it just happens when I'm dreaming, and I really like my dreams, so I can't help it at the moment."

DD1 2.5 asks to use the potty occasionally, but most of the time can't be bothered, we will wait until she really wants to, same as DD1, who stopped day nappies at 3 and never had a single accident.

Do get comments though from others who go for the "We're not leaving the house yuntil we have this cracked" school of thought.

Oh am deffo in and in answer to all those friends and relatives...

No I won't be 'getting that baby out of my bed any time soon'. And to one particular friend who shall remain nameless and tactless, no I am not making a mistake in not 'conditioning' dd. She is not a laboratory rat she's a baby, a 5 month old baby.

I'M IN!

I get people making comments because ds (4.7) is still in nappies/pull ups at night. FFS, I've tried everything and he's just plain not ready. BOTHERED???? NO!! (well, apart from the endless waking up wet coz he wees too much and they leak )

Anyway, all these people judge and yet I'm sure Dr's don't get worried about it unless they are 7 or something.

I love this thread!

Already posted but just remembered when DS toilet trained. Tried him on potty about 4 times at around 2 - completely not interested. Left him alone on the matter with a Winnie the Pooh toilet seat next to the big toilet. One day at around 3 and a bit he put it on the toilet used it and has never looked back with no prompting whatsoever. Had a dummy at night till he was four as well much to my parents disgust. Everything I have worried about he has stopped by himself with no pressure from us at all.

Still only wants to watch the nice gentle programmes on C Beebies and Nick Jr as well and he is a really gentle sweet kid. I must admit I was worried that he DIDNT want to watch Power Rangers etc even though I didnt want him to either. Thought he was supposed to want to. Reassured after reading this thread.

Right, all you signees, your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to cast your eye over threads on MN and every time there's a sniff of a poster saying "Oh, I hate seeing children of x age still doing y" you post to say "oh let 'em be children fgs" OK?

Some excellent points from some very intelligent posters on this thread. Yes, I mean you, you clever thing.

Watch this space - I think this could be a BIG parenting movement, bigger than Truby King or Continuum Thing or Spock-ing (all that time I spent NOT potty training my brilliant DS1, I spent learning how to Make Rhymes instead).

I'm mildly intoxicated, but I shall press post anyway

What an EXCELLENT thread!

After having four children, I have realised that it doesn't matter what anyone thinks. It doesn't matter when your children do certain things. They are all individuals and will reach milestones when they are good and ready, not before. Worrying about it and trying to make them 'conform' will not make it happen any sooner, in all probabiliy have the opposite effect.

I HE. Have discovered that when children are left to their own devices they learn what they need to, when they need to and usually in a much shorter time span than if they are pushed. No-one should tell us when and what our children should be doing. It is primarily up to our children and for us to simply encourage and be there when they need us to be.

Everyone else should BUTT OUT. Trust your instincts.

Rant over.

what's the big deal about getting them off bottles at night, does anyone know? is it a tooth thing?

No, it's a bullying thing.

My understanding from whatever it is I read on the subject of giving up bottles is that the shape of the teat means milk (or whatever is in the bottle) pools behind the bottom teeth, making them more likely to decay. I thought babies swallowed milk rather than leaving it in their mouths, but I'm no dentist...

Can i sign up?
I'm a long term menber of the 'if they're still doing it at 16, let the army sort it out' club

yes, but how is that so different from the bottles that we're encouraged to use, those weirdy plasticky things with the solid teat?

Ooooh me me me! I'll sign up!

DD has just stopped wearing nappies at night this week (she's 4.5 yrs). DS, at 2.5 is still in nappies and I'm really NOT looking at changing anything.

Oh, and DS still has his night time milk from an avent bottle with a butchered teat. [unremorseful]

You know what? All this 'my child is potty trained at 1.8 months' is crap. Literally - all over the house.

Left mine until they were at least 3 in nappies until THEY told ME they needed their nappy changing. Was no potty training involved - once they knew when they needed to go that was that. One day they were in nappies, the next day they were out. Easy peasy. Running around with a potty, trying to catch whatever is flowing out of them does not mean they are potty trained.

Give them time - they will do it when they are ready, not when you want them to be.

Absolutely gibberish.

Isn't that "Absolutely, gibberish"? Or it looks like you're disagreeing

LOL!

I am concurring with gibberish, yes

Can I just make a small addition to this thread (since I've linked it from another thread where there seem to be posters of a "yuck, your child of x years is still doing y" bent)?

I'd like to say that I'm suggesting that children be allowed to do things like potty train and stop breastfeeds/bottles at their own pace.

I am NOT suggesting forcing a child who is clearly ready to stop wearing nappies, etc to continue to do so.

If you have a child who potty trains beautifully at a month old and says "Actually, Mummy, I'd rather drink from a cup than that bottle" at a year, you can still join. But not if you assume that your experience is the only one that matters or should count and that everyone's children should do the same as your own and not if you say "yuck". Definitely not if you say yuck. You can yuck off if you say yuck...

Love a duck, dont want a ruck, but fuck off at the yuck. Phuck.