Awful day with DS

[daisy86]

DS is just over 6 months old. I’ve put him down for three naps today and he’s been a nightmare to settle every time, crying, tossing and turning for around 20 minutes before finally falling asleep. He’s then slept for just 40 minutes per nap, so I’ve had barely any respite to relax or get anything done. It feels like so much effort and stress to settle him down for just 40 minutes of sleep!

I take him up for naps every 2.5 hours and I can see that he’s showing tiredness signals like rubbing his eyes. But as soon as I put him in his cot he will start crying and like I say, only sleep for one sleep cycle when he does finally settle. I wish I knew where the blissful two hour naps of old have gone.

Also, he woke from his last nap at 2pm today, so has just gone down for his last sleep of the day. I’m concerned that it’s too close to his bedtime (usually 7pm) but I could hardly keep him up for five hours (i.e. from 2-7pm) at his age.

I’m also weaning him following the Joe Wicks Wean in 15 method, which suggests introducing babies to bitter veg initially (such as broccoli and kale) before moving onto sweeter things like carrot and sweet potato. We’re still in the “bitter” phase and he has hated everything I’ve tried - he hasn’t even swallowed anything yet.

All the photos I’ve seen on Instagram show babies happily smearing food all over their faces and seemingly loving it, but DS just grimaces and refuses to eat anything. Where am I going wrong?

Is baby porridge and rice ok from a health point of view? What about jars and pouches of food like Ella’s Kitchen? I just want to give DS the healthiest start possible.

Anbesol is amazing. It has a very, very small amount of local anaethetic in it which works so well.

I would try reddy brek rather than baby porridge. Wuth pouches you just need to remember that they heat them up quite a bit and so they lose the nutrients. My 7 month old lapped up all the single bitter veg, sweet veg and fruit but started clamping when I started puree ing full meals. Sometimes he does have pouches, but I now alternate a spoonful of pouch with my food. They like the smoothness of pouches because there's zero challenge in eating them

Also try a nice smooth fruit puree on the reddy brek such as peach or mango

I haven't got any advice. it sounds knackering.

Just keep putting him to bed and leaving him to it. He will get there.

6 months is a really tough age and you are doing far better than you think you are! It's hard!

My DS is now 16 months. I was you! Trying to perfectly wean him, following a load of bollocks Instagram accounts (I'm looking at you Joe wicks) because I felt like I didn't really know what I was doing. He didn't take to food as easily as I expected which caused so much stress, he wouldn't nap anywhere except on me. I got nothing done.

DS wouldn't fit into these so called routines. I had to adjust my life around him and just go with it. If he wouldn't sleep we went out in the car or pram, or I'd just cosy up on the sofa and feed him to sleep on my lap. I stopped following weaning accounts and just started to give him bits of mashed potato or some of what I was eating. I stopped comparing our lives to others. He now eats just about everything and naps on his own. There were some seriously tough days for sure (we still have the odd hard day now!!) But give yourself a break! Take a step back and just enjoy him and follow his lead. I only wish enough people had just told me to "chill out" at the time. Easier said than done, I know. But you will get there.

14 years ago I weaned both mine on annabel Karmel. Think it introduced sweet veg and baby rice from very early on. Both have great appetites, eat most things and my son even hates chocolate!! She did a very good timetable.

Tbh if my first taste was broccoli or kale l wouldn’t be keen either.

I started ds on baby rice and potato.

He’s 26 now, deffo doesn’t have a sweet tooth and thin as a rake. Ugh broccoli and kale as first foods.

Yeah l weaned my dd 14 on Annabel Karmel. She was fine. Loved carrots

Baby rice and porridge is fine. I started mine on mashed banana then maybe carrot. I sometimes used shop bought purees too, they're ideal if you're going out.

All babies have a sweet tooth surely? Milk is sweet! I had a look at wean in 15 when I was at that stage with mine. It was the biggest load of wank I'd ever seen. You could very much tell that Joe Wicks, for all his virtues, had only ever weaned one fairly compliant child. Step away from Instagram!

Mine has never been a great eater, but I tried to see food as more of a sensory play thing when she was that age. The idea she was having fun squashing it and spreading it round a tray was the only thing that stopped me stressing about what she was or wasn't eating.

I wouldn’t overthink weaning too much either. You want to set up good habits but they guarantee nothing. I did BLW with my DS and was told it would reduce the risk of a fussy eater. He ate anything from 6-12 months. After 12 months, started getting fussier. By 18 months he was just awful. Battled him pointlessly for a year and made little progress. By 2.5 years, he started eating a wider range of food again by himself. He’s not perfect now but he’s an awful lot better.

Just offer a range of flavours and let baby work it out and explore.

So you absolutely can give pouches/Ella's kitchen/porridge but it isn't "baby led weaning" in its truest sense! But that's ok, as with milk - fed is best!

Personally - wicks has only brought a weaning book out because he happened to have a baby - he isn't a baby feeding expert. Just Chuck it!

I recently did the NCT course on weaning recently and if you do traditional weaning (porridge/pouches) etc that's absolutely fine, but you build up to finger foods/chewing. If you start BLW give whatever you're having for dinner (if it's relatively healthy) in strips as long as your finger so they can pick it up. Food is about texture and exploration for the first few months and will "eat" very little at first especially week 1!

Try to relax and enjoy. Try again on Sunday when you do a roast dinner. Put a few sprigs of broccoli, some steamed carrot sticks, bit of potato and a strip or two of chicken for him to play with and explore/taste. If he takes a bite fab, if not, no worries.

Milk is their main source of nutrients for 12m so don't sweat it!

I don't think Joe Wick's kids are very old yet are they, toddlers still? So he can't say that giving them bitter foods first makes them less fussy, he doesn't know that his are less fussy yet!

Personally I did baby led weaning with both my children, they had some of whatever we we having. Or if that wasn't possible, whatever was easy and calorie dense. Things like eggy bread and porridge fingers, peanut butter on toast, banana. I loved the baby led weaning cookbook.

They're 3 & 6 now, both good eaters but like opposite foods! Ds3 loves broccoli, banana, bolognaise, Dd6 loves salmon, melon and kale! Incidentally ds didn't touch broccoli until he was over 2, I just kept offering it and not making it a fuss.

Also wanted to say it sounds like you're doing a great job. Some days with babies do just go a bit pear shaped. I sometimes wonder if they've even read the manual...

I’m just starting to wean my 6 month old. So far he’s tried mashed banana, mashed pear, baby cereal, weetabix and then had a taster of lasagne and risotto at dinner with us. Try and go with the flow with weaning rather than follow a specific plan. Photos on Instagram will always show pictures of happy babies chomping on their vegetables. In reality it’s babies screaming with most of the food dribbled back out again and mum or dad looking stressed!! The first few times you try food, babies tend to push it back out with their tongues as they’re not used to it. Just keep persevering with little tasters once a day and gradually build the amount up. They are still getting all their nutrition from their milk so there’s no pressure.

With the naps, all you can do is persevere. Signs like rubbing of the eyes might actually be late signs of tiredness so you might need to pop him into bed a bit earlier. I normally try about 2 hours after the last nap. But today has been a day of no naps for us and screaming instead so I sympathise! Tomorrow’s a new day.

Joe wicks has weaned 2 babies, you'll get better advice from a local mums group on fb of what to try (we started with baby porridge and parsnip and sweet potato, and yes we used ellas kitchen pouches). 6 month is still tiny, let him sleep on you and try get a little rest in then. DD will sleep way longer on me than she will in her cot, so now we have a 90 mins (sometimes longer) afternoon nap together every day instead of me getting frustrated when she would only have 40 mins in her cot. Try the huckleberry app too, that was a lifesaver for me for naps when DD was around 6 month. Could time her naps pretty much to the minute, even when I thought she didn't seem tired!

Instagram is as curated as the ads on TV. Ignore them.

At 6 months, teething is imminent, if it has not yet started. I swore by teething granules (Chamomilla 6c) that you can get from the chemist, Boots or the supermarket. The standard brand is Teetha.

Napping: he does sound overtired. Right now, do whatever you have to, to get some more sleep. The sling, the pushchair, even your arms if you have him wrapped in a blanket (it stops the change in temperature when you put him down). Make sure you get a nap in too!

I used Baby Led Weaning with mine and it's much less stressful than the puree route. Basically, it's a taste of whatever you are eating.

BLW advice: www.nhs.uk/start4life/weaning/

@Clymene

Joe Wicks is a personal trainer. He knows fuck all about weaning babies.

Mix your baby's food up (not literally). Give him carrots and broccoli. Banana and yoghurt. Sweet potato and beans. Cheese and apple

This.

Listen to people who have been parents for more than 5 minutes.

@NoahsArk17 how I long for those lovely long naps with baby. Mybtoddjer dropped his nap at 2.5 when my baby was 3 months. Havent been able to nap with him since then. 😢 We've made up for it at night though 😜. At 7.5 months, he's on one night feed and generally settling after and so the night cuddles are stopping too. Pleased for a little more sleep as I am tired, but this is my last and I know I will miss it. I used to hate it when people said enjoy the cuddles, esp when I felt sleep deprived. But it's kind of true. Enjoy them whilst they're tiny, snuggle up to their lovely soft snuggly bodies. Before you know it they'll be smelly teenagers and will want nothing to do with you!

I haven't read the rest of the answers so may have been said but I would wait until you see more signs of sleepiness to try for a nap. If he needs sleep he will sleep, if he doesn't then he won't. I used to be like you and terrified of him getting overtired so would rock him frantically at the first eye rub but turns out if I waited an extra half an hour or so until he got quite grumpy he would be asleep in 10 mins and would sleep 1-2 hours instead of 40 mins because he actually needed the sleep because he's used so much energy. His night sleep improved then too because he wasn't getting too much sleep in the day. R.e weaning, give him what he likes! If he likes sweet veg so be it, it's still just as healthy as the other stuff! You really think if he doesn't like broccoli now it means he won't like it when he's 10 or 20? Moral of the story is everything you read about routines for most babies is absolute bollocks. They will sleep when they need it, they will eat as much as they want/need and they will eat what they like, so just go with the flow and you will be a lot more happier and chilled mama x

Joe Wicks is a personal trainer. He knows fuck all about weaning babies.

This with about a thousand candles on top.
He's a douche bag.

By 6 months by DS was only have two naps a day he'd have a morning one then an afternoon one for about 2 hours.

He's now 15 months and rarely has the morning unless we're in the car or he has got up earlier than usual but has kept his 2 hour afternoon nap.

Instagram is a lot of BS most of the time for parenting. It's all about 'perfection' and how their child is so well behaved etc.

You don't need to be so religious with your routine. Cut your self some slack.

The bitter phase for 2 weeks is for those idiots who would otherwise skip veg altogether. If you provide a balanced diet and offer all flavours and most types of veg you will be ok. I personally foudn babyled weaning worked best with my DS as he was interested in food and had lost his gag reflec. If yours isn’t swallowing then stop and try again in a couple of weeks.

@daisy86

Is baby porridge and rice ok from a health point of view? What about jars and pouches of food like Ella’s Kitchen? I just want to give DS the healthiest start possible.

I gave mine all of those, too. Plus Farley's rusks mixed with milk, and Weetabix.. I don't think Ella's kitchen type things were around when they were that age, but I had some Hipp Organic jars which I sometimes used if we were out and about. I mostly consulted my mum if I wasn't sure what to do. And I was definitely more fussy about DC1 than about the others.

You can just make regular rice and porridge rather than having to buy special baby porridge and rice.

Pouches and jars are great for when you’re out and about or have a grumpy baby attached to you and need to make something fast.

I would step away from social media which is all bollocks. I'm not surprised your baby wouldn't eat boiled kale. I wouldn't eat it either. (Ironically I am serving kale tonight fried in butter with nutmeg and black pepper).

My DCs as babies liked banana mixed with a avocado, porridge mixed with a fruit puree and mashed potato or sweet potato with veg. And they had loads of jars. Nowadays people will bang on about not giving fruit as it's too much sugar but at this age it's still just giving them a taste.

You honestly need to relax OP. Forget the books and the Instagram and the uber strict routine. Every baby is different, some like a routine but others dont. Everyone has bad days and good days but funnily enough they dont put the bad days on their SM. Listen to your baby and don't worry, you sound like a great mum and your baby will be fine.