Why are people so arsey about vegetarian kids?

[bohemianbint]

DS is 14 months and vegetarian, because I am - we don't have meat in the house and I don't touch it so there's no way I'd be feeding him meat even if I wanted to. (Which I don't.) The way I see it, it's not a problem, I know about what foods to give him to make sure he's not missing out and he's a very healthy lad who will eat anything.

So yesterday, my brother said me "forcing" vegetarianism on him is the same as me "forcing" religion on him and compared it to christening a child and making a fundamental decision for him.

The way I see it is he can do whatever when he's older (but I'll never be cooking it for him!) but if he chooses to be a vegetarian he can't "un-eat" the meat. If he wants to eat meat, then fine. Why should I "force" meat eating on him? I had it forced on me and it really screwed me up.

Anyone else had to deal with this sort of attitude and how do you deal with it? I found "shut up" worked reasonably well yesterday (I get so tired of justifying myself!) but not really that eloquent, is it...

lol UQD as long as it free range orgainc you'll be ok

Yes, there is a difference between coriander and meat but the point remains the same! If some came to my house for a meal and said that they could not eat anything vegetarian, i would suggest taking them out for a meal. But, as most meat eaters do also eat vegetarian food as part of their diet, I don't see what the problem is if they have a meal or two without meat in it. It would make me feel sick to even think about touching meat, never mind cooking it! whereas I assume that most omnivore do not feel the same way about cooking vegetarian food.

Unquietdad, not sure if I could stomach (sorry, couldn't resist!) someone eating meat in my home! I'd try to be polite but I have a feeling my revulsion would show!

" But that still seems an odd conclusion to draw if you take the view that it is "just what we eat"? "

No, it's very simple: I view it as just what I eat; an "arsey" meat-eater obviously does not.

Sensible, sis, at 11:34.

Though it doesn't sound as though this is the case with the OP, it would not be unreasonable to worry about a child being compelled to avoid meat if that child was not eating a healthy balanced diet. If you don't eat meat or fish, you do have to put a bit more effort into choosing what to eat and making sure you get enough protein etc. Which can be tricky with a kid who's a fussy eater: they might need a bit of a top up with milk/cheese/meat from time to time (if they don't like lentils, for instance - or have a nut allergy).

Were I hosting a kids party and catering it, I'd provide a mix of veggie and non-veggie food (and would suggest on inviting people that anyone with serious food allergies should let me know in advance) but I wouldn't have a lot of patience with anyone who threw hissy fits should their LO eat the odd sausage by mistake. It;s just not that big a deal (oh, and if it is that big a deal to you, you should get out more).

With respect, it's not that hard to eat a balanced vg diet, madamez. Much harder in WEstern world to avoid crap over-processed diet, often inc meat.

Walnutshell: I know what you mean but for a kid who refuses to eat his/her greens you could see why other people might percieve a bit of a problem. (and just as BTW becasue it's something I've occasionally wondered about, how would a vegetarian with a nut allergy manage?)

Of course, there's the other reason non veggies get fed up with veggies. All those pulses... all that farting

Greens are not the substitue for meat and surely should be incorporated in a healthy meat diet so that's not the issue.

Meat sits for longer in the gut

why is it assumed that veggies only eat lentils and pulses??

There is no point discussing vegetarianism with someone who is very anti to it.

Ive been veggie 20 years now and only received ignorant, aggressive comments/questions in that time. I refuse to talk about it now- I came to the conclusion years ago that the aggressively anti veggie stuff was actually born of the persons guilt.

BB maybe a reply to folks like this could be " I could make comments about your lifestyle or parenting choices but that would not be any of my business would it!"
If that fails tell them to insert expletive here

Madamez, as a vegetarian with a nut allergy, it really is no problem
Being a vegan with a nut allergy might be more of an issue.
I find very few people are argumentative about vegetarianism. Of the ones who are, some of them I think just like an argument, and there are some people who I think are quite defensive about eating meat. By which I'm not suggesting that the majority of meat eaters are defensive about it, just a few people.
And I wouldn't expect another parent to supervise what my children ate at a party.

Thursday, I wasn't being snidey about the nuts, just curious, because it was my understanding that if you can't eat nuts and don't eat meat or fish you might struggle to get enough protein - but I take your point about vegetarianism as opposed to veganism.

Spookles, what are the sources of protein apart from nuts, pulses and dairy, then?

Barley, Brown rice, Buckwheat, Millet, Oatmeal, Rye, Wheat germ, Wheat, hard red, Wild rice, Apples, Bananas, Cantaloupe, Grape, Grapefruit, Honeydew melon, Orange, Papaya, Peach, Pear, Pineapple, Strawberry, Tangerine, Watermelon, Artichokes, Beets, Broccoli, Brussels sprouts, Cabbage, Cauliflower, Cucumbers, Eggplant, Green peas, Green pepper, Kale, Lettuce, Mushrooms, Mustard green, Onions, Potatoes, Spinach, Tomatoes, Turnip greens, Watercress

These are all sources of protein and as long as vegetarians (and everyone else, for that matter) eat a wide variety of foods, they will easily manage to eat enough protein

I think it is very rude to think that people get arsey about vegetarian kids because they somehow feel guilty about their choice to eat meat! What a load of unimaginative claptrap.

Same as this assumption that omnivores all eat crap processed intensively reared meat.

I don't assume that all cereals and vegetables are grown on land that had people cleared off it to make way for farms and thereby judge those who eat these foods.

I find the ethical argument for being vegetarian highly tedious as almost ALL the food we eat in the west comes with some sort of ethical issue attached to it; illegal migrant workers fruit picking and packing with low pay and unacceptable working conditions, unfair trade, land clearance, price fixing, etc, etc. Do veggies honestly check out the ethics of all their foods?

Oops am I being arsey?

been out all morning and this is still going strong!!

madamz - I have catered several children's parties with all veggie food and not one child has ever asked where the meat was. It's not rocket science

Two sets of my friends with children give their children meat. I don't think they prepare it themselves but if they are out or the children are at nursery they often have meat. I've been amazed given the strength of their feeling.

One of the Mums was actually very ill for a while and the doctor told her she really had to try to eat some oily fish because her reserve of certain nutrients was so depleted but maybe she doesn't eat the right sort of vegetarian foods?

Should have said both couples are vegetarian..doesn't make sense otherwise.

I've never had my veggie DS reaching for sausages or ham or whatever at a birthday party, mostly because, like most little kids, he doesn't think, "Oh, wow. An unfamiliar food. I think I'll try that!" He thinks, "An unfamiliar food. It must be poison." They're not all that adventurous, foodwise, at 3, unless you actively coax them to try something new.

"Morningglory - If your children eat meat, then you have made a choice to let them eat it. By making this choice, you are telling them that eating meat is a good thing (because you're a loving parent, and if it wasn't a good thing, you wouldn't let them do it).

I'm not at all condemning your choice. But don't tell me you didn't make one."

Well, he does have the choice of eating meat or not. I don't make him eat it (or not eat it). I make meat available, and would really not be fussed if he chose not to eat it.

Bit late I know. But, I think people can be a little arsey about vegetarianism full stop. Because maybe they have this vague but unshiftable suspicion that vegetarians are assuming some sort of moral superiority. Which is never popular .

So vegetarian children are fair game because airing this suspicion can be couched in terms of 'oh poor malnourished child, you're brainwashing him'. Whereas with adults there is really nothing that can really be said.

Beachcomber - the 'guilt' aspect was not raised by anyone arguing about vegetarianism, it was a misinterpretation which has been addressed and which hasn't formed the main thrust of this thread.

Not all vegetarians argue the ethics of their diet as the primary reason for not eating meat. However, I find it sad that you find "the ethical argument... highly tedious" because with that logic in mind, few ethical decisions can lived out. So, yes, you are being arsey.

whilst this is going strong - anyone got any ideas for my DS1 who just will not touch meat? He loves houmas (that's lunch sorted!!) and homemade dahl but I'm worried I'm not making enough effort for him. He's quite picky but easily fooled.

Highlander - loathe as I am to put this back in Active Convo's, I can't leave your request unanswered. So if you do return, The Veg society provides a good starting point: Happy Cooking

Wow, I turned my back for a day and it got really interesting!

I've had another thought.

Me "imposing" vegetarianism onto my son = 1 person having a choice made for them

Me "imposing" meat eating onto my son = 1 person having a choice made for them and x amount of animals having the choice of being alive taken from them against their will.

So actually, if we're worried about imposing anything, the first option is the least damaging!

I don't eat meat because

1. I find it revolting 2)If something's dead I'd rather bury it than eat it 3)If you want to be a pain in the arse about it, environmentally meat production is very wasteful and if people who had a choice chose not to eat it the worls might be a better place...
2. I was physically forced to eat the stuff as a child for a few years and threw up after most meals. Believe me, I'm never getting into impositions at that level!

On the other hand, I find it difficult to condemn anyone who will kill an animal themselves to eat it in a respectful manner.