Mother in laws guide to babies

[nervousnellyisnervous]

Looking for submissions for a mother in laws guide to parenting. Please post random things you didn't know about how to raise your baby.

Mine is - on a hot day I didn't put a vest under my baby's dress. And mother in law kindly said to my baby, are you poor, will mummy not allow you a vest?

Is this a thing? Am I supposed to have her in vests all the time? Even when hot?

Because I didn't know this... I would love parenting tips from everyone's mother in law, since they're the experts.

Vests vests vests - no vest will directly result in pneumonia
Slippers - see above

Mine always harped on how she didn’t breastfeed either kid... like would ALWAYS mention it!! And if she was over on an eve during witching hour or cluster feeding she would have a heart attack!I haven’t told her I still feed my 18 month old 😬!!

Dm thought giving just a single purée was boring and they definitely needed a pudding too. After leaving dd for the night (first time) I returned to find her eating boiled eggs, toast with butter and a sippy cup of milky tea - she had never had eggs, dairy or wheat before (luckily she has no allergies and still loves tea). Apparently it's what I ate at 7 months

But did you all know that breastfeeding on demand is the reason why babies have reflux? And of course, a baby must wear a hat outside in ALL weather otherwise they can get this terrible illness called COLD. It’s good to talk about the possibility of the baby getting COLD at every opportunity. Oh, and their hands are great indicators of their temperature.

@Daisychain1987 yesssss.... babies didn't have reflux 40 years ago, because no one spoiled their babies with too much breastmilk.

My mother suggested I talk to my ds 3 about what he did in nursery when he came home

Isn't that a normal thing to do? I know we always did. It was usually colouring, or Mrs Xxxx was having a baby, or Sally shared her grapes at break time. Or someone had a new puppy. What's wrong with chatting to a 3 year old?

"Oh dear you poor thing that bath water must be very uncomfortable but then your mum does like to give you cold baths doesn't she...?"

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What a nasty thread

It really is.

My MIL has some groundbreaking facts for you and it's a surprise they havent been published for peer review:

1. Babies must sleep until 8am (DD has always woken anywhen from 5am). 2. ts selfish to bf as GPs cant feed the baby. 3. If a baby is ill it must be teething or the weather (she was saying DD was teething from 2 weeks old) even if the dr has diagnosed a virus. If baby does have a virus it's due to the sun (I'm imaging the sun's raise beaming down germs). 4. Bed sharing is disgusting. Your DH should always be your priority over your DC but they will just grow up and leave you.

Needless to say she has never had DD overnight

I returned to find her eating boiled eggs, toast with butter and a sippy cup of milky tea

Okay, the tea is a wee bit off, but I'm failing to see what's wrong with this one either. Unless there's some backstory about suspected allergies, these are surely normal things to feed a 6+ month baby?

And the one about asking your child what they did at nursery - who doesn't do this?! (DD's answer is always "played"! )

When you are grandparents, just remember that the advice you give based on current thinking may well be viewed by your DILs as equally insane in future.

Give him (2 month old DS) calpole every 4 hours “just in case”.

He’s not hungry, he’s got wind. So she wouldn’t have to hand over crying baby who was due a feed.

I’m going to go against the grain here and say that my mil has never gave me any ridiculous advise. My mother on the other hand

Don’t say to a 5 day old baby, whilst mum is in earshot ‘are you crying because you look like your mummy, don’t worry you’ll get used to it’

I wonder how many of these MILs will be 'used' for childcare purposes in future years.

@InfiniteSheldon

What a nasty thread. Only Mil give unsuited or unnecessary advice? What awful old women caring and loving their sons children. Are you related to Les Dawson OP?

I agree, nasty thread, nasty OP, nasty responses.

How on earth did the previous generation manage to raise happy, healthy adults?

@TypingError

4 years in, 2 kids, 4 cousins not 1 day between us!

"If baby is crying, find out what makes them stop and do it again next time they cry."

"If baby is crying, check if they are hungry, thirsty, hot, cold, and if there are any insects near them."

Real words of wisdom 🙄

I wonder how many of these MILs will be 'used' for childcare purposes in future years.

Well I had to stop "using" mine after she had a huge, violent argument with FIL in front of one of my children. Never stopped with the comments though...

Don’t say to a 5 day old baby, whilst mum is in earshot ‘are you crying because you look like your mummy, don’t worry you’ll get used to it’
@emmaluggs sorry but that is EVIL GENIUS

I moved to my DH (and MILs) country when DD was a baby.
My MIL advised me that the way I could learn to speak the language was if I only every spoke to DD in that language. Ie communicate with my DD in a language I couldnt speak! And it didn't matter about teaching her English , because that's not important...

This is such a horrible thread.... just full of vitriol and hate.......

I wonder how many of these MILs will be 'used' for childcare purposes in future years

Fortunately my in-laws never offered/asked to babysit. Ever. The one time I asked MIL to sit for DS she rang constantly from 30mins in as DS was wingey - oh, yes, that'll be the colic that has brought me to the depths of pnd that she denied and blamed on BF. She thought that I should wean from 2 weeks by switching to bottle feeding and dissolving bits of rusk in his milk.

My kids haven't seen either of the in-laws for 2+ years now, their choice.

This is such a horrible thread.... just full of vitriol and hate.......

I like to think that the people posting on here, like me, have a difficult relationship with their MIL. Therefore posting on here is a way to make light of some of the smaller annoyances, instead of focusing on the hell and anxiety she put me through when my first DC was born. She won’t ever be used for childcare and we see very little of her.

I have friends with good relationships with their MIL who wouldn’t have anything to say on a thread like this, because most MILs aren’t deserving of any ridicule. Most are lovely, kind women. I don’t see a problem with a thread for women who do have a nightmare relationship and need a bit of relief.