Getting rid of the dummy for a nearly 6 year old

[Totallyawinetaster]

Hi all, I need some advice on how to get rid of my nearly 6 year old DD's dummy. We have tried everything to convince her to give it up and nothing has worked. I know she's really old to still be having a dummy, but now she is so attracted to it that she won't even consider giving it up.

We've been through the dummy fairy, giving it to Santa, the Easter Bunny taking it, we've read all the books, tried bribery, threats, we've lost it, forgot it going on holiday, everything. You name it we've tried it. Everytime it ends in a fit of crying and screaming, and she ends up with the dummy.

Part of me wants to believe that she'll stop using it on her own, but I can't see it anytime soon. Does anyone have any advice?

Good job! And I totally agree that cuddles are fine, she is genuinely going to be very upset, and cuddles are to soothe her. You're not giving in unless you actually give back the dummy.

Good luck and hope she sleeps well

I taught a 10 year old once who still had a dummy and juice in a bottle at bedtime. Never seen teeth like it - black and rotten, the other kids recoiled from them. Her mum had a mouth full of false teeth. Just picture that being your daughter every time you feel like giving in. Good luck

We've done it, she's asleep!! I've got a glass of rosé, but I feel like it should be champagne 🤣🤣

We've done it, she's asleep!! I've got a glass of rosé, but I feel like it should be champagne 🤣🤣

Well done! Keep strong for the next few days too

Well done OP! It might flare up tomorrow but stick with it. Do not buy any more and make sure your DH doesn’t cave and buy some. It won’t be fair on your DS to turn back now, otherwise all that distress will have been for nothing and you’ll just have to do it again at another time. Stand firm.

Sorry DD. Typo

Well done x

Well done OP you've done great! Keep strong

Amazing! Well done!

Yay

We're trying to limit dummy use for our DD who's fifteen months old then I read about a six year old who has a dummy still!

You come across as making excuses as to why you can't get rid of the dummy's, she has loads, if you throw them away she'll still find another one. There can only be so many

When I was young I used to suck my thumb. The dentist opened a drawer once and got out a big pair of pliers and said he'd have to pull my front teeth out as they'd stick out like a rabbit if I carried on. I stopped straight away, maybe you need to explain the effect it will have on her teeth?

I stopped wearing dummy at around that age. Just before going to primary school.

It was a little traumatising, I'm not going to lie. My kids don't have a dummy for that reason.

My mum just sat me on her lap (i still remember the situation vividly) and told me I was a big girl going to school and I needed to stop using it. I cried a bit but that was it. No more dummy. I remember at night trying to suck on my thumb but I was not into it.

Preivious posters are right. You need to stop giving in to tantrums.

Good luck!!

@LudaMusser RTFT.....

Awesome!!! Well done 🥂

My now 10 year old still had a dummy at night age 5, one night just before bed her younger sister (who never took to a dummy) threw it and as it was the only one and we couldn't find it luckily that was it. I wasn't looking forward to stopping it.

Show her pictures of disfigured teeth then bin it.

Well done ..enjoy your glass of rose and sleep well 💐

My eldest was 6.5 when he finally gave his up. He was diagnosed a year later with asd and adhd so it's not always as simple as it sounds.

Parent her.

We read this rule in The Baby Whisperer book when we had our first. It's the 3 day rule. It takes 3 days to make or break a behaviour. If you want to change a behaviour, you must stick to it for 3 days. The pain (tantrums whatever) get less each day (or night). 3 days later, new behaiour set. But be warned, if you slack and let things slide for 3 days, a new behaviour will be set and you've broken the one you worked hard to set.

Honestly, you need to toughen up in the tantrums and manipulative behaviour. Short term pain for long term gain. Kids need safe and secure boundaries. If they don't feel you push back, they'll keep pushing to look for those boundaries, to look for a reaction from you to show that you love them enough to push back. Their behaiour will get more and more extreme otherwise.

My son was around 4 when he still had his dummy at night. We went to the dentist for a check up and she explained to me and ds that if he continued with the dummy it would force his teeth forward. He understood completely, we walked out of the dentist, he told me he wouldn't have the dummy anymore and from that day forward he didn't. I think you just have to make a clean break and tell dd that's it but that can still be done kindly.

Cold turkey I'm afraid....we did with our just turned two year old. Two nights of crying and crying (it was hard!) but no way do you give in, ESPECIALLY at her age. Sorry OP you need to sort this now! She's six for goodness sake!

Well done op - now don't cave and this time next week you'll have cracked it completely! Don't cave!