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Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

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Original poster

DD doesn't call me Daddy :-(

119 replies

Manc1993 · 05/04/2019 13:30

My 2 year old daughter calls me by my first name instead of Daddy. I gently tell her to call me daddy but nothing has changed and still calls me by my name. This is concerning me and I need your advice. My daughter always calls my partner mum or mummy, so is there something I am doing wrong or is it just a phase that she will eventually grow out of. I give my daughter all the love and attention I can give and feel a little aggrieved and upset that she doesn't call me daddy or dad. I need your help

OP posts:

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mindutopia · 05/04/2019 13:39

At that age, children only behave how they're taught. Who has taught her to call you by your first name? Mine didn't even know we had first names then! Are you actively involved in her life and parenting her? Surely, it just comes naturally when she sees you and interacts with you and knows your role in her life. If you haven't been present and you are more of a 'friend' then, I can imagine all she would know is how other adults talk about you. So it really comes from how you are talked about in her life and how you interact with her yourself. It would be a very odd thing from a child to an engaged parent, unless someone has taught it to her as a joke?

Mrsjayy · 05/04/2019 13:41

We used to call each other mum &dad when 1 of ours started doing this btw it is nothing personal just something she has cottoned on that gets a reaction from you.

Knittedfairies · 05/04/2019 13:47

If your partner calls you by your name it's not surprising your daughter does as well. She's copying what she has heard, which is how we acquire language.

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Original poster

Manc1993 · 05/04/2019 13:48

Thanks for the post. It is possible that my DD has picked my name up from her mum calling me. Both me and my partner give her equal attention, love and affection but I feel less of a parent when DD addresses me by my first name not daddy or dad. You might think I am being silly but it would be nice if she calls me daddy or dad as I am not her step dad or adoptive parent. I keep telling her nicely and gently that my name is daddy but she still calls me by my first name. Hopefully she will soon grow out of it and call me daddy

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 05/04/2019 13:49

I don't think it is unusual i worked with toddlers and their parents and it was a common phase they went through.

SoyDora · 05/04/2019 13:50

It is possible that my DD has picked my name up from her mum calling me

Surely that’s the only way she’s picked it up?

MyKingdomForBrie · 05/04/2019 13:51

At that age, children only behave how they're taught.

Ohhh I see!! I knew I shouldn't have thrown myself on the floor in Waitrose and screamed when I couldn't push the trolley..

Orr.. toddlers have a mind of their own as well as sucking in information from around them and they mash the two together to sometimes produce an interesting result?!

Mrsjayy · 05/04/2019 13:52

If you are asking her a question say things like can you do this or that for daddy or get your jacket on for daddy basically daddy after everthing and don't correct her if she calls you by your name

Original poster

Manc1993 · 05/04/2019 13:53

I never call my partner by her name, I always address her as baby or babes. Our DD never calls my partner by her first name its always mum or mummy. I sometimes feel like I am the lesser parent or that she doesn't think of me as daddy

OP posts:

Badwifey · 05/04/2019 13:55

I second having your gf call you daddy in front of her. I wouldn't worry too much at this age. My nephew did it with both of his parents and they each reminded him they were mam and dad and he eventually just reverted back.

Mrsjayy · 05/04/2019 13:55

I'm sure she doesn't see you as lesser if she is happy to spend time with you just ignore when she says manc instead of dad

Beamur · 05/04/2019 13:56

Keep your reaction neutral. When you talk about yourself say 'daddy'
Don't read anything into this at all. She's not doing it to upset you. She might find it interesting that you react though.

SoyDora · 05/04/2019 13:56

She’s 2. She calls you what she hears other people call you. It’s as simple as that!

RaspberryBubblegum · 05/04/2019 13:56

Do you work and mum stays at home? Only asking because I am a SAHM and we talk about "daddy" a lot. About how he's in work and coming home soon etc. My DD has never referred to him as anything other than daddy but if I didn't do this perhaps she would also be calling him by his first name? Perhaps ask your partner to refer to you as dad/daddy from now on? It's definitely nothing personal. She just thinks that's what you are called

GregoryPeckingDuck · 05/04/2019 13:57

How advanced is her language? She may not understand what a daddy is yet

Original poster

Manc1993 · 05/04/2019 14:00

I am sure our DD will grow out of it but its so frustrating. I am probably going about it the wrong way by correcting her every time she calls me by my name.

OP posts:

Original poster

Manc1993 · 05/04/2019 14:03

Our DD knows basic words but only words that she picks up from daily conversations and her favourite CBeebies characters. Me and my partner are currently stay at home parents and both have equal share of bringing our daughter up. I have the same interaction with our daughter as my partner does so I don't understand the reason for calling me by my first name and not daddy.

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 05/04/2019 14:05

If you ignore it and emphasise Dad she will grow out of it as somebody else said she is 2 and maybe doesn't understand dad yet. Read books with dads in watch peppa pig with daddy pig etc etc but don't let it upset you .

LooksBetterWithAFilter · 05/04/2019 14:05

I have a friend whose ds called her by her name all the time. He called his dad, dad but his mum by her name. She used to get people saying oh I thought he was yours and she had to say yes he is.
He did it up until about nursery age. If you referrrd to his mum he knew who you meant he just never called her mum. He does now and has done for a good few years now and he’s 8.

Original poster

Manc1993 · 05/04/2019 14:07

MrsJayy - My name is Trevor

Manc1993 is only my username :-) Thanks for the post it helps to get advice from others mums. It has put my mind at ease

OP posts:

AmmarettoSours · 05/04/2019 14:09

as pp have said get your dp to call you daddy infront of dd.
my dd is the same age and will call dp by his name sometimes
once in tescos i called down the isle to dp to grab some bread please babe, dd then shouted grab bread please babe

drspouse · 05/04/2019 14:09

I think MrsJayy knew that.

ItsInTheSpoon · 05/04/2019 14:10

I did this when I was little, have no idea why. My dad never minded and I changed when I got older - I think I started to feel silly amongst school friends. I’d just ignore it but refer to yourself as daddy whenever it comes up. I expect she’ll grow out of it!

Original poster

Manc1993 · 05/04/2019 14:11

Our DD has always known my partner as mum or mummy because I never address my partner by her first name. Is this the reason why she calls her mother by her title and not her first name?

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 05/04/2019 14:11

Well I did know your name wasn't actually manc I was just making a point

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