OK have been meaning to start this one for a while - what are you insouciant about re yr kids?

[Clary]

Sorry for silly long word in the title. I really mean, what do you let go and think is OK that others might not. I am convinced we all have sthg.

For example, a pal is a lovely mum and really caring but once carried more children in her car than there were eseast for. I would never do this.

Another really really lovely caring mumsnet type mum who makes her own bread and loves her lovely kids to bits and does all kinds of imaginative stuff with them but passes on shoes.

Another is lovely too, shoes always nicely shined, house is clean and tidy, children very polite, ride bikes, read well etc, but are fed total crap - and refuse any brown bread, salad, fruit etc (at least that's all the kids were ever given at playdates there).

So what's your thing you just don't think matters? I'm not after judging (tho no doubt this will go that way) but interested.

Tp show I mean it, here are mine (I have 2); 1) I let my kids lick out the cake mix bowl (the car friend thinks this is unacceptable). Raw eggs, schmaw eggs. Am I putting their lives at risk?

2. I am a bit casual about illness. If DD is sick (she often is) but not really ill, ie she throws up then asks what's for lunch and goes and runs round in the garden afterwards, I don't wait 48 hrs to send her back to school.

See, I told you I was a bad mother!

oh yes ds goes to bed at 8:30 (ish) ... was 9 tonight

So's mine!! She gets hysterical and demands a new top

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oh yes nappies

ds rarely gets through more than 4 in 24 hours and it's been like that since he's been about 2/3 months old.

unles he poos or it's pretty soggy it stays on, and if he poos less than 2 hours before bathtime he gets left with no nappy as i have so few they need to last..... he prefers waving his naked bum around anyway

i'm not even sure we use 4 !! today we used 3!! i did have to dry ds trousers under the hadndryer in the toilets though cos i had left one on too long

usually try and change him about every 4 hours but sometimes i just ... forget.

the odd thing is i do check his nappy and it can be bone dry about half an hour before i change it but dripping when i change it... very odd!

DD's dressing themselves when we are staying home.

DD1 always choices clothes that just don't go together and she ends up looking a total mess. I always hope the neighbours don't see her playing in the garden in case they think I'm a bad mother or that we can't afford nice clothes for our dc. And God forbid any friends just pop round without notice when she's wearing her choices.

Her choice yesterday was:
Bright blue top with long white sleeves, combat green skirt which has a pink ribbon detail on bum and pockets. All set off my a nice pair of red/orange witch style stripped knee length socks (think dsd brought her the socks - they are really bad - must find a way to bin them soon, only problem is dd1 loves them).

DD2 started with tracksuit bottoms and a t'shirt (hate tracksuits but dss buys them for dd's) odd socks no changing her mind without a screaming match so left it as we were staying at home with no visitors planned. Clothing not too bad just looks very casual ended up in a nappy and odd socks and dirty t'shirt (playing with stones in garden) jumping up and down on the trampolin - hope no neighbours show!!!

Meant to add dd1 ended up bare footed in garden - my fault I never wear shoes if I can help it and they copy refuse to wear slippers etc but dh hasn't own any and I never brother hate up feet.

Floating, you are not weird for the bath sponge thing. They are full of germs! DD has given up sucking on everything she can get her hands on but this was one of the few things I set boundaries on.

Bloss, in France they are sooo obsessed with catching cold. My FIL wears a scarf in the summer when he has a cold as he thinks it will help him get better quicker!

When I was just starting out in parenting and not at all confident, I was made to feel like a BAD MUM because I don't make DCs keep their slippers on indoors and let them go barefoot on tiled floors which are cold in the summer mornings and freezing in the winter mornings.

bloss - thankyou, thankyou, thankyou! I've jsut realised that all the things you are 'souciant' (?) about are the same as me. I couldn't think of anything earlier and was getting quite worried.... So I do care about some things. Yay!! Not a totally rubbish mummy then... goodie.

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ds gets clean clothes every morning but within about half an hour is usuall grubby and stays that way (i had horrible yuck of mum licking tissue and getting grub off my face and will only do that to him if it is some big occassion). so he is fairly grubby! I konw that lots of mums find this despicable.

I will happily (well, with only a slight knot in my stomach) watch him doing something physically precarious on a climbing frame and only go to help him if he asks...again based on being very physically fearful and loving that he is fearless.

too much telly but only cbeebies and lazytown his favourite.

let him lick out the cake bowl.

whole grapes.

pretty much everything actually!

ooo yes bloss i am stickler for sleep and bedtime routine. also branded clothing....hate that.

also car and road safety.

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I pass on shoes

feed the kids crap if I feel like it

let them lick out the bowl

have carried more kids in the car than seats

and

let dd1 and 2 (7 and 4) go and see the pony on their own (five minutes away across fields, they cannot be seen from house)

am stickler for plenty of sleep and nourishing food 90% of the time

good manners, thinking of others and beign kind to animals

everything else I don't worry about particularly

If I find myself worrying about the kinds of things on this thread I know I am getting stressed and run down

bloss, I used to say that too - about branded clothes - be aware that it only works as long as it's entirely up to you!

After that it really isn't worth the trouble. You will not be judged if your teenagers wear logos.

no brandnames?

god you lot like making work for yourselves