Under the sea or clouds and rainbows???

[MummyMiddleton]

Or baby boy is due on November 10th. We have a room for him but we don't want to buy and furniture or decor until we know what theme we are choosing. We are stuck between under the sea and clouds and rainbows. Both are equally cute.
We would paint the walls dark turquoise/aqua for under the sea and pale blue for clouds and rainbows. My mum has an art degree and will be painting the decor on top of the base colour (sea creatures and plants or clouds connected by rainbows).

If you had to choose, what would you go for?

Oh my god, lots of people hate cuddles, children included!

Poor Daniel

Left alone scared at night with the eyes of a thousand jellyfish upon him and forced to cuddle his parents all day :(

I really hope you haven't written a birth plan that you expect to stick to like glue.

at Drama.

RiverTam

I didnt mean it to come across that way. So you are saying that if a child comes to your room at night to get attention, you should treat it the same as if it were daytime? What kind of routine or stability is there? Children need to know what at night we sleep. During the day we play.

DramaInPyjamas

I never said we wont go in if he cries. I just said we will get him as settled as possible then see if he can do the last bit (falling asleep) on his own. We are not going to just hear him crying on the and say "na" and go back to sleep. I never meant that.

I hope your more loving towards baby when his here.

Your happy to play video games all night but baby needs to self settle and not expect a cuddle?

Poor kid.

Your newborn baby WILL feed to sleep. You need to adjust your expectations.

We are not doing it for our benefit. We are doing it because it will help him in the lomg run.

Also, if we hear him crying we will get up and cuddle him until he stops crying, but then we will put him down in his basket or cot and retreat (maybe not even l go back to bed, just retreat) and see if he can fall asleep. We will wait 10 minutes and if he is still crying, then we will see whats bothering him. We are only trying to help him sleep well...

One big major thing to remember is...

a LOT of other parents lie about how well their babies sleep

I have no idea why, but they do. Focus on your baby and forget how well Johnnys baby down the road sleeps. Chances are his exactly the same.

OP, a baby cannot 'regulate their own emotions' they simply do not have the cognitive function...my 4 month old has only just worked out that he has TWO hands attached to his body

We all have wonderful ideas of parenting...before we become parents. I didn't plan on certain things but my son certainly didn't read the manual and had different ideas from day 1. That's his personality.

Also, only having a few hours sleep because you've been up gaming is a complete different kettle of fish from only a few hours sleep with a newborn! Babies are relentless.

Genuine question, what if your baby has colic or reflux? Some babies can scream hours on end for no 'obvious' reason. They can be fed, winded, clean nappy, cuddling them, etc but just won't settle due to colic. It's 4am and you've been awake for nearly 24 hours straight. What are your plans then? Your baby finally falls asleep on you. You put him down in his Moses basket and he suddenly wakes up crying again coz he wants to be held by mum or dad. Do you leave him scream or eventually leave him sleep on you?

If he falls asleep while feeding, there isnt much we can do. He needs to eat. I was more refering to if he is just cranky

How far along are you?

crazypenguinlady

We dont expect him to regulate his emotions as a baby, I was refering to an older toddler or school child with that one.

If he has colic or reflux we will give him medicine and make sure he feels better before we put him down to sleep. If he falls asleep on us, then thats fine. We will just put him in his bed asleep. A poorly baby needs to be looked after, they dont feel well.

Im 5 months

You are doing it for your benefit, stop saying your not.

I think clouds and rainbows. So peaceful.

We arent, we dont really care how much sleep or game time we get. Its good for a baby to learn to fall asleep. We would never leave him crying for prolonged periods of time, we are just going to gently try to get him to close his eyes and drop off in his moses basket or cot.

I can guarantee you that everything will change on that first night you have baby home. You will both be absolutely exhausted but will be gazing at the baby sleeping on one of your chests, debating who he looks more like, all night.

Every plan will go out the window.

If I waited 10 minutes, there is NO WAY he'd self soothe, he's screaming, red face and holding his breathe!

So I deal with his needs as quickly as possible. It's my job as a parent to work out what his cry means and deal with it, including helping him to sleep, even now at 4 months. The rest of the time, he's a very alert and contented baby.

No, you don't treat it as the same as daytime, but you don't treat it as 'bad' behaviour or a bad habit, either.

You just need to alter your thinking on what 'bad' behaviour is in a young child - and it is obviously not possible for a baby to be bad in any way, shape or form (which is why referring to a baby's 'good' behaviour isn't terribly helpful either - babies can't be bad or good, they just are).

Those moments are precious and magical. Every parent has them. But a routine needs to be put in place eventually, definately not on the first night though. Everyone needs to settle in and adapt to having a baby around before any reigeme or parenting practices begin. Obviously. You cant just come home from the hospital and start acting like your a month in. Its new, terrifying and lovely all at the same time

I'm going to fess up here, I did sleep training with DD, and by being mislead with what a certain baby book told me, I did it at too young an age. I don't really know if it worked or not, but one thing I do know - I did it for my benefit, not hers. Absolutely, 100%. (It's likely that I had undiagnosed PND which meant that I found every single thing about being a parent almost unbearable difficult, but nights I could hardly cope with at all. If I'd got the PND sorted, I think mine and DD's first couple of years would have been very different, and a lot better. But we're through and way past all that now.)

You really think you have all the answers don't you!?

Trust me, if your baby has colic and you've been awake for days on end, when your baby eventually falls asleep, possibly on you, you'll be so grateful you won't want to risk moving an inch, let alone putting baby down.