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Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

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Original poster

Under the sea or clouds and rainbows???

711 replies

MummyMiddleton · 02/07/2017 15:21

Or baby boy is due on November 10th. We have a room for him but we don't want to buy and furniture or decor until we know what theme we are choosing. We are stuck between under the sea and clouds and rainbows. Both are equally cute.
We would paint the walls dark turquoise/aqua for under the sea and pale blue for clouds and rainbows. My mum has an art degree and will be painting the decor on top of the base colour (sea creatures and plants or clouds connected by rainbows).

If you had to choose, what would you go for?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:24

Titty

We wont

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AmysTiara · 07/07/2017 12:29

You don't sound well to be honest with you. Very controlling and fixating on bizarre ideas.

Loosen the reins a bit and you might actually enjoy your baby boy.

Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:33

AmysTiara

How are my ideas bizzare. Not wanting a child who sleeps in our bed every night and lives off of chicken nuggets and plain pasta?

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Sirzy · 07/07/2017 12:33

The problem with having such focused, fixed ideas is that when things don't go to plan it's a long way to fall and can be very demoralising and hard to deal with. It can lead to feelings of guilt and blaming yourself for things going "wrong"

People on here are talking from experience, it's all well and good having vague ideas of how you want things to go but don't be too set in stone is all people are saying.

Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:34

Sirzy

Thanks

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welshweasel · 07/07/2017 12:38

I think you are high risk for having issues with mental instability if your baby doesn't fit into the rigid plans you have made for it. Having a baby is really hard work and sometimes you have to make compromises on your parenting to maintain your sanity. Most people figure this out fairly quickly post birth but those that don't, and feel that anything less than perfection is not good enough, can really struggle. I've seen it too many times.

I desperately wanted to breastfeed, it didn't work out, I used a dummy despite being totally against them, I coslept for short periods of time because it was the only way I could get enough sleep to function, I occasionally fed him 'bad' food and sometimes let him watch peppa pig so I can get other stuff done. I did all sorts of things that I was dead set against, because you will do whatever you have to do to get through the day. I am an educated, intelligent woman with a professional job and I can hands down say that raising a baby has been the most challenging thing I've done. I just worry that if things don't go to plan (they won't!) that you won't have the mental resilience to cope with the compromises you will inevitably have to make.

Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:41

welsh

We will cope, we just want Daniel to be the best person he is capible of being. Not comparing to anyone else. He doesnt need a masters degree at oxbridge or a million pounds. We just want him to be healthy, happy and good.

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Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:41

welsh

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Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:41

welsh

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Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:41

welsh

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Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:42

Omg!!! Stupid fucking app!

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AmysTiara · 07/07/2017 12:43

It just all sounds so joyless. Like the baby will definitely fit in with your ideas end of.

But maybe it's the way you write. It's a bit more than crap food and cosleeping .

Oh well nothing to do with me how you raise him. Enjoy your son and good luck.

Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:44

AmysTiara

There will be fun. What, do you think we are just gonna not play with him? He is going to have loads of toys and we will always interact with him. Fun will be an endless supply. Its good for you

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TittyGolightly · 07/07/2017 12:45

We just want him to be healthy, happy and good.

And if he's not?

BrieOnAnOatcake · 07/07/2017 12:46

Maybe try the book, "How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk" for a bit of perspective (but admittedly more useful once they can talk ;) I love their approach though!)

Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:48

Titty

If hes not healthy, like if he has an illness or something - not much we can do except be there to love and support him through everything.

If hes not happy - we will talk to him and support him and try to make it better

If hes not good - depending on his age, we will give him an appropreate consiquence for the behaviour

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Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 12:49

Brie

Will get it. Sounds great x

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Parker231 · 07/07/2017 13:15

OP - I think you are going to struggle to cope if your son doesn't fit into your plans. We had one who until he was 5 rarely slept a whole night in his own bed and other who lived on rice and pasta until she was 3 - what would you have done in those circumstances?

Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 13:19

I wouldnt let him sleep in our bed. We would use Jo Frosts stay in bed technique. We wouldnt let him just eat rice and pasta. He will be given a wide variety of foods and flavours right from weaning age. We are not going to use jars of baby food. When he is weaning, we will blend up last nights dinner for him to eat.

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welshweasel · 07/07/2017 13:22

Most babies eat anything, whether it's jars or last nights dinner. They get fussy as toddlers. I can assure you that if your toddler doesn't want to eat what you've offered them, they won't, and if they are really fussy it will get to the stage that you will feed them whatever they want just to get calories into them. Toddlers are stubborn as hell and yes, they will starve themselves

TittyGolightly · 07/07/2017 13:27

I'm out.

You haven't a clue about normal child development. You want a child that does everything you want. It's a dangerous framework to work within.

And even when it's pointed out to you (along with scientific fact) you jump straight back to Jo fucking Frost.

Your kid is likely to be utterly miserable.

Parker231 · 07/07/2017 13:27

Sorry OP but you haven't a clue. We didn't want our DS to sleep in our bed but his will was stronger than ours and at 3am and you're exhausted you don't have the energy to keep taking them back to their own bed.

We used jars - both worked full time so it was easier and the jars aren't poison! Are you going to force feed them when they refuse the food you prepare? Ours would go hungry rather than eat something they didn't want. Children are very often incredibly fussy over their food.

EssieTregowan · 07/07/2017 13:28

So basically what you're saying is that the rest of us who are accidental co-sleepers with kids who will only eat orange food are just doing it wrong?

Dont you think the majority of us have tried all the techniques? Not super nanny though, that bitch cray.

krakentoast · 07/07/2017 13:29

I just read the OP and then the MNHQ post without reading anything in between and, er, wow... think this escalation really sums up Mumsnet!

I'd go for clouds and rainbows

Original poster

MummyMiddleton · 07/07/2017 13:35

Why is Jo Frost cray when her methods work?
But no, you would all rather wrap your kids up in cotton wool than teach them something.

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