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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Parenting

What's the funniest thing your DC said today?

84 replies

malaleche · 11/03/2007 22:55

DD1 3.5 yo:
If you don't give me another biscuit I won't eat this one!
Eh?!

OP posts:

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PetitFilou1 · 12/03/2007 16:24

Yesterday evening, ds (3) put his towel round his waist after bathtime then said 'I'm going for a shave. I'm going to put the hot water on. Don't touch the hot water' (looks serious and wags finger) Had to smile at that one.

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FioFio · 12/03/2007 16:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Enid · 12/03/2007 16:25

our cat used to have a brother called George

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Cappuccino · 12/03/2007 16:27

doing maths homework where she pretends to be shopkeeper (she is not the world's best mathematician)

'so how much change from 10p would I get it I bought this, Shopkeeper?'

looks puzzled for a minute before replying 'Oh I haven't got any of those left'

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KathyMCMLXXII · 12/03/2007 16:29

This was unspoken so you'll have to imagine it.

DD (21 months) decided she was going to breastfeed her doll.
She got a muslin square
She got a cushion
She sat down with the cushion on her lap and arranged the doll on it

Then she looked down at her front and saw.... dungarees.

So she gave up and gave her a bottle instead.

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kittypants · 12/03/2007 16:30

KathyMCMLXXII thats so cute!

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kitbit · 12/03/2007 16:31

PMSL Kathy!

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AnAngelWithin · 12/03/2007 16:31

my ds (3) said 'i love you more than monkeys' i take it im supposed to be flattered?? lol

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totaleclipse · 12/03/2007 16:32

dt1 (3) said she could'nt run up the hill because it was too heavy

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MrsWednesday · 12/03/2007 16:35

DH did a big long sad speech to DS1 (4) at the weekend, about how our cat was poorly and may not last much longer. He was quite choked as he was saying it.

DS1 looked at him and said

'Hmm. Can we get a rabbit instead?'

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kitbit · 12/03/2007 16:35

dh and ds have just gone out, and before he left dh asked ds if he wanted to put his cars down and kiss mummy goodbye. ds looked devastated (not easy to part him from his cars) then with a meaningful look at me he bent down and placed his 2 cars very carefully end to end by his feet, stepped over them very gingerly and said "cars, no! mummy kiss" before air-kissing me and dashing back across the room yelling "CARS!! CAAAAAARS!"

I suppose I am just honoured that I got 10 secs of his time!

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totaleclipse · 12/03/2007 16:37

I'd be honoured if I got 10 seconds peace

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yeahinaminute · 12/03/2007 16:47

My DD (4) the olympic procrastinator !!

trying to get her to hurry up with breakfast this morning:

" Roisin - will you just EAT - we're going to be late and I have to drop you at pre-school and get to work - I have a meeting you know"

Roisin: " Oh OK - and may I say mummy I think your jacket is the nicest thing I've seen you wear in years - I wish you had meetings every day so I can see you in your lovely jacket"

Then she went back to faffing with her breakfast, singing a song and generally la laing around - !!!

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SpookyMadMummy · 12/03/2007 16:49

my DD1 last night announced to me that the ice cream man was called.....................broccoli!

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Tamz77 · 12/03/2007 20:25

DS having a few problems at nursery - naughty-style problems. This was one of the chats we had about it:

Me: So what's the trouble then? Why are you acting silly in school?

DS: I have to annoy my teachers!

Me: Why?!?

DS: It's my JOB!

(he's kind of right...)

Also, visiting DS's half-sister who is in hospital atm with 5 per cent burns following a domestic accident, DS looks at her very seriously and says, "Try to be more careful next time!"

He is 3.5

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WestCountryLass · 12/03/2007 20:28

My 5 year old said "Your belly is getting really big, like really massive and your bum is growing too, you are like a great big fat hippopotamus!" (I am 9 months pregnant and I did laugh)

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hillary · 12/03/2007 20:35

My dd2 was at her uncles house and was trying to explain to her uncle about spilling some water on the floor (tiled) he was not listening at all just kept nodding with his nose in his newspaper, she was really trying to explain what had happened (she'd spilled her drink) after about 5 minutes of endless trying he stood up and trod in it, shreiked whats that??? she simply replied PISS! and walked off!

I don't encourage swearing at all but it was so funny.

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indiajane · 12/03/2007 20:42

My DD2 asked my why her grandad was always going out "Cricket Vampiring"

He's a cricket umpire!

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Boco · 12/03/2007 20:43

Dd aged 4 said ' why does uncle jake always go to walrus?

Me - huh?

dd - whenever he comes to stay, he says he wants to go to walrus! Why????

me - What's walrus?

dd - that shop full of dvds and games and they have some dora splora socks that i like.

ohhhh. Woolworths!

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purpleturtle · 12/03/2007 20:51

"I made a mother's card at nursery, but I can't bring it home yet, because it's a secret... ... oops"

From 4 year old ds1, with the cutest expression on his face by the time he got haltingly to the oops.

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FrannyandZooey · 12/03/2007 20:52

Boco how funny, ds was wittering on about "Woolworths" this afternoon and he was saying "Woolworths - you know, it's an animal. WOOLWORTHS." This went on for ages with him getting crosser and crosser until he said "IT HAS TUSKS "

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mollymawk · 12/03/2007 21:04

Am still laughing at Sobernow's dd2's beard comment.

Can't think of anything funny my sons have said for some reason but the other day my dh was talking to our nephew (age 11), who was discussing what languages he might like to learn. In the end he thought Spanish would be best "because most of the population of China speaks Spanish".

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IamBlossom · 13/03/2007 21:01

Told DS1 (2.5) that we were taking his baby brother to the doctors this morning because of his poorly willy (needed some cream for his ezcema (sp)). Sitting in the waiting room, in comes a typical "Kevin the Teenager" on his own, head down, hoodie and board shorts, "too cool for school but very very embarassed about nothing" demeanour, you know the drill. The doctor calls his name out and as he shuffled in DS1 calls out to me very loudly "Does that boy have a poorly willy too Mumma?" The whole room heard, and I laughed out loud before I could help it, the poor poor boy I bet he wished the floor would swallow him up!

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FrannyandZooey · 13/03/2007 21:04

He gave me a (pretend) rose and said "Mummy, do you know why I am giving you this rose?"

I said "No" thinking the answer would be "becasue I love you so much" or something.

He said "Because Daddy and I are getting married, and you are going to be the bridesmaid."

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LindzDelirium · 14/03/2007 14:09

DH and I have a "seperate" holiday each year away from DD (4.5) just so we can recharge batteries. DH goes ski-ing, I go on tour to watch my favourite band (Manic Street Preachers). Little altercation with DD today in which I said "if you continue like this you will NOT be going to the Lion King with Auntie Linda!!!!!!!"

To which she replied "if you keep trying to brush my hair Mumm you will NOT be going to Manics!!!!!"