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Original poster

do you check on your children every night before you go to bed?

130 replies

mistressmiggins · 23/01/2007 22:19

I do...

my ex had the kids at the weekend & DD (2 1/2) told me shed been sick in her bed while away

I wrongly assumed she was making it up as exH had said nothing, but have just emailed him and he said that yes she was sick on Sat night but he didnt find it til Sund morning

I check every night b4 I go to bed & I know that ex doesn as he never did when we lived together

DD had suspected mengititus at 1 1/2 & only reason they rushed her into hospital was cos I checked her b4 I went to bed & called ambulance

OP posts:
RubyRioja · 23/01/2007 22:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 23/01/2007 22:24

I check dd. I can hear ds2 from outside the door - he's so noisy even when asleep - and ds1 (18) goes to bed after me.

Biglips · 23/01/2007 22:24

always and always give DD a kiss too x

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lulumama · 23/01/2007 22:24

i most certainly do .....after i have done everything i need to do, the last thing i do is check them..make sure they are warm enough, that they are covered, or not , depending on te weather and that i have touched them and kissed them...every night, as does DH

also, if you have had a bad day, it does warm your hear to go in and stroke their hot little faces and kiss them ....

Original poster
mistressmiggins · 23/01/2007 22:25

I dont feel Im overreacting but why wouldnt you check your kids every night?

for exH to find the sick Sunday mornign but admit it happened Sat night, it must have been dry & in her hair / on her bedding

what makes it worse is that he didnt mention it & I assumed she was making it up

I dont want to stop them staying at his but how do I make him realise that when you have little ones, you need to just check all is ok
why wouldnt you WANT to?

OP posts:
Pinkchampagne · 23/01/2007 22:26

Yes I always check on the boys, tuck them in & give them a kiss before I go to bed.

SherlockLGJ · 23/01/2007 22:26

I do check every night, but..... and I never thought I would be defending your X arse, I have frequently checked at that age only to go in the next morning and find him quite happily sleeping in it.

The reason X probably didn't was because he knew you did.

I do religiously.

DH less so.

Unless he has fallen asleep on the couch and is coming up hours later.

DISCLAIMER

It grieves me greatly to have to back that prick up in any way, but in the interests of fair play.

Mistymoo · 23/01/2007 22:26

I don't always check them. DD is 3 and DS is 6.5. The last time I did my DD was sleep talking and asking if daddy was making pizza!

BettySpaghetti · 23/01/2007 22:26

I always check my two every night - I go in, tuck them in, give them a kiss and tell them that I love them.

evamum · 23/01/2007 22:27

I check DD before bed for same reason, she had been sick once and I only spotted it when I checked on her, no noise over monitor and she had rolled the other way so not in it but still....
DH doesn't but its cos he is a noisy sod and always wakes her but he makes me do it!

belgianmama · 23/01/2007 22:27

I never used to, but for some reason I do the last couple months. When DH is home I know he always checks, so I don't always do it then. Usually I just stick my head round the door though. I'm too afraid that I'll wake them if I tough them (you know sleeping monsters and the like,...)

Hulababy · 23/01/2007 22:27

I do. I always go in and give her a kiss, and turn off the fairy lights round her window. DH always goes in and kisses DD too.

My mum and dad always did when we were at home; even as teenagers they came and said goodnight.

Original poster
mistressmiggins · 23/01/2007 22:27

lulumama - thats why I do it - you want them to be warm, comfortable etc

Im glad your H does

my ex never did when we were together & always made3 out I was making a fuss

now once a month they are in his hands & he doesnt bother checking

my poor DD waking covered in sick
you can die from inhaling sick - I KNOW that sounds dramatic but its true

OP posts:
sandyballs · 23/01/2007 22:28

Yes, always. I couldn't sleep without tucking them in and kissing them goodnight, and putting a little cross on their foreheads, like my dad always did to me.

Our DDs spent last Saturday night at their grandparents and when I went to bed I found DH smelling the girls' pillows, bless him.

moondog · 23/01/2007 22:28

I was going to say the same as LGJ.I don't think my dh would
(and I also know this man is a selfish prick and a bad father.)

I check on my kids every time I wake in the night,which is about three times on average.
Probably overdoing it..

sandyballs · 23/01/2007 22:28

Perhaps he will after this occasion mistressmiggins.

lulumama · 23/01/2007 22:29

my DH checks the kids every night , and sometimes wakes them up for a kiss as he gets home long after bed time ...

CountTo10 · 23/01/2007 22:29

I do - got into the habit from the first night ds was in his own room. Always go in, tuck him in give him a small kiss, whisper night night, sigh about how gorgeous he looks when asleep and then creep out! He's 2.3 and I should imagine by the time he gets to 7/8 he'll have an alarm set that prevents me from doing it so he can't be kissed against his will!!!!

belgianmama · 23/01/2007 22:29

I meant that I never used to check them every night until recently. I do check extra carefully when one of them is ill.

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 23/01/2007 22:30

yes always.

turquoise · 23/01/2007 22:30

Always, still - they're 12 and nearly 9. Probably still will when they're 18.

beckybrastraps · 23/01/2007 22:31

I checkon my children every night, as does dh.

But, and using the same disclaimer as Sherlock, my dd has woken in the morning covered in vomit. SHe must have vomited after we checked and just either slept through or gone back to sleep. And yes, I felt bad, but what can you do? I was asleep.

Original poster
mistressmiggins · 23/01/2007 22:31

point taken LGJ

I think its more the fact he didnt bother telling me and had to hear it from a 2 1/2 yr old so assumed she was making it up

its just hard when they are so far away & you "trust" their dad to look after them

interestingly enough, this weekend's visit has gone from "great" to " the kids behaviour was naughtier & harder to deal with than normal" so maybe finally exH is having to actually be a parent!

OP posts:
Bozza · 23/01/2007 22:33

I always check on mine. Dh not so much - but he says it is because I do. But I certainly don't if I wake in the night which I often do. DD nearly always needs her covers sorting out.

However I have to say that I have been to DD and she has been laid in a pool of sick. And I have been to DS and he has been fine, but I have found him in the morning in the sick with a rash over his face and body because he has been laid in it for ages. So could be either way in the case of your DD.

Will ask DH what he does if I am not here (infrequent).

EmmyLou · 23/01/2007 22:33

I do - although when shattered I'd rather not have to traipse up to the attic to check DD1 (11) but I do because if I didn't...THAT would be the time that something was wrong and besides, I always check the younger two. Sleeping children can melt your heart.

Fast forward 7 years and I'll have a shock if she's brought the boyfriend home