Literal-minded kids names for things -

[SoonMeansNever]

3yo DS and I were baking muffins on Sunday, he called flour 'pastry powder'

I don't imagine that one'll stick once he knows the real word, but DH calls quiche 'egg cake', and friends of ours all call raspberry jam 'pink jam' since the kids named it years ago.

Any more?

ds got the wrong end of the stick when someone referred to a "house spider". he is certain they are called "house CLEANING spiders". If only.

When DD was small we had 'windscreepers' for windscreen wipers. DS1 used to talk about 'fuman beems' (human beings) and 'ponkins' (pumpkins).

DD was watching me put on makeup one day. She asked what it was. I said 'mascara'. She asked if she could try some of my 'scara'. She thought it was called 'scara' and it was 'my scara'.

Near where we live (in Weymouth) there is a statue of King George III, with a lion and a unicorn either side of him. DS2 was in his buggy and saw them statue. 'Ooh look, a lion!'. Cue DS1 (very wisely) 'yes, DS2, a lion, a unicorn and Jesus'. Me and my Mum almost fell in the road laughing. I explained to DS1 that it was, in fact, a King. He thought for a minute then said 'well, Jesus was a King, wasn't he?'.

As a toddler, DD2 was obsessed with taramasalata, which she'd eat by dunking a breadstick or carrot. Naturally, she called it "dunk".

I still write "dunk" on shopping lists as it's shorter and easier to spell than "taramasalata"

She also used to refer to my breasts as "bolsters"

'I got the pardon me's!' (Hiccups)

And 'I love you for all the days' (forever)

We are in scotland and my three year old insisted on asking everybody if they were voting independence or outdependence!!

Raisin wheats cereal was always known as Mummy's breakfast, when mine were little, although they were allowed to eat it if they wanted.

DS (3) gets me to sing "Old MacDonald had a farm" by requesting "Animals Make Noises" :-)

I think the spanner for beans is Genius.

My DD (now nearly 5) used to say dollyfish for mermaid & radi-dryer for radiator & very strangely radiator for reindeer?!! She no longer says any of these, I can only wait in wonder to hear what her lil sis will come up with!

Dd calls neopolitan ice cream 'mixed up ice cream'

And when she was small she asked for a 'pyjama dress' (nightie) like her sisters

I can remember a few of DS2's:
The microwave was the 'beep'
The washing machine was the 'round & round'
Going upstairs was known as going 'up bears' which was so cute.

Shreddies will forever be known as 'new bresha' in this house. When DS was about 2, he always had weetabix or porridge for breakfast. For a change one week I got shreddies , and his face lit up when he saw it "ooh - new bresha!" (Couldn't say breakfast).

We still call shreddies new bresha, he's 7 now.

We also distinguish parks by colours - we have the red park (with or without ducks - there's 2 red parks for some reason), the blue park and the green park. Also the elephant park and the otter park (totally outed myself now).

Loving orange yawn!

DS (6) says he has dried his Leg pits (groin) after his bath.

He used to call his elbows his bend bows. I miss that!

DS born 5 November. "Colour bang! Colour bang!" he said when he was 2....

Oh, I've remembered another one - I drank so much Diet Coke when DD was a toddler that it was known in our house (and loudly in shops) as Mummy Bottles. At least it wasn't wine.

DS1 almost always seems to remember the proper name for things or asks if he doesn't know so we don't have many cute DS1-isms. I'm hoping DS2 will be different, although DS1 will probably be on hand to correct him constantly! My favourite one is "nose-crumbs" which seems to have recently morphed into "crumbsies" so he'll come & ask me to get the "crumbsies" out of his nose. He also has eye & ear crumbs.

Oh, gliding you've just reminded me... Coke in our house is called "Granny's coffee" because my dad drinks coffee to keep himself awake & my mum drinks coke!

My DS asked me what the red cage house was for. I was flummoxed until I realised it was a phone box. Next problem was trying to explain why people had to stand inside one to make a phone call as he gazed at the mobile phone.

My D.D loved tigger when she was little and out shopping with her one day she pointed a box of Frosties and noticed a picture of Tony the Tigger and she said. "Mama, can I have some tiggers, and she used to call coco pops monkey tiggers. It's still stuck now.

Dd called the washing machine the wishy-washing. She couldn't say umbilical cord either and it came out as biblical cord.

the sharkener
for pencils
because it makes them pointy like sharks teeth

DD is 4 and here are some of hers:

The big bad wolf - the big bad woof
Coat hanger - hang coater
Chewy Vitamins - medicine sweeties
Packed lunch - Lunch pack
Plain toast- untoasted slice of bread

Sorry that last one should be the other way round:

Slice of bread - plain toast

He's rather embarrassingly invented a new phrase as since starting school he's decided that Poo is far too rude! Soooo... 'toilet brownie' is his polite euphemism.