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Original poster

Stay at home mums with kids at school, why dont they get jobs??

910 replies

sleepinbeauty · 20/09/2006 16:32

Just a bit hacked off with mums at school, they moan about having no life away from their kids/ not much money, yet they all seem to refuse to get jobs or careers!
why do some women just want to do sweet FA all day when their kids are at school? They seem content for their husbands to slog their guts out at work while they drink cups of tea and watch daytime tv! Dont get it! i think its called laziness??

OP posts:
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ComeOVeneer · 20/09/2006 16:49

Who says that they aren't willing to change it? You are very presumptious. Do you know their circumstances,? There may be reasons why getting a job may simply not be feasible (such as the ones people have already posted here).

iota · 20/09/2006 16:49

hula - have only done 1 class in 2 weeks so far

beckybrastraps · 20/09/2006 16:50

Perhaps they want to look after their children after school and during the holidays? Perhaps they realise there's a price to pay for that, and feel they can let off a bit of steam with other parents without being referred to as lazy?

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sugarfree · 20/09/2006 16:50

If you're so busy with your marvellous job,why on earth do you care.
I think you need a second job really so you have less time to worry about what everyone else is doing.

hulababy · 20/09/2006 16:50

That is okay then iota. Hope it is one of those gyms you can just stroll on a treadmill at walking pace watching TV

I do love a thread where I can boast about how little I actually do on my days off, when child free

VoluptuaGoodshag · 20/09/2006 16:51

What do you mean what is there to do????? When my two are finally at school all day I shall happily stay in all day and do my feet! I can't wait to get the chance to do all those things that are nigh on impossible with two toddlers in tow. If you can't think of anything then you must be a boring person. And fwiw, anyone who moans about a situation and does nothing to change it generally pisses me off but are these woman moaning. I'm guessing they are happy with their lot and what is it to you anyway.

NumbskullNinja · 20/09/2006 16:51

I think it must depend on your personality and ability to enjoy housework or find other things to do. I am temporarily in the position of being at home while my kids are at school- have finished college but no job and particular circumstances mean that it may be a couple of months before I can start work. And I'm dead dead dead bored already. I just find it really hard to use my time constructively without the routine of a job and feel like I haven't achieved anything at the end of the day. Find housework so dull and do the bare minimum (more than I normally do though!) while feeling guilty that I'm not doing more. Extra time to mumsnet and and swim and read is good and I like the relaxed start to our mornings due to not having to rush off to work but apart from that I don't see the attraction. Lack of dosh from not working means living life of luxury not possible- grr. I guess if it's a long term prospect people ensure they find more interesting/worthwhile/enjoyable things to do?

hulababy · 20/09/2006 16:52

Maybe we should list all the things you could do in child free time, so we have a better idea...

you know, like going to the toilet in peace without a child following you! Or putting make up on with out a little girl tryingto pinch your lipstick....

golds · 20/09/2006 16:53

I do the odd bit of working in the week, mainly at the school that way I get all the hols off, I haven't been able to find a term time 10-2 job anywhere else.

Actually today I was really cross, had to finish watching doctors 10 minutes early to pick kids up, there is just not enough hours in the day to watch daytime TV does anyone know what happended ?

maryfairy · 20/09/2006 16:54

How do you know they sit on their arses all day? And how do you know that they would be better off financially working for a couple of hours a day? It isn't very nice to make sweeping assumptions about other people's lives.

MarsLady · 20/09/2006 16:55

Why should they?

We makes our choices and that's that!

Just cos you're hacked off with a few mums at school I don't think you should take your wee brush out and tar all the others.

Oh and should you wish to spend a moment in my home........... well I'm sure you'll find it's not quite the way you think that it is!

Was only going to post the first sentence then thought.... nah... let's just get in there!

iota · 20/09/2006 16:57

I was chatting to a mum on teh school run this morning ands she suggested that I take up golf - keeps you fit, is sociable and takes up a lot of time (if you are my PILS).

Dh has offered to buy me a set of clubs for Christmas

Original poster
sleepinbeauty · 20/09/2006 16:57

i didnt mean to cause offence! And i am an intelligent person, thanks.Also i did work part time when my youngest was at nursery but before this i was a SAHM studying for my Masters at same time. i know toddlers are hard work but im talking about school age kids here. Dont you feel its unfair on your partners that they have to work and you dont? Just seems really unfair , that all...

OP posts:
SpaceCadet · 20/09/2006 16:58

i wish i had child free time..id quite like to gop back to work so as i could get some peace and quiet
but wouldnt want to then have to come home and clean, wash, iron, cook tea etc.

figleaf · 20/09/2006 16:58

Is this what you were after sleepinbeauty? not sure what must be missing in a person to want to start a "fight" like this and force folk to justify themselves.

puff · 20/09/2006 16:59

I don't give a shit tbh

iota · 20/09/2006 16:59

my dh actually prefers me not to work, so that he doesn't get roped in to the chores that make family life go round ( school run, housework, kids activities, dental appts and so on)

Mascaraohara · 20/09/2006 16:59

Hi Iota.. yes we must do lunch again soon. Is school going well?? settled in nicely I assume?

iota · 20/09/2006 17:01

[sep conversation for Mascara]

ds2 is fine Mascara, how's DD getting on is she F/T yet?

saggarmakersbottomknocker · 20/09/2006 17:01

Life's not fair sleep.

In fact life's a b!tc£ and then you die. Why spend it doing something you don't want to do. So, if you like working, that's great, carry on, and those who want to stay at home and can afford to can do that too.

Mascaraohara · 20/09/2006 17:02

not f/t until next summer term!! b*stards! settling in fairly well though I think. Will drop you a mail tomorrow, just heading off home now..

SpaceCadet · 20/09/2006 17:03

sleepinbeauty..just because your children are at school, doesnt mean you are sitting around doing nothing while poor hard done by dh slaves at work, the reality for many women is day in day out, school runs, housewqork, shopping, out of school clubs, cook tea etc, all before dh comes home.

scotlou · 20/09/2006 17:03

Personally, I think once children start school they actually start to want you MORE. My ds frequently asks why I can't work part time so I can collect him from school. He has to do without me at events held within school hours. I know of a few mothers who have stopped working for that reason. I know many SAHMs - and they are definitely not lazy!

JoolsToo · 20/09/2006 17:04

the OP has got to be a bloke!

this site should be called 'judgenet'

its beginning to pee me off!

KateF · 20/09/2006 17:04

I think sleepingbeauty has got an interesting point in whether it is "fair" for our dh's to have the entire responsibility for financially supporting the family. I now my dh feels tremendous stress about this and he very much wants me to work full-time to share the burden. Trouble is, child-care for 3 children is v.expensive and I do like to be the one who is there at the end of school and who makes it possible for them to have hobbies like dancing and swimming.