I'm not even sure if I like Ds1 anymore......

[LadyTophamOfHattingford]

He absolutley drives me around the fuc*ing bend.

Every single day we have the same issue. Honestly, without fail he will come in to our romm and wake me up to ask a random question even though EVERY night I tell him not to wake me up.

Every day I have to nag him to pick his stuff up whther it's PJ's, clothes, books, games, everything. He plays with it, wear it (or whatever) and just leaves it there when he's finished.

Every night at dinner it's the same things we have to say to him. "Sit on the chair properly", "use your folk/knife properly", "stop messing about"...it goes on and on.

Every day he seems to jump on every opportuntity to wind the other 2 up. Takes stuff they are playing with claiming they weren't even though I know they are and might have put it down to put something else with it.

He never accepts the first answer he gets unliess of course it's yes. Honestly his 2 yr old brother is better at accprting the word No.
He cries if he isn't allowed to do what he wants.

I made a start chart thing last week with a "before school", "after school" and a "before bed" section. Ds1+ 2 have to get a star in each section to earn pocket money. Ds2 loves it and tries so hard to get his little chores done (it's stuff like, homework first then telly, put Pj's on bed, dirty clothes in washing bin in each section so nothing difficult) and has got a star in each section. Ds1 on the other hand has less than half the amount and he honestly couldn't care less. I really don't know why I've bothered making it for him.
He is harder work than ds2+3 put together and in 7months time when this new one arrives he'll still be harder work than all 3.

Over the years I've been on MN I've started a few threads like this about him so I'm really not sure if anyone has anything new to suggest. I think I just want to get it off my chest.

yes the book there tomorrow
getting it out reminded me of all the good bits of it

am going to read it again now you've reminded me of it. cld you remember it well enough to implement strategies though or am i just thick??

Is it worth buying Cod ?? Or at least looking for second hand on ebay ??

I brought the 123 magic one but couldn't get into it, so if anyone wants it shout now.

hmm no it is very detaille
d the only ones i rememebr are to describe the problem ratehr than oredering

ie mes in bedroom

" oh i can see a lto of stuff onthe floor"

or pint out a pitfall " bike iunt he way cna make poeple fall over"

also different ways ot get msg across liek putting a post it note in the firdge " i lilke to be really codl please dont forget to shut me" did htat re dha nd his shoes he pissed himself

LTH I know just how you are feeling I think. (Thread yesterday started by me about being all shouty.) My ds is a lot younger and tbh this thread scares me.

Nothing to add except that boys are strange illogical oddballs. Hope it gets better soon.

(agree about cod)

someone on mn reccommended that to me after i posted thread re ds1's behaviour. read reviews on amazon and was a bit put off...
has anyone been to / considered parenting course??

Mmm - I'm constantly saying 'Food is for eating, not for playing with' atm. Must read the book again - it is good.

that was to pruni btw!

I have been to a parenting course very recently CF.

If you can find a free one then I'd say it's worth it, but I wouldn't pay to go to one because it's all stuff you know really.

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oa nd another one i haave used is that when they are relaly cross abotu somehting or being tantrummy

say..they have left somehtig at school over the weekend and are crying that they want it... rather thna saying " OH DONT WORRY WE WILL GET It on monday"

you say " oh i bet oyu ar really disappointed that you haevnt got it, if i could id( cue make up bit) get in a helicopter na fly ontot he roof and winch myself down and get it"
kid laughs prob over

its the proto teenage behaviour that really gets me going... the grunting... the "its al so unfair"... and the mooching about aimlessly... oh and the rudeness...
(but he's lovely really)

What was to me??

mine was raher unkind to a younger boy in the street today

is in disgrace

( i mean playing out on our raod) worte lette rof apologya nd had to go around and explain why he was wrong
is inviting boy out to play tomorrow night

do you think so nc? when i'm beating myself up about my crap parenting i feel as if i know f all... or worse still that i am turning into my mother (and tha's not a good thing!....)

Ta for link, am watching it.

phterwise ill get lTH to send it on to you when she finishes
it may be a while is long book

sorry pruni. am confusing myself now. i meant that was to nc (re the 123 magic book)

Ahhh but you do know it really, you just forget when stressed or think there is an easier option. I know i did.

But watching all the vids and that in the class, I realised I already knew how to parent properly, it was just going to take more effort.

The books yours if you want it CF. Email me your addy [email protected].

If you don't like it pass it on or send it charity shop.

that's really really kind nc. that's the nicest thing anyone has "said" to me on here. i love mn. just reading this post makes me feel better about any problems i have with ds1. will email you. thanks

cf

control freaky bog oof
( will that do )

No prob

and you nutty bog off